A voice, humbled
2007-12-10 10:32:00
I just want to express my sincere gratitude to all those who commented and e-mailed me about my last post, I was really touched by the humanity and empathy from my readers.In the past I have refrained from blogging about relationships/family life and such, but felt I'd make an exception on occasion. I would like to make apparent that as far as I'm aware, I'm not on the rocks - far from it. In fact, last weekend I was invited to her grandparent's diamond wedding anniversary, meeting her extended family for the first time. I felt very much accepted and more to the point, as I watched her grandparents cutting into their cake I wanted that to be me and her in about 65 years time.Perhaps I shocked a few people with the comment concerning attraction. I meant it purely in a corporeal, preferential sense. True beauty to me, is far more than skin deep (bleugh…and now I sound like a candidate for Miss World). In all sincerity, I will quickly get over the shock of it, and hopefully ge
Afflictions
2007-12-09 10:24:00
I can't remember the last time I was in such high spirits, as Saturday morning. I'd had a long lay-in, wasn't falling behind with work, enjoyed a hearty breakfast and made my way to the station. Hell, I think the sun may even have been shining. A half hour trip later and I'm at my girlfriend's town waiting for her to show up. She rings me, asking what side of the platform I was on - same side as always. Apparently, she's just around the corner. I wait a few moments and see a girl walking towards me. I ignore her, until she starts waiving at me. My heart sinks, I felt physically sick, palms start sweating and my hands are shaking.She'd dyed her hair. Her beautiful long blonde hair that I so adored is now gone.She picks up something is wrong, but can't work out why. I explained later in her room that I was really upset about it. It got so bad I cried a little, something I haven't done in, quite literally, years. She becomes very concerned, and thinks something else is
Chasing Cars
2007-12-23 05:48:00
The following is a completely true story I retold to the delight of hall mates earlier this term, I've meant to write it for a while but didn't get round to it for whatever reason. I think it's important to say, it has not been embellished, nor exaggerated in any way.It was about three years ago, when I was still in sixth form that my friends and I were out celebrating a birthday at the local bowling alley. The evening was relaxed, cheerful and fun with a few drinks and some good food. It was also a school night and so at around midnight we decided to leave, with the designated driver (whom I should add, hadn't been drinking) giving us lifts to various homes. B was a loud, playful individual and as we got into his cheap three-door fiesta hatchback he produced a CD he'd burnt on his home computer."Guys, you've gotta check this out" he said with much enthusiasm as he loaded it in and fiddled around with his car stereo. We burst into laughter as the Lion King soundtrack ca
Read more: Chasing
Nominated
2007-12-21 08:37:00
Best New Medical Weblog (2007)I am utterly speechless, and looking at the list of other nominees I dare say I can't help but feel flattered that I've been ranked amongst the best.Thank you so much to whoever nominated me, it has, quite literally made my day!
Autonomic Intermission
2007-12-18 10:59:00
For those of you who may be stumped, the correct answers for the previous post are B- X-ray and D- Pronation. Fortunately the other exam questions were up to scratch and proved more challenging. Still, couldn't help but snigger uncontrollably in the exam when those questions came up, though 45 questions in 30 minutes left little time for jest. As for the SSMs, no idea what happened there, still waiting on our choices to be allocated I guess…And now for something completely different - the autonomic nervous system!Shit! That sounds like real medicine??So far so good. It's only this week in preparation for our cardiorespiratory module after Christmas, but the content and lectures are generally far more interesting. Furthermore, the lecturer actually kicked out the late-comers who protested "But I'm only like, five minutes late"…yeah, try fifteen. Needless to say, it was nice to be able to hear the lecturer rather than some obnoxious prat sitting behind me chatting abo
An actual exam question - part II
2007-12-16 14:59:00
What action is this? A. SupinationB. Internal rotationC. External rotationD. PronationE. Circumduction(Note the name of the file on mouse hover)
Read more: actual exam
An actual exam question
2007-12-16 10:42:00
What type of image is this? A. CTB. X-rayC. MRID. Contrast media X-rayE. Ultrasound(And yes, if you were wondering the website was left on the image)Answers on a postcard to the usual address…
Read more: actual exam
When the weather outside is frightful, and FunMed so delightful...
