Owner: Life in the Corner URL:http://lifeinthecorner.blogspot.com Join Date: Tue, 22 Aug 2006 13:29:41 -0500 Rating:1 Site Description: A humorous account of life through the eyes of a 3 year old, who is spending more and more of his time in the naughty corner! Site statistics:Click here
Tagged 2006-10-20 09:52:00 Yesterday's corner time: 3 Minutes.
There was an incident last week, which I haven't yet mentioned. Once again, I became lost at Chessington World of Adventures.
Mum was walking along chatting to her friend and I stopped to look at a stone on the floor. I thought that this would be a perfect addition to my collection. However, on looking up, Mum was nowhere in sight.
Therefore, I did what any sensible three year old would do. I turned around and walked in completely the opposite direction.
Meanwhile, Mum was frantically looking for me and after 15 minutes, contacted Park Security. Eventually, I was found and was fortunately reunited with my Mum and less fortunately, with Becca also.
The reason why I mention this now is that as a result, I have been tagged. Electronically tagged.
Severe you might think and possibly an infringement of human liberties but not according to my Dad. He believes this will help increase his life expectancy and reduce the number of heart stopping moments.
Read more:Tagged
Soldier 2006-10-17 09:48:00 Yesterday's corner time: 1 Minute.
We went to visit Windsor Castle on Sunday, so that I could see some real soldiers.
Security was pretty tight at the entrance but I still managed to smuggle in my plastic sword.
I even managed to sneak it past the sniffer dogs but I think the contents of Becca's nappy may have de-sensitized them. One poor Cocker-Spaniel obviously inhaled a little too deeply when checking her, causing it to reel backwards, eyes watering and spluttering.
It wasn't too long before I spied my first sentry, guarding one of the gates to the Queen's residence. He stood very still, holding a special gun with a sharp knife on the top against his shoulder. I'll have to add one of these to my Christmas list.
Anyway, I strolled casually up to him and enquired as to how his day was proceeding but he didn't respond. Ok, perhaps he hadn't heard me, so I shouted it. Still no response. How rude. I was just about to clout him across the shins with my sword when, luckily fo
Countdown 2006-10-10 09:27:00 Yesterday's Corner Time: 4 Minutes.
I snuck into Dad's office yesterday and hid his daily countdown to my Outward bound course, which was at 2187. Ha! Let's see how he manages without that!
I was disappointed to see that he had anticipated this move and had three backup copies locked away in a drawer. Not only that but I also discovered that he has an electronic version stored on his PC, which pops up a happy little reminder each time he signs on and is programmed to sound a fanfare on the passing of each week.
I went to complain to Mum and she was absolutely furious. She stormed upstairs to his office and demanded to know what was he thinking? How could he be so inconsiderate? And why hadn't she been given a copy of the electronic version?
Hmm, not quite the reaction I had expected.
I thought I'd cheer myself up by spending time with someone less fortunate than me and went in search of Becca.
Becca is becoming more annoying with each passing day. Just when I think she's re Read more:Countdown
Outward Bound 2006-10-06 09:34:00 Yesterday's Corner Time: 6 Minutes.
In the morning, I had to visit a school with my parents. I'm not quite sure why but they kept asking me if I liked it. They don't normally ask my opinion but they seemed very keen to do so yesterday, which was nice of them.
Thinking about it, I appear to be spending a lot more time at pre-school nowadays. I always seem to be going. I don't really have a good concept of time but I'm sure that I'm attending far more often than before.
I think this may be part of a larger conspiracy by my parents to get rid of me. The Head Teacher of the school yesterday described how the older kids go away for a week's outward bound course. I overheard Dad whispering to Mum that he couldn't wait and that it was only six years away. He was quite excited.
In the afternoon, as it was raining, we visited an indoor play area and met up with Emily.
I was running around so much that I became very, very sweaty. So sweaty in fact that Mum decided to swap my trac Read more:Bound
Composition 2006-10-03 09:24:00 Yesterday's Corner Time: 2 Minutes.
I'm not quite sure of the exact timeline but I think it goes something like this:
First there came Baby Mozart. Then there was Big Mozart. Sometime after that came a couple of chaps called Lennon and McCartney. They were in the Beatles. I like Beatles but I prefer spiders.
Anyway, I digress. I'm not quite sure what that means but Dad says I do it a lot. I think I might be doing it again right now. I just can't help myself. Any available opportunity and off I go, digressing.
