Owner: A Treasure of SMS, Ultimate Stories, Jokes & Poor Jokes - Daily Updating URL:http://sms-unlimited.blogspot.com/ Join Date: Mon, 25 Jun 2007 11:34:08 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: A Treasure of Unlimited SMS, All Kinds Of Jokes and Ultimates Stories of all kinds whether Non-veg Jokes, Little Johnny Jokes, Sardar Jokes, Elephant Jokes, Poor jokes, insult, funny, friendship, love, greeting, decent, crude, Decent, Flirt, Good-morning/ Site statistics:Click here
Appendectomy 2007-07-05 08:30:00 Five-year-old Little Johnny answered the door when the census taker came by. He told the census taker that his daddy was a doctor and wasn't home because he was performing an appendectomy.
"My," said the census taker, "that sure is a big word for such a little boy. Do you know what it means?"
"Sure! Fifteen-hundred bucks, and that doesn't even include the anesthesiologist!"
How the tail is attached to the cat 2007-07-05 08:29:00 A teacher puts a photograph of a Tomcat on the blackboard, and proceeds to ask the class, if they can tell her how the tail is attached to the cat?
Little Mary has the first attempt and answers "By fur Miss?"
The teacher replies "Not quite right Mary, but a good try."
Meanwhile all during the lesson Little Johnny is sitting down the back raising his hand in the air saying "Me, Miss! Me, Miss!"
Sex print 2007-07-05 08:27:00 A little jhonny went with his dad to see a new litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were two boy kittens and two girl kittens." "How did you know that?" his mother asked. "Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied. "I think it's printed on the bottom."
TAMPONS 2007-07-05 08:18:00 Johnny and his younger brother walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of WHISPER and proceeded to the checkout counter.
The man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"
"Eight," the boy replied.
The man continued, "Do you know what these are used for?"
The boy replied, "Not exactly, but they aren't for me.
They're for him. He's my brother. He's four.
We saw on
Wildcat 2007-07-05 08:17:00 Little Johnny is sitting on the front porch steps and his 17 year old sister is sitting in the swing in a dress with no panties. She notices Johnny trying to get a look up her dress so she picks up her knees and spreads her legs and asked "Johnny, what do you think about my WILDCAT?"
Johnny looks up, stares all bug eyed and replies, "That's a mean motherfucker sis!"
Sis asked, "Why do you think
Christmas 2007-07-05 08:15:00 Priest asks little jhonny about christmas but faints with his answer. Priest :"What do a Christmas
tree and priest have in common?"
Little jhonny: "The balls are just for decoration."
Little jhonny and his father Loco 2007-07-05 08:00:00 Once there was liitle jhonny in church. He had to go to the bathroom so he told his mother, ''Mommy, I have to piss.''
The mother said, ''Son don't say piss in church. Next time you have to piss, say, 'whisper' because it is more polite.
The next Sunday, the litle jhonny was sitting by his father this time, and once again, he had to go to the bathroom.
He told his father Loco, ''Daddy I have to
AMAZING fact or Fault of Windows 2007-07-04 09:41:00 An NEDian (from NED UET Karachi, Sindh-Pakistan) discovered that nobody can create a FOLDER anywhere on the
computer which can be named as "CON".
This is something pretty cool...and unbelievable. .. At Microsoft the
whole Team, including Bill Gates, couldn't answer why this happened !
You may like to try and ask your friends to as well......
TRY IT NOW!!
IT WILL NOT CREATE "CON" FOLDER!!! Read more:Fault
, Windows
Rearrange the Letters REALLY AMAZING 2007-07-04 09:39:00 DORMITORY
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM
PRESBYTERIAN
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER
ASTRONOMER
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER
DESPERATION
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE EYES
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE
GEORGE BUSH
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE
THE MORSE CODE
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE Read more:Letters
, REALLY
CAN U BEAT THIS RESUME 2007-07-04 09:35:00 RESUME
EDUCATION /Qualification:
1950: Stood first i! n BA (Hons), Economics, Punjab University ,
Chandigarh ,
1952; Stood first in MA (Economics), Panjab University ,
Chandigarh ,
1954; Wright's Prize for distinguished performance at St John's
College, Cambridge,
1955 and 1957; Wrenbury scholar, University of Cambridge,
1957; DPhil ( Oxford), DLitt (Honoris Causa); PhD thesis on India's
export
kapde ki dukaaan se chori 2007-07-08 01:53:00 Judge: Tum qabool karte ho k tumne kapre ki dukaan se 5 baar chori ki, to kia kiya churaya.?
Chor: Janab ek saarhi..
Judge: lekin ek saarhi k liye tumhe 5 baar chori karne ki kia zaroorat thi.?
Chor: "Janab, 4 baar meri biwi ko saarhi pasand nahi aayi thi.."