2007-12-13 16:40:00
You've gotta love my halls - organising the Christmas party the night before the freshers FunMed exam. There's something so charming about walking into a cheaply decorated hall to the sound of Slade, very…youth-hostel. Still I went for a bit, reluctantly danced and had a few drinks - was great to get away from the lockdown of our corridor this week. So in terms of work, well not a great deal accomplished for our first exam but perhaps more worryingly is the lack of regret.Revising is the "hot topic' of conversation at the moment, understandably. If anything I'm more worried people will think I'm an arrogant prick for my reaction to this. Truth be told, I honestly can't be dealing with the stress of it all so soon into the course, especially considering its small weighting. Some freshers have been in tears, e-mailing the tutors asking what happens if they fail and contributing to a tense atmosphere that ebbs through the place. I feel sympathetic towards them, but a l
Read more: weather
, frightful
FunMed: the end of an earache
2007-12-11 16:51:00
Et voila, FunMed is over! Well, not quite. There is still the end of course exam that students are going crazy over. I've mulled it over a fair bit, and come to the conclusion that I'm not going to fail (you'd really have to work against the programme to do so) and with my current lack of motivation, don't really care how well I do anyway. Subsequently any reading I should have done has not really happened.I did go over microanatomy on the weekend, which is surprisingly (and perhaps shamefully) one of my favourite things we've done so far in med school. Perhaps as it's all new material, or a visual, aesthetic activity? I like the terminology for numerous reasons - there is a logical basis behind the nomenclature, and it is an articulate language in itself. Even when taken from the same tissue same, no two slides are going to look the same. There is a degree of abstract thought required, to put the tissue slices into a 3-dimensional context. It's a little bit of a detect
A voice, humbled
2007-12-10 10:32:00
I just want to express my sincere gratitude to all those who commented and e-mailed me about my last post, I was really touched by the humanity and empathy from my readers.In the past I have refrained from blogging about relationships/family life and such, but felt I'd make an exception on occasion. I would like to make apparent that as far as I'm aware, I'm not on the rocks - far from it. In fact, last weekend I was invited to her grandparent's diamond wedding anniversary, meeting her extended family for the first time. I felt very much accepted and more to the point, as I watched her grandparents cutting into their cake I wanted that to be me and her in about 65 years time.Perhaps I shocked a few people with the comment concerning attraction. I meant it purely in a corporeal, preferential sense. True beauty to me, is far more than skin deep (bleugh…and now I sound like a candidate for Miss World). In all sincerity, I will quickly get over the shock of it, and hopefully ge
Afflictions
2007-12-09 10:24:00
I can't remember the last time I was in such high spirits, as Saturday morning. I'd had a long lay-in, wasn't falling behind with work, enjoyed a hearty breakfast and made my way to the station. Hell, I think the sun may even have been shining. A half hour trip later and I'm at my girlfriend's town waiting for her to show up. She rings me, asking what side of the platform I was on - same side as always. Apparently, she's just around the corner. I wait a few moments and see a girl walking towards me. I ignore her, until she starts waiving at me. My heart sinks, I felt physically sick, palms start sweating and my hands are shaking.She'd dyed her hair. Her beautiful long blonde hair that I so adored is now gone.She picks up something is wrong, but can't work out why. I explained later in her room that I was really upset about it. It got so bad I cried a little, something I haven't done in, quite literally, years. She becomes very concerned, and thinks something else is
Zimmerflame
2007-12-06 11:43:00
GP day again today, though not a great deal to report on. It may have something to do with the lapse in concentration from the early start coupled with sleepless night or perhaps just the subject wasn't enthralling. Elderly people, the huge chunk of medicine that is apparently overlooked by the profession. I must confess, it wasn't top of my priorities and there was on the most part feigned interest.So came a 3 hour lecture from an ex-GP and ex-ex-surgeon who found his calling as a manager for Age Concern - not something I can relate to, but impressive none the less. Overall, it was a fairly PC talk on stigmatisation, needs and misconceptions of the elderly. Wishy-wash stuff really, some may call it common sense, but has to be done.For the latter part of the session we moved onto the taboo subject of "sexed up pensioners'. After the reluctance of my PBL group to openly discuss priapism in the scenario last week, I didn't expect much engagement. I don't find anything parti
Yawn
2007-12-05 16:21:00
"I heard there was a secret chord, that David played and it pleased the lord"- Jeff BuckleyI bet it was a b-minor.Lately I can't get to sleep very easily. For why I'm not exactly sure, but I'll turn in 12-1ish and still be awake come 4am. A plethora of thought, about nothing in particular, yet everything at once haunt me. Comparisons between yesteryear and the present, trying to see if change is for the better. I must admit, I do still very much miss my old life. Starting university for the second time is nothing like the first. The magic it seems is gone.Ironically, frustration at not being able to sleep leads to a more conscious state and the cycle feeds back. In a vain attempt to drift off I put my iPod on under my pillow. Jeff Buckley was my lullaby, and I hadn't listened in a while. Thus this post came to be. He has since been in my head the whole day, damn my subconscious!