Anyway, before I do it again, the Beatles wrote some good songs as did Baby Mozart. Big Mozart was alright but not really my cup of tea.
Well, I've now followed in their footsteps and penned my first composition. I'm quite proud of it and I don't think I'd be exaggerating too much if I referred to it as a masterpiece.
Admittedly, some of the imagery could be considered to be basic and I've repeated some of the verses but all in all, I think it demonstrates my gen Read more:Composition
Nectar 2006-09-27 10:27:00 Yesterday's Corner Time: 4 Minutes.
As I get older, my palate is definitely becoming more sophisticated and I'm developing a distinct ability to detect the complex flavours that constitute most of my meals.
I am also able to identify which ingredients work well together and to recommend combinations that will bring out the best of each of the individual components.
Through exhaustive experimentation and numerous tastings, I have developed an extensive, encyclopaedic knowledge of cooking and I can now be quite bold with some of my culinary creations.
Virtually all of my dishes revolve around one secret ingredient - Custard.
I've yet to find a bad pairing involving this nectar like substance. My favourite is fruit smothered with Custard. To be honest, I'm not too fond of the fruit bits but it's easy to push them out of the way and it acts as a good delivery mechanism for the Custard.
Becca actually prefers strawberries. When being offered one, she tends to open her mouth Read more:Nectar
Moving Away 2006-09-25 10:58:00 Yesterday's Corner Time: 3 Minutes.
On Friday, I went to Chessington World of Adventures again with Emily. Call me picky if you like but I've been less inclined to meet up with her ever since she accused me of smelling of pooh.
The morning went well but at lunch time, she delivered some devastating news. She's moving 600 miles away to Scotland.
I couldn't believe that I smelled so badly to warrant such a drastic measure. I immediately tried to reassure her that I had dispensed with dousing myself with Dad's aftershave and instead preferred going au naturale.
She wasn't too impressed by this revelation but she shared that the decision to up sticks was less to do with my bodily odours and more to do with her parents desire to live somewhere full of Scottish people.
Emily said that I can go and visit but I'm not sure long distance relationships work. It was bad enough when she lived on the other side of town, let alone in another country.
I think that her Dad might actually Read more:Moving
Wipeout 2006-09-20 10:08:00 Yesterday's corner time: 4 Minutes.
Becca is turning out to be quite accident prone. Especially, it seems, when she's in my presence.
Take yesterday for example, when we were both out in the garden playing. I was on my rope swing and she was pootling around doing whatever she does, when she inadvertently wandered into my path.
Naturally, as I was in mid-swing there was very little I could do and I slammed into her back, wiping her out.
Although slightly winded and with a mouthful of play bark, Becca was quickly back up on her feet but unfortunately, she was just in time for my return swing. This time, I caught her under her chin, lifting her clean off her feet.
Becca's screams filled the local neighbourhood like an air raid siren. Mum came running and I immediately protested my innocence. I tend to do this now even when it's nothing to do with me.
Luckily, she had heard my warning shouts to Becca and so believed my claims that it was all a terrible accident.
This has me wonderi Read more:Wipeout
Chef 2006-09-18 10:06:00 Yesterday's corner time: 2 Minutes.
Dad spent a lot Saturday cooking. Yes, that's right, cooking. Yes, I do know what cooking is and Dad was doing quite a lot of it on Saturday.
Apparently, he has been known to do this before, although not during my lifetime, so this was a first for me. I pulled up a chair and watched in amazement as he dashed around the kitchen in something which he referred to as "Organized Chaos" but which Mum said was more akin to "Disorganized Chaos". Dad has long been a supporter of chaos theory and here it was demonstrated perfectly.
Dad describes his culinary genius as Cordon Bleu but Mum suggested that it was probably more Cordon Noir judging by the charred remains in most of the dishes.
Despite my protests, Mum just left him to it. I wasn't sure if our kitchen would ever look the same again. I don't think she could bear to watch. Eventually, even I had to leave and retire to a safe distance. I decided that behind the sofa was the best bet.
Unc
Ear we go again 2006-09-14 13:49:00 Yesterday's corner time: 3 Minutes.
Dad had a frog in his throat yesterday, although I couldn't see anything and I'm not quite sure how it got there. I assume that he was sitting watching TV with his mouth wide open as usual and that it hopped right in.
I guess he was lucky that it was only a frog and not something larger, such as small dog. However, I think that a dog would only have squeezed in if he were yawning at the time.
