Owner: Completely Aimless URL:http://www.completelyaimless.com Join Date: Sat, 09 Aug 2008 13:37:36 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: Completely aimless humor about today's world. Site statistics:Click here
Get the garlic! 2008-08-09 12:29:55 They might rise again, walking the earth to feed. Yet another sign of the apocalypse.
I love this picture. 2008-08-09 02:12:59 I'd be making that face too if Nancy Pelosi stuck her finger up my ass.
Ever sit down... 2008-08-09 02:10:29 ...in the car too fast, and squish a testicle? God damn that hurts. We need a term for that.
2008 Olympics 2008-08-09 02:07:13 I hear there is a ton of Asian chicks there!They're hiding in whatever the fuck this thing is.Go get'em boys. Read more:Olympics
Little Johnny joke of the day - 8/24/2008 2008-08-24 01:12:00 Little Lucy was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class.One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, Lucy, who created the universe?" When Lucy didn't stir, Little Johnny
, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear."God Almighty! " shouted Lucy and the teacher said, "Very good," and Lucy fell back Read more:Little Johnny
Anti Chuck Norris fact of the day - 8/22/2008 2008-08-22 19:11:00 Chuck Norris
puts forth so much effort during a Total Gym demonstration that he actually shits his pants. Depends has been trying to get him to endorse their adult diapers for years.
Read more:Chuck
Obama VP Announcement!!! 2008-08-22 11:22:00 The nation waits impatiently for Barack Obama
to announce his running mate. Ah yes, the vice president. The guy in the White House who's only effective job is the President of the Senate, a job by the way that is incredibly rarely utilized.This all feels like a bullshit publicity stunt that a boy band would pull... Keep listening for where the next in-store appearance might be... Ridiculous.I'l Read more:Announcement
Little Johnny joke of the day - 8/22/2008 2008-08-22 01:12:00 Little Johnny
's mother decided to give her son an anatomy lesson one day, so she took off all of her clothes and pointed to her vagina, saying, "Johnny, this is where you came from."Johnny went to school the next day smiling and insisting that all his friends now refer to him as "Lucky Johnny.""Why?" one asked.Johnny held his fingers an inch apart and said, "Because I came this close to being a t Read more:Little Johnny
Michael Phelps: Maybe I'm missing something... 2008-08-21 08:22:00 ...but isn't there something
just a little gay about this picture of MichaelPhelps
on the cover of SI?Before you start getting shitty with me, I just said a little gay, I didn't say super gay, like the image below.
Read more:Maybe
Little Johnny joke of the day - 8/21/2008 2008-08-21 06:10:00 Little Johnny
wanted to walk his dog, so he asked his mom if he could."Well, you better go ask your dad, because she is in heat, and he can help you out." said his mom.Little Johnny
went out to the garage and found his dad. Where he asked, "Dad, can I take the dog for a walk? Mom said you could help me out because she is in heat.""Sure you can son," he replied. "Just bring her over here first, and
Little Johnny joke of the day - 8/20/2008 2008-08-20 11:05:00 Little Johnny
was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, "I've lost my grandpa"The cop asked, "What's he like?"Little Johnny
replied, "Jack Daniels and women with big tits"
Things I do when I'm bored as hell 2008-08-20 06:30:00 I get bored a lot. I think it's due to my extra long attention span, and well, there's just not that much shit to pay attention to. Here's a short list of things that I do when I'm bored to tears. If you've never done any of these things, it probably means that you're a well adjusted human being, and therefore, probably shouldn't be reading gibberish like this lest you become tainted.Google ran
Anti Chuck Norris fact of the day - 8/19/2008 2008-08-19 23:04:00 Chuck Norris
once sent himself flowers on Valentine's Day to trick people into thinking he had a girlfriend. Too bad he signed the card, "From Chuck Norris."
Read more:Chuck
Little Johnny joke of the day - 8/19/2008 2008-08-19 23:01:00 Little Johnny
is sitting in a biology class,and the teacher says that an interesting phenomenon of nature is that only humans stutter, no other animal in the world does this.Johnny's hand shoots up. "Not correct, Miss!" he says."Please explain, Johnny," replies the teacher."Well, Miss, the other day I was playing with my cat on the verandah. The neighbors' Great Dane came around the corner, and my Read more:Little Johnny
Comedy Central Roast of Bob Saget 2008-08-19 21:05:00 In case you missed it, the roast of Bob Saget aired on ComedyCentral
on Sunday, August 17th. Having watched all of the previous roasts on Comedy Central, I naturally had to tune in. One thing I can tell you is that I can't wait for the uncut airing of it. Censorship just does not do these justice.If you're about my age, you of course remember Bob Saget as the dad from "Full House", a completel Read more:Roast
Bush joke of the day - 8/18/2008 2008-08-18 10:03:00 A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.He asked, "What are all those clocks?"St.Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.""Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?""That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating
Little Johnny joke of the day - 8/18/2008 2008-08-18 08:44:00 Little Johnny
told his teacher he’d found a cat. She asked him if it was dead or alive."Dead." She was informed."How do you know?" she asked her pupil."Because I pissed in its ear and it didn’t move," answered the child innocently."You did WHAT?!?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise."You know," explained Little Johnny
, "I leaned over and went ’Pssst!’ and it didn’t move."
Anti Chuck Norris fact of the day - 8/18/2008 2008-08-18 00:15:00 As a teen, ChuckNorris
impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later, the nuns gave birth to the 1976 Buccaneers, the worst team in NFL history, finishing their season 0-14 and losing by an average of 20 points per game. They were also shut out five times that season.
Little Johnny joke of the day - 8/17/2008 2008-08-17 16:17:00 Little Johnny
walks into his parents room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts. Worried about what her son has seen she dress’s quickly and goes to find him.Little Johnny
sees his mom and asks "What were you and dad doing?"The mother replies "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatte
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