Examinus Pyrexia
2007-12-03 17:11:00
Exam time is upon us for the first time, and with that comes the different personalities instilled deep within the crop of med students. Having never lived with people on the same course as me until now, on my part there is a feeling of unease, self-doubt and a competitive engine sparking up. The halls are quiet, too quiet for my liking. People are in the library, coffee shops, study rooms and parents homes reading through the mass of lecture notes we've slowly accumulated this term.Some people feel the need to vocally list their daily schedule, to include the hours of reading they've put in. Others don't mention it at all - they are the ones who scare me the most. The sly, subversive types who know the game keep their cool and come off top. Where do I place myself? Somewhere between the two, a little off centre though I am not sure in which direction.At the end of the day it isn't about passing the year, it isn't even about learning the material. It's about quartile ranki
Street Sense
2007-12-02 12:21:00
Recently, every Saturday night has been spent visiting friends in various locations throughout the capital where we all congregate to drink, eat, reminisce and watch X-Factor. Most of them are now working full-time in the city, as we all graduated last year. Unfortunately, it seems this week took a slightly unfashionable turn as it transpired that the girls had recently bought and gotten quite obsessive with SingStar - a karaoke game on playstation. Karaoke is fairly high up on my top 10 reasons to slit my own wrists list. Begrudgingly I joined in on occasion, oblivious to the vocal line and timing of most of the songs it chose.The problem with living in London is the last tube. I kept an eye on my watch, and at 11:45pm I announced we really had to be going so we could get the tube. Feeling a bit of a killjoy, I agreed to one more song. Then another, and another. I wasn't feeling it. I thought the last train was at 12:10am, to which I was informed they're never that early. Not li
Read more: Street
, Sense
Living the dream
2007-11-29 07:19:00
A quick show of gratitude to all of you whom have left such kind comments recently. It's not like my life has gone down the shitter, I just like to vent. Med school is awesome, life is sweet, no doubt. For those of you who may be interested I have managed to finish writing up the formal PBL essay - the only coursework I've had to do this term. I didn't really get stuck in to it for a while after I read the marking scheme:1. Learning objectives - all are stated and addressed2. Presentation - presented in such a way that it is understandable to the reader3. Content - focus and relevance4. Resources - Range, relevance and suitability of the format listedThis will be graded on the basis of generic writing skills (not factual content as such)So no marks for what I put, as long as it looks nice and is well cited.**************For brief word on the social life and setting, I'm far more comfortable in London now. I've adjusted to the endless noise, bustle and idiot pedestri
Read more: Living
*Insert witty title here* (because I can't be arsed to)
2007-11-25 17:46:00
A little snowed under, and unfortunately not the seasonal kind. I have let PBL get the better of me and consequently have spent most of the day writing up one after the other. As a result I missed the now traditional (i.e. Facebook-ratified) Sunday night curry on Brick lane. Arg. Well the pasta bake I made wasn't half bad…Spent the weekend with the lady which was a pleasure as usual. Unfortunately due to certain life changes she is now earning, making her the definitive bread-winner whilst yours truly is somewhat emasculated, trying his hardest not to be too frugal, but at the same time not go overboard with the bank. It's a balancing act, with equilibrium a little too close to the overdraft for comfort. Looks like it's gruel for dinner again.It has certainly been a week of little achievement, as perfectly exemplified by my current situation - sitting in my room with only the laptop glow to light up the place. You see, my light bulbs went around a fortnight ago and I am still
Read more: witty
A heart to heart
2007-11-22 15:11:00
General practice day, and was it ever a good one. Although there wasn't supposed to be a particular theme, I could only describe it as a sweeping introduction to heart surgery management in primary care. To start off we spent an hour with a patient, observing the GP extracting a long and detailed history of hypertension and unstable angina bought on by lifestyle choices.From the consultation it was easy to see this man was a patriarch, frustrated by his condition and eager to get back to work. He was a caged animal, unable to continue his arduous job and awaiting a heart bypass. Speaking with regret of past habits, making jibes at his history and warning us of the dangers, he was a real tribute to preventative medicine - put him on the back of a pack of cigarettes any day.In the lunch break we are given pages and pages of medical history for the afternoon's home visit. Right now, I have just finished marking out all the personal details with a thick black pen. All that's left is
In vain
2007-11-20 06:34:00