The dog would also have had to escape the clutches of Becca, animal lover extraordinaire. She has a tendency to first lure them into a false sense of security by gently stroking their head and patting their back before attempting to rip their ears off.
Becca seems to have a penchant for ears at the moment and unfortunately, not just those of the canine variety. She is also particularly partial to mine, which is quite upsetting.
It's not that my ears are especially big because they're not. Well, at least they weren't before Becca started to tug on th
Relaxed 2006-11-17 11:31:00 Yesterday's corner time: 4 Minutes. Thanks everyone who left a message enquiring where I've been. It' s nice to be actually missed for once. So, where have I been? I've been hiding upstairs, underneath my bed for four weeks after my Dad suggested we play a game of Hide and Seek. I eventually gave up all hope of being found and traipsed downstairs into the lounge, only to find both Mum and Dad, with their feet up, sipping cocktails and looking very relaxed. "There you are! Found you! I'll count to 100 and you go and hide again." said Dad. I was just about to tell Dad what he could do with his game of hide and seek, when I was knocked violently sideways as Becca sped past on my red sports car.
She pulled to a rest, dismounted, grabbed her tropical fruit juice and sank back into her miniature deck chair without even giving me a sideways glance. Et tu Becca.
It appears that things have been allowed to slip in my absence.
Matthew. Read more:Relaxed
Snowbiz 2006-11-28 09:36:00 Yesterday's corner time: 0 Minutes.
I'm on my best behaviour at the moment because apparently, Father Christmas is watching and he doesn't look favourably upon little boys torturing their even littler sisters. I'm also a little concerned that he may reject many of the items on my Christmas list:
1) New Sword - Becca's head has bent my current one.2) Chainsaw - Let's see her head dent this.3) Axe - Just in case.4) Train set.5) Spiderman outfit.
I've just landed the plum role of third snowflake in my pre-school nativity play. I did have a plan for an unfortunate accident to befall snowflakes 1 and 2 thereby improving my snowflake ranking but I decided to put it in on hold, just in case Father Christmas might notice.
Initially, I tried to completely immerse myself in my role, drawing upon past experiences and emotions in order to bring some real depth to the part. I shed my Matthew persona and actually became Snowflake No. 3.
This meant that I had to be very quiet and fl
Au Revoir 2006-11-30 10:07:00 Yesterday's corner time: 4 Minutes.
Emily has now moved to Scotland. Needless to say, I'm completely devastated. It took at least half an hour and the prospect of some custard to snap me out of my longest bout of depression to date.
Dad said Emily's going to live with the Loch Ness Monster but I've always found her Mother to be quite nice. Dad also said that it wasn't really goodbye, just Au Revoir.
As we were talking Au Revoir, I thought I should give Emily a French kiss. I wasn't quite sure how to perform one of these but I knew that it involved using tongues. So, I licked Emily all over her face.
I think she was impressed but it was hard to tell as she kept trying to bat me away. She's certainly a feisty one and as she tried to make her escape, I managed to leap on her back, eventually wrestling her to the floor. But, before I could kiss her again, she managed to wriggle free and ran screaming into the kitchen.
Hmm, the lady doth protest too much, methinks.
Nanna says
Music Group 2006-12-07 11:20:00 Yesterday's corner time: 9 Minutes.
Dad took the morning off work and took Becca and me to music group.
Unfortunately, I think I may have ruined any chances that I may have had of receiving some Christmas presents this year after I attacked Father Christmas.
Actually, it wasn't really Father Christmas at all but a man dressed up to look like him. My suspicions were first aroused when he was unable to name all of Santa's reindeers but they were most definitely confirmed when his beard fell off.
"Hey! It's not really Father Christmas! It's, it's an impostor. Everybody, get him!" screamed my Dad.
I didn't need inviting twice. In fact, I don't normally need inviting once but it always helps.
Later on, in a retrospective mood, Dad explained how it's deemed socially unacceptable to do what we did unless you're a professional wrestler. And even then, it's still only acceptable if actually in a wrestling match at the time.
Apparently, it's completely unacceptable to Read more:Music
, Group
Jack Brown 2007-03-27 16:22:00 I've got a new friend. He doesn't know me and I don't really know him but that doesn't matter. He's still managed to touch the lives of my family.
His name is Jack and he's very ill. My Dad says he looks a bit like me which seems to really upset him.
I'm slightly concerned why looking like me would upset anyone really.