Last night the moon said to me,
"if ur friend is not messeging you,why dont u leave ur friend"
I looked back at the moon & said
Oye
Chandni chaand se hoti hai 2007-07-08 01:51:00 Ladki boli: Chandni chaand se hoti hai, sitaron se nahi, Mohabbat ek se hoti hai, hazaaron se nahi. Ladka bola : Chandni agar chaand se hogi to sitaron ka kya hoga, Mohabbat agar ek se hogi to hazaron ka kya hoga.
god said :: i can't e everywhere
so i created friends..
devil replaced : i too can't be everywhere
so i created girl friends..
boy propose to a girl ::- do you love me.>
New punishment 4 cell owners 2007-07-08 01:49:00 New punishment 4 cell owners
Missed cal ke liye JAIL.
Sms k liye FAASI.
Call k liye UMRKAID
aap mat daro
KANJUSO ko to inaam hai.
,.__,..
'-/. . '-'___,,
'e_,' .; ( )
c'./c'./-c./
Ja Tommy ja. . . .
Jo log mujhe SMS nahi karte unke MOBILE par su su kar aa.
Teacher: Is it posible dat a person Name & Surname both R same?
Srdar: ya, If Lara Dutta marries Brian Lara,
she
Mohabbat ho jati hay ya karni parti hay 2007-07-08 01:47:00 aj ka sawal: Mohabbat ho jati hay ya karni parti hay?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
very simple: Khubsurat ho to ho jati hay. ager ameer hoto karni parti hay.
19-Feb Joks
aik aadmi k pas jin tha,
jin bola "Aaqa" mujhy koi huqm dain.
Aaqa replayed : Yaar mery ghar say Amrica tak aik Road banao.
Jin : Aaqa ye mushkil kaam hay, resty hain darya atye hain, pahar atye hain, jungal aty hain, abadiyan atye hain,
Monkey in Polyethene 2007-07-08 01:44:00 kia kabhi ap ne MONKEY ko polythene main lipte hue dekha hai?:-) no?? ....never mind to phir jaldi se apne IDENTITY CARD dekh lo
woh ladki thi deewani si,dekhne mein achi lagti thi,
nazare jhukake sharma ke galiyoin se guzra karti thi,
aur kehti thi....bartan lelo bartan..............................
o mere dil de chain,tere piche kutte pain.
tu luteya mere dil da chain rabb karke
Doctor se badla Lene ka yehi 1 rasta hai 2007-07-08 01:42:00 Santa: Is operation se mujhe kuchh ho gaya to isi doctor se shadi kar Lena.
Jeeto: Aise kyo kah rahe ho?
Santa: Doctor
se badla Lene ka yehi 1 rasta hai!
Interviewer: Aap kisi MAHILA mein sabse pehle kya dekhte hain?
Santa: O ji, wo is baat par depend karta hai ki woh aa rahi hai ya jaa rahi hai?
Santa declares: I'll never marry in my life and I'll give same advice to my children also
BOY AND GIRL 2007-07-08 01:39:00 ;) LARKI:bas ab mein tumhein nahi karne dongi.....
LARKA:thora aur karne do
LARKI:kisi na dekh liya tu
LARKA:kuch nahi hoga bas sedhi raho n thora khula rakho
LARKI:nahi bass ab mein tumhein aur nahi karne dongi.,,,
LARKA:plase thora aur karne do aaj mein na COPY nahi kya tu fail hojaionga
I WANT TO KISS YOUR LIPS...
I WANT TO TOUCH YOUR TEETH...
I WANT TO SMELL YOUR BREATH...
I WANT TO
eik din mein ne chand se pocha 2007-07-08 01:25:00 eik din mein ne chand se pocha
hai koi mere yar sa hasein?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
chand replied 102329 entries found....!
Ants were bathing n elephant jumped into pool.All ants got out of water,1 ant climbd onto da back of the elephant...
All ants cried
"DUBA DUBA KE MAAR SALAY KO"
5 rules for student
.
1.Never make noise in class respect the fact that others are sleeping.
.
2.Keep
tu jigar hay apna 2007-07-08 01:16:00 shushmita: +91 982142016
Bipasha: +91 93161164574
Malika: +91 9822923242
Katrina: +91 9874572585
Ja Enjoy kar.. sirf tere lye gift hay pagley tu jigar hay apna
Mohabbat karo ibadat k sath
Pyar karo sachai k sath
Dosti karo dianat k sath
Chalo ab reply karo sharafat k sath
Wo reshmi balon wali, wo bhori ankhon wali
Wo komal honton wali, wo naram peron wali
Matkati howi andhre main
Chand per ap ka naam likney ko jee chahta hay 2007-07-08 01:10:00 Chand per ap ka naam likney ko jee chahta hay
Laykin pehli baat tu yeh hay k mera hath nahi jata hay
Aur dosri baat yeh k yeh khayal mughey sirf doophar main he aata hay
ram ne sita se shadi ki....
ravan ne sita ka apharan kiya ....
hanuman ne sita ko bachaya....
to vastav mein hero kaun
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
..
.
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
ans......--->>>> Read more:Chand
Why india is not progressing 2007-07-08 01:01:00 Why india is not progressing
.................
Because out of Population of 100 Crore
- 9 crore retired.
- 30 Crore in State Govt.