I finally reached the most dreaded day of term yesterday, not the day I saw my first dead body, nor the day of my FunMed exam. It was the day I had to put on a brave face and get a vial of blood taken from me by occupational health.In my truly stoic style I had bitched about it the entire weekend to my girlfriend, moaned the following evening to my hall mates and then again in the lectures the next morning. If there are any times in life I'm terrified, it's down one of three things - wasps, needles or sharks.Sweaty palmed and with extreme trepidation I went up to reception and tried in my most macho voice to explain I was here for a date with the sharps. I sat around waiting for a while, prolonging the anxiety somewhat until I was beckoned into the office. A lot of things were explained to me, most of which I have no recollection. Next I was asked if I wanted to be tested for HIV and HepC - not a mandate for medical students but it certainly is for undertaking exposure prone proc
Freudian Quip
2007-11-16 05:22:00
Yesterday's cultural diversity workshop wasn't as bad as I'd anticipated. Those things on the whole tend to be a nonsensical, open-ended, waste of time. I hate the whole overly politically correct verbatim that accompanies those workshops. Now, I'm not saying I would advocate the use of offensive terms by any means but when I mention that there are "Asian societies" and "Afro-Caribbean societies" at uni I get a little annoyed when we have to class those as "societies of a family background".Unfortunately for us, out of the 18 students in our room only 10 turned up. Still, in the room next door just one medic showed. Yes, one of eighteen?! So the class was divided and six of us went next door at the start of the session.At one point we are given self-reflective questionnaires and told to work in two groups of three. I began to work my way through questions such as "How do you express your cultural identity?" and "Discuss those places and events that have contri
Gall, blimey.
2007-11-15 16:12:00
Being the bright eyed and over-eager medic I am, and determined to get my moneys worth out of the Anatomy Society today I tagged along to a whirlwind lecture on abdominal anatomy. It started with a few interesting anecdotes, but from then on I was immersed in a world of unfamiliarity. I hardly spoke their language and had great difficulty visualising the orientation of the slides let alone understanding just exactly what part of the anatomy he was talking about. I was a foreigner, and not one to stop and ask for directions.But it was great.Now, after seeing the response of the older students being seemingly engaged and able grasp the material, faith has been somewhat restored in my course. I guess they will be teaching us something at some point, just not in FunMed (this term). Anatomy was one of the main things I really wanted to learn, be ace at, a stronghold in my competence. There's a lot to it, a lot more than I realised but I've not been put off. I really hope I get that diss
Buds night
2007-11-11 12:28:00
A productive day, for once. It is becoming a rarity now, as the material we are given is currently of little substance. These are the early days and so I am enjoying my head start, though aware of the risks of complacency. I have been writing up those long and diffuse PBL learning objectives. Turns out the scenario was based around Osteogenesis imperfecta, and the fact this was not mentioned in the PBL is what I would put down to those poor objectives we ended up with.Still, I have been taken aback to my BSc days, using the NCBI resources and PubMed to find relevant and undoubtedly reliable information from scientific papers such as the Lancet. That'll make a change to the usual Wikipedic references from the rest of the group. I do enjoy reading up on the scientific basis for disease, and now I've bored as I am left to do the other sociological-based learning objectives. I know that the rest of my PBL group will focus almost entirely upon those points, as they aren't as confident
Making an impression
2007-11-09 05:47:00
We arrive at the GP surgery for our very first placement, the doctor is a pleasant, self-proclaimed introvert who made us all feel very welcome. We go through the ground rules of the placement which are all fairly obvious. The session then starts properly with some basic counselling-reflective exercises.From what I gathered, the affable Asian GP started by asking:"Okay, so firstly I want you all to write down a few sentences on your favourite T-shirt. Say whatever you like, be descriptive, just jot down a few sentences as to why this is the case"I sit there blankly staring at my pad. I know the one I like, it's the one I'd forgotten to bring to uni with me as I was wearing it the day I packed, then put it in the wash and forgot about it.I note down a few details - "Nice brown colour, cheap, very soft on the skin, from America but you wouldn't think it from looking at it. Edges are slightly creased and been pulled a bit out of shape as I slept in it"I wait for the others
The Eternal Optimist
2007-11-09 04:45:00
Breaking from the gain, and realising that I have been serially bitching about everything that pisses me off on a daily basis I felt it was time for a brief hiatus on the pessimism. Enjoy.1. Spaghetti Bolognaise for dinner, 3 times a week.It may be one of the few meals I actually can cook properly, but I have perfected my recipe and technique and now enjoy my favourite food every week, several times a week.2. My courseI may vent about it on my blog, but the truth is it has its moments, it can be very interesting and I can't imagine myself doing anything else. Plus my old uni mates are very jealous and always asking about it.3. Wintertime Live for winter, the cold sharp frost on my face in the morning, wrapping up all cosy in bed at night. The same naive excitement for the run up to Christmas and the pigging out. I may not be going on holiday to somewhere like the picture, but my home town ain't half bad for crimbo.4. Geek Chic Med students are by default geeks, myself included (accor