Anyway, apart from his good looks, Jack is amazingly brave too. I admire him greatly. I hope one day we can meet and play.
Until that day, I'll have to make do with visiting him at http://www.jackbrownappeal.org/index.asp.
Good Luck Jack.
Matthew. Read more:Brown
Gloating 2006-08-25 10:14:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 8 Minutes.I’m getting rather fed up of Becca gloating whenever I’m in the corner. I get put in the corner for whacking her. She gloats at me. I whack her again which results in even more corner time. She then gloats some more and so on. Dad says it’s a vicious circle. After his revelation the other day about plants that attack, I’m more than slightly disturbed to discover that geometry also has its nasty side. What about the other shapes? Can rectangles be spiteful? Can squares be cruel? I like the sound of love triangles though.For the time being, I think I’ll stick with astronomy. Mum and Dad have stuck some fluorescent stars and planets on my bedroom ceiling and they glow at night when I’m going to sleep.I heard on the news today that after several weeks of discussions, a group of world renowned astronomers have finally reached a consensus and agree that Pluto is not actually a planet. Of course Pluto isn’t a planet, he’s a dog! I thought t
GPS 2006-08-23 09:53:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 4 Minutes.We actually missed our ferry back to England on our return from France.Dad has recently bought one of these new global positioning systems which allow him to pinpoint his exact location anywhere in the world.I don’t know why he just doesn’t ask me, as I’m generally sat directly behind him and can tell him precisely where he is, which is normally in the front seat of our car. Sometimes, I think he just buys gadgets for the sheer sake of it.So, it was surprising when six minutes 40 seconds away from the port of Calais, Dad took a wrong turning onto a toll road bearing towards Paris. This unplanned detour added an extra 40 minutes to our journey time, resulting in our missed departure.For some unknown reason, Dad believed that I was responsible for this deviation. I’m not sure why I should be blamed for us heading off in the wrong direction, especially when he has state of the art technology guiding him.Was I bombarding him with senseless quest Read more:GPS
Here, There and Everywhere 2006-08-01 09:54:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 4 Minutes.Becca is everywhere. She’s an omnipotent being.Wherever I go, she follows behind me like a poodle. Well, that is if poodles walked upright, with their paws outstretched like a zombie from the night of the living dead. She doesn’t really have curly hair or a wet nose either but she is smelly and she does have questionable toilet habits. So, I think the comparison is still valid.Anyway, she tags along and there’s no escape. As I still can’t reach the “Art of War”, I decided that I should approach the problem logically and methodically.With some limited experimentation, I have tested the boundaries of her agility and identified that she does have issues avoiding certain obstacles, especially those which suddenly appear from out of nowhere.My initial studies commenced simply with the scattering of everyday objects on the lounge floor. Drawing pins were particularly effective at slowing her relentless progress but eventually, she learnt to br
Pitter Patter 2006-07-31 13:35:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 5 Minutes.It was a weekend of mixed emotions - some of which were very confusing.I think my friend Max may fancy Becca. He’s completely besotted by her womanly charms and refuses to play with me anymore, preferring instead to hold her hand all the time.This is completely unacceptable. What is he thinking - she’s only half his age. Is he having a mid-life crisis at three years old? He’ll be driving a convertible go-cart next and getting his ears pierced. I just hope he snaps out of it soon - I want my friend back.Becca is certainly sneaky – she keeps finding new and perverse ways of irritating me. If stealing my friend wasn’t bad enough, then she has now also started to walk.In some respects, this is exciting as I can now chase her and push her over. However, on the other hand, I’ve lost my primary mode of transport.I’ve tried to encourage her to crawl again, so that I can hop onto her back but she seems physically incapable of bending any more.