-17 crore in central Govt. (who dont work)
-1 crore IT prof ( they dont work for India)
-25 crore are under 5 yrs
-15 crore are unemployed
-1.2 crore you can find anytime in Hospitals
-Statistics says u can 79,99,998 people anytime in jail
- REST TWO LEFT ARE YOU &
Inspector to Santa 2007-07-08 00:57:00 Inspector to Santa
:
Faansi se pehle,
bata teri aakhri ichha kya hai?
Santa: Mere pair upar aur sier neeche kar k faansi de do!
the wind,
the wind,
the naughty wind...
that blows the girls skirt high...
but god'z clever
he sends the dust along the
wind 2 close the boys eyes..!!!
Santa: I tried ur number so many times,
it always said 'Switched Off'!"
Banta: Nooo, it's my Read more:Inspector
Some translations in URDU 2007-07-08 00:53:00 Some translations in URDU
Wass up babe? = Munni upar kya hei?
Listen buddy that chick is mine. = suno dost woh murghi meri hei.
R u nuts? = Kya aap akhrot hein?
Rock the party. = Pathar maro jashan main.
Lets hangout = chalo bahar latakatay hein.
Urdu ki kitaab mein likha hai...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Aam ki khushboo barish ki bahar 2007-07-08 00:50:00 Aam ki khushboo barish ki bahar,
Garmi ka mosam aaney ko tayar,
Thori si masti thora sa pyar
Loadshading k lye raho tyaar,
Happy summer season yaar
gam mein tere tarap ke mar gaye ge
mar gaye ge pir b nam tera lege
rishwat deker tuje b upar bulayge
jab tum upar aho ge to sat beth ker kurkure kahege
lolxz
How an intellegent boy purpose to a gurl
.
.
.
.
He took da gurl along with
Kya dekh rahe ho 2007-07-08 00:47:00 Kya dekh rahe ho,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
apna kaam karo
CAN U ANSWER ANY OF D QUESTIONS????????
LETS SEE...............
Q. RAM SITA HAI ... TO RAM KAUN HAI ??
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
Ans - . TAILOR ( darzi )
Q. Ques - .SITA RAM HAI TO SITA KAUN HAI
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
Sita MEMORY hai (RAM: Random Access Memory)
Q- Prasad ask's Kumble to bring a pepsi... Kumble brings a
Jhalaak dikhlajaaaaaaaaa 2007-07-08 00:45:00 ek larka larki se.
Larka : Jhalaak dikhlajaaaaaaaaa jhalak dikhlaajaaaaa
.
.
.
Larki ne apne sandle nikale aur kaha : Ek baar Aaaja aaaja aaaja aaaja aaajaaaa
K%3M
K6fMIn
JOTH.+
@mw.58
#ampTNM
Kitne sweet ho, kuch bhi bhejo pyar se parhne lag jate ho.
so sweet.
Machar aur makhi ki hogaya shadi,
Pehli raat main ho gayi barbadi,
Machar ko kismat hi khoti thi,
Makhi mortien
aasman se taare tor kar laayenge 2007-07-08 00:40:00 Tumhare liye hum aasman se taare tor kar laayenge.....
Tum seerhyo ka inteezaam karna ooper hum charh jaayenge.
Fizao main tum ho hawao main tum ho,
Baharo main tum ho, Ghatao main tum ho,
Dhoop main tum ho, chao main tum ho,
Kyunki sach hi suna tha,
.
.
.
Ke shaitan ka koi tikhana nahi hota.
Qayamat Tak tujheyaad karenge,
Teri har baat per aetibaar karenge,
Tujhe sms karne ko to nahi
happiness can also kill 2007-07-08 00:40:00 Preeto: If I die what'll you do?
Santa: I may also die.
Preeto: Why?
Santa: Some time too much of happiness
can also kill a man.
Q: Why are Egyptian's Children always confused??
A: Because after death, their daddy becomes the mummy.
Q: What four letter word starts with F and ends with K and if a man can't get it he uses his hands?
!
!
F
.
.
.
.
O
.
.
.
.
R
.
.
.
.
K
.
.
.
.
A:
Meaning of ABCDEFG 2007-07-08 00:38:00 Meaning of ABCDEFG : A Boy Can Do Everything For Girls.
Reverse the letters GFEDCBA
Girls Forget Everything Done & Catch new Bakra Again
I asked my new girlfriend what sort of books she's interested in,
she said: Check books.
At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I hv lst my hand, oh!
Santa: Control urself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying? Read more:Meaning
KUTTE KO PATHAR MAAR DETA HOOON 2007-07-08 00:36:00 WHENEVER I WANT UR PRESENCE,
I READ YOUR SMS...................
WHENEVER I WANT TO SEE YOU,
I CLOSE MY EYES......................
WHENEVER I WANT TO HEAR YOUR VOICE,
KUTTE KO PATHAR MAAR DETA HOOON...........
CHAND PE KALI GHATA CHATI TO HOGI,
SITARON KO MUSKRAHAT AATI TO HOGI,
TUM LAAKH CHIPAO DUNIYA SE MAGAR,
AKELE ME TUMHE, APNI SHAKAL PE HASI AATI TO HOGI.
Lawyer : Don't u feel
Recommend Site To A Friend