Read more: Eternal
Christmas time, dismissal, woe and whine
2007-11-08 10:58:00
Its been a strange week, nothing seems to have happened yet the reality is quite to the contrary. Like I said strange, huh?There are a few things I have not been able to get my head around. Firstly and my main complaint has to be the aggressive generic letters I have received. One from the TV licensing company telling me to "cough up or else' or alternatively if I don't have a TV (which I don't) I should inform them by ringing their premium rate number. Fuck off will I, they can waste their money sending more generic letters that I'll ignore.Secondly the "Dear Resident' letter I received from the beloved site manager team, yes those fuckers. They have decided to tell me to stop smoking cigarettes, cigars, pipes and hookah (which they informed me is another word for shisha). I don't particularly care if the other students covertly smoke out of their bedroom windows, but I don't appreciate the site manager team's indiscriminate approach to heckling the non-smokers.I w
Read more: Christmas
, dismissal
One more time for the PB Hell of it
2007-11-06 12:07:00
Want to know what the best part of the week is?Tuesday afternoon, right after PBL has finished. That marks the longest possible time before the next PBL session. I am fairly critical of PBL, and perhaps this post comes as no surprise but I would like to reiterate the main problems I have with it.For one, the sessions are timetabled to last two full hours although we have never exceeded 1hr 15mins. I am of course very happy about that, but at the end of the day if we're only doing a half arsed job of it (and for some reason receiving decent marks) then the logical outcome is half-educated doctors, right?Well, in all honesty what goes on in the PBL discussions is hardly enlightening nor is it particularly engaging. This is not a criticism of my group, but there is very little for me to gain from hearing other students repeat the same material I have researched. I am probably a little dismissive of others attitudes or opinions with regards to the scenarios we are given, perhaps I'm ig
Rock On
2007-11-04 13:23:00
If there's one good thing about medicine, it's the seemingly endless list of cool band names on offer:EpiglottisKaryotypeBlastocystMesodermSplanchnic ganglionThe AnticodonsDiencephalonZymogenThe Brachial grooveForamen magnumThe Okazaki fragmentsAnd my favourite…The Islets of Langerhans.
A little out of hand
2008-03-09 07:14:00
I’m loving the new PBL, especially the way it’s tailored to make it relevant to us.“Bartek is a 23 year old Polish labourer working on the Olympic site at Stratford. He is involved in an accident with a band saw which results in his right hand being completely severed 4cm proximal to the wrist.”Dare I say it; this one is actually quite interesting to read up on. Lots of journal articles with gory pictures:The new PBL tutor isn’t bad either, a seemingly nice lady and generous with the group mark - unlike our last tutor, though even they made sure we did the work. The past week has consisted of locomotor lectures, and for the most part dissection of the upper limb has proved extremely useful.Trying to remember the different nerve roots and palsies is giving me grief. What with the
Read more: little
What not to do...in your first year
2008-03-04 15:02:00
Telling everyone you’re a medical studentAs a first year, you are bottom of the pile. You’re not special like those finalists and you know fuck all medicine. If you try using it as a chat up line, you can bet the locals will have heard it before.Telling everyone you’re going to be a surgeonOr obstetrician, or cardiologist, or gastroenterologist, or whatever. You can’t possibly know at this stage, and naming some glamorous-sounding specialty does not give you credibility. By all means start thinking of possible career choices, but keep it to yourself for the next five years.Buying a stethoscopeIt depends on your school, but by and large there is little need for a stethoscope in the first year. Certainly, if you do decide to buy a stethoscope then don’t be that guy with the obscene
Goin' loco
2008-03-02 10:57:00
Tomorrow marks the start of two new modules, one of which is supposedly the hardest element of the first year. Welcome to ‘brain and behaviour’ and ‘locomotion’. I’ve heard dreadful, awful things about B+B, alas, I am actually looking forwards to it. In biomed, neuroscience was one of my favourite topics we covered. As for locomotor, the dissection SSM I’ve just done should prove extremely useful. Of course, returning to the usual daily grind makes for an unwelcome return of PBL.I went to one of the best union nights so far last Friday – live bands night. Both cheap and relaxed, I really enjoyed watching students putting on a good show, the appreciation and unity of the crowd was electric. I’m definitely going to guitar soc this week, I’ve been meaning to for a long while
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