Bubbly 2006-07-12 09:29:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 5 Minutes.Yesterday morning, I filled Becca’s drinking cup with bubble liquid.She drank the entire contents before being violently sick and then continued to burp bubbles for the remainder of the day.Through trial and error, I discovered that I could control both the size and the frequency of the bubbles by applying differing degrees of pressure to her abdomen.Experiments to make them emerge from her ears failed. As soon as I held both her mouth and nose shut, she objected so strongly that it drew Mum’s attention.Once I was let back out of the corner, I was allowed to help Mum open the post.Unfortunately, one of the letters contained a restraining order from Emily’s lawyers.This was a disappointing development. Perhaps, it had been terror after all that I had seen in her eyes. I really need to learn to differentiate as it’s having a dramatic impact on my love life.However, I’m ever the eternal optimist and believe that true love can conquer all, alt
Fun Fayre 2006-07-10 09:27:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 0 MinutesI’ve been very good since the demolition but I’m not sure for how much longer I can continue to remain out of trouble.On Saturday, we went to a local medieval fayre.Mum said that medieval means a long time ago but sometime after the dark ages. It’s dark for ages every night, so I think medieval must mean some point in the morning, probably just before lunch time.The fayre was full of people dressed up in odd outfits, including some chap who was wearing a sack. Either the people around there were a bit strange or they could definitely benefit from a visit to Gap.There was a good jousting ride, where I got to sit in a bobsled type contraption at the top of a long ramp. I had a sword thrust into my hand and was told to whack the mannequins on either side of the track as I flew down. I didn’t know what a mannequin was, so I just clouted the attendants instead.Dad called me Medieval Knieval for the rest of the day.There was also a falconry event,
A Whiter Shade of Pale 2006-07-03 09:34:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 6 Minutes.Hi, I’m back.I think it was within 30 minutes of returning that I was re-acquainted with my naughty corner. It was good to be home.On the plane trip out, Dad told me we were going to the South East Corner of Corsica. Two weeks in a corner? Call that a holiday? I do that for a living.However, it turned out that this was a really big corner with a villa, beaches and towns. Now, that’s what I call a corner.Unfortunately, it soon materialized that this larger corner contained several smaller ones into which I could be placed.We spent much of our time at the coast. The beaches in Corsica were fantastic and both Becca and I really enjoyed them. I enjoyed building sand castles and Becca enjoyed eating the sand. There is a huge difference in our levels of sophistication.According to Dad, Becca digested so much silicon during our holiday that she definitely won’t need any implants when she’s older.It was very hot at the beach and my parents were natu Read more:Whiter
, Shade
Infatuation 2006-05-24 10:09:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 7 Minutes.I think I’m in love and it’s having a positive effect on my corner time.A new girl has started at my nursery school. She’s called Jane and every time she comes near me, I become flustered and tongue tied. This is generally followed by me doing something incredibly stupid to avoid any embarrassing silences.However, this hasn’t stopped me from trying to win her affections.So far, I’ve tried the subtle approach – running around screaming with my pants on my head.I’ve also tried the direct approach – putting her in a headlock and smothering her with kisses.Neither seems to have impressed her. Girls are so complex.Yesterday, she sat next to me at lunch and I could feel the butterflies in my stomach. I knew that I shouldn't have eaten them but there had been another awkward pause in the conversation.Dad suggested that I should try being sweeter and sweep her off her feet. So, I covered myself in sugar and whacked her with a broom. She bur Read more:Infatuation
Evel or Evil? 2006-05-23 09:12:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 35 Minutes.The Post Office called in the morning and requested that we either collect Becca from their depot or pay the excess charge to ship her to Peru.Unfortunately, Mum took the call, so we had to go collect her.Although he hadn’t managed to apprehend me this time, I think Dad was secretly pleased that he had been right - 20 x 1st class stamps wasn’t enough and the mail service does have more frequent collections on a Monday.In the afternoon, it was raining and once I had been let out of the corner, I was allowed to bring my tricycle indoors.I promptly turned the ground floor of our house into a Formula 1 Grand Prix circuit, racing around like a complete lunatic.Unfortunately, my tricycle doesn’t have any brakes, so I had to stop by crashing into things such as chairs, doors, Becca and Grandad John.Admittedly, I had to take a minor detour to get Becca as she was sleeping on the sofa at the time. Mum found her lying on the floor with a wet tyre mark
Playhouse 2006-05-15 09:44:00 Yesterday’s corner time: 18 Minutes.My parents bought a wooden playhouse for the garden. Unfortunately, this came as a flat pack with an estimated build time of 3 hours. If you’ve read my D.I.Y. posting, then you will understand that this was going to get ugly.At least two people were required to put the house together. So, I got my trusty toolbox and was ready and willing to assist.At first, the mood was quite jovial with Dad joking that this was to be my new home but within an hour, not only had I received 2 lots of corner time but I had also been completely banished from the garden.Admittedly, I probably didn’t react too well when Dad refused to share his power tools with me. It seems to be one set of rules for him and a different set for me. However, I think the final straw came when I filled his precious toolbox with sand. I was promptly marched inside and told that my help was no longer required.However, it turned out that my help was suddenly good enough after Dad had stup
I Am Gladiator 2006-05-05 10:12:00 Yesterday's corner time: 23 Minutes.Every now and then, I just can't stop being naughty. I can't help myself. I run riot.Yesterday was one of those days. I was put in the corner 10 times. Parental quote of the day No. 7: "I'm going to shave off all his hair and find those three sixes!"Again, my Father is partially to blame. He bought me a roman soldier outfit. At first I didn't know what the sword was for - I thought it was for hitting bees (I don't like bees).So, my Dad showed me Gladiator
.I never looked back: I decapitated all the flowers in the back garden.I clouted Becca.I decapitated all the flowers in the front garden.I clouted Becca.I tried to harpoon our tropical fish.I clouted Becca.I bruised the shins of any passing adult.I clouted Becca.I gave next door's cat the fright of its life.I whacked Grandad John on the back of his head. Grandad has two walking sticks, so I thought this was a fair fight, although he was sleeping at the time.The sword was confiscated. Mum quest
Entente Cordiale 2006-05-02 08:14:00 Yesterday's corner time: 4 Minutes.My first time in a foreign corner. It gave me an idea for a new feature which I may introduce to my blog at some point - Guest Corners.Yesterday, we all went to France for the Day. My Dad likes to organize these trips so that we have an opportunity to immerse ourselves in a foreign culture. Although, as far as I can make out, these trips are less about French culture and more about ogling the women and buying huge quantities of French Wine.After shopping and a long lunch we went for a walk around the old town of Boulogne. I discovered that if I donned my Dad's sunglasses and postured behind groups of French women, they giggled hysterically.Parental quote of the day no. 5: "I don't believe it - my 2.5 year old son has already made more progress with French women than I have in my entire life."Seeing the success that I was having, my Dad snatched back his sunglasses and started to prance around like a fool. Within 5 minutes he had been arrested by th
Sharing 2006-04-14 10:08:00 Yesterday's corner time: 6 Minutes.I went around to Alfie's house yesterday for an Easter Egg Hunt.Alfie's my friend and is the same age. He has a younger sister too, so we're kindred spirits.It was a gloriously sunny day and I cleaned up in all the hunts.I also won the Egg and Spoon Race. At first, I thought this was going to be a race between an Egg and Spoon but it turned out to be quite different and a lot more fun. Although, I think the Egg would have won, especially if the course had had a slight downward slope. Alfie disagreed and we ended up having a minor altercation resulting in some corner time.Anyway, at the end, because I had so many more eggs than the other kids, I was made to share mine out. What is this sharing business? It's like a tax on being successful. It's like communism for kids.When I got home, I googled Marx who apparently had a lot to say on this kinda stuff. Turns out that he was quite a funny guy. He also appears to have had a few brothers: Chico, Harp Read more:Sharing
Trampoline 2007-06-11 08:13:00 It was my fourth Birthday over the weekend. It won’t be long now before I can drive.Dad says that I already drive him around the bend but I want to be able to drive him a little bit further than that. Perhaps, over that edge that he’s always referring to.I thought being four would mean that I would be bigger and stronger but having looked in the mirror, it doesn’t appear that much has changed. This is very disappointing.However, the disappointment was short lived and soon dissipated on receipt of my main present – a huge trampoline. This made me very happy.I’m not too sure that our neighbours are as happy, as any semblance of privacy that they may have maintained has now vanished as my head repeatedly bobs above their hedge.I’ve tried to engage them in polite conversation mid-bob but these tend to be disjointed and breathless affairs as I’m continually disappearing from view, as gravity takes its inevitable toll.The safety net has yet to arrive which means that if I time Read more:Trampoline
Devon Can Wait 2007-06-18 10:18:00 I think I got confused somewhere along the line. It’s easily done. We had just returned from London and I was recounting the day’s events to Nanna.We had been to see Big Ben and Trafalgar Square where there was a large statue called Nelson’s Column. This is now offically my favourite statue.I relayed my understanding of Admiral Nelson’s demise to Nanna, as Dad told it to me. Apparently, Nelson had been sailing on a big boat when he was shot. This hurt quite a bit and he had to lie down. Shortly afterwards, he went to Devon
. Apparently, this is where everyone goes after they are shot.I was greatly disturbed by this relevation, as I know that we are planning to rent a cottage in Devon for our holidays. Therefore, it was a great relief when Nanna said that Dad had probably meant Heaven because, as far as I know, we have no plans to vacation there anytime soon. Phew.Matthew.
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