Owner: Slacker-moms-r-us URL:http://slacker-moms-r-us.com/ Join Date: Fri, 18 Aug 2006 09:18:42 -0500 Rating:1 Site Description: I'm a slacker mommy of four. My house is a mess, my husband is sexually deprived, and my kids are obnoxious. I'm loving every bit of it! Site statistics:Click here
I'm still around 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Sorry I have been MIA. I've been consumed with the possibility of my children's beloved school closing. We are putting together a plan of action that is draining most of my mental energy. I do feel optimistic that our school will survive this and actually be stronger because of it. The loving testimonies and committment from parents and teachers at our last meeting was very inspiring. I just feel like someone has taken away my favorite pillow and I probably won't get much sleep until I get it back.Have a great weekend and do me a favor and visit my friend Brony over at Parenting With Mental Illness. Yesterday was her 100th post which fell on the last day of mental health awareness week. She is hoping to use this as an opportunity to spread the word and demythtify mental illness. She has a borderline personality disorder like my mother but in a much milder sense. Reading her blog has helped me get into the mind of a borderline personality which helps me understand my mom's thought p
My wedding album 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Today is my ninth wedding
anniversary so I looked through my wedding album this morning, something I haven't done in YEARS. What a wonderful day. Best day of my life along with the births of my children. It was a very warm October day and everything went as planned except my flowers didn't make it onto the tables at the reception but I didn't let it bother me. I went into my wedding day with the thought process that I would not let anything ruin my day.I love this photo. My hubby has his thumb on my belly because I was 6 weeks pregnant. Our little secret and a funny story that I won't be able to tell our kids until they are grown and married. We had planned on having kids right away and figured our honeymoon would be the best time to start trying. Being the control freak that I am I manipulated my birth control pills so that when I stopped them ovulation would occur during our honeymoon. We stopped having sex the month before the wedding because we were living together and hubby th
My cool new renter 1970-01-01 00:59:59 My newest tenant is Ramblings of Maggie. She's a self professed coffee addict and has someone trying to kill her with E-coli laced spinach. Drop by her blog for a cup of coffee and let her know I sent you. Read more:renter
Morgen's Halloween Meme 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Neila tagged me with this It's A Blog Eat Blog World Halloween
Meme.I am tagging Tonya, Momish, Tabba, Pippajo, and Mrs. L for this meme.1. What's the scariest movie you've ever seen?I haven't seen many scary movies because they seem to haunt my mind long after they are over. All scary movies scare the begeezees out of me but the one that I can't get out of my head is Trilogy of Terror that I saw as a kid. The third story about the Zuni hunting fetish doll still haunts me to this day. The twisted mother daughter relationship is similar to my own. Not only does the doll scare me but the thought that maybe I wanted to finish my mom off like the character in the story does.2. What was your favorite Halloween Costume from childhood?That's easy. We didn't have much money so we either made up our own costumes or wore the cheap plastic ones from Walgreens. One year my sister and I wore Raggedy Ann and Andy costumes that my mom may have made. I can't remember. Maybe my sis remembers. Read more:Morgen
Diet lies, farts, and confessions 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Diet is going pretty well. I'm surprised by how tasty most of the Nutrisystem meals have been although I hated the banana spice muffins and the veggie sloppy joe was just okay. The chicken salad and tacos rock! The worst part of my diet is the toxic butt syndrome I'm getting from the food stinks! Pun intended. I don't know if it's from all the fiber or what but the gas that is leaking from my butt could kill a small country. It's so bad that my kids who normally think it's funny when mommy farts
asked me to refrain from farting while reading books before bed. I tried to hold them in but I had to let a few SBD's leak out and then I played dumb. It was not easy saying "I don't smell anything" with a straight face when my nostrils are on fire and my eyes are watering. Poor things!Oh, okay I have a confession. I just can't lie to my dear blogging friends. I have been cheating! Started with the bag of mini Oreo's. I counted out the nine I could have for 130 calories. I swear they Read more:confessions
Time To Diet 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Marigrace is almost 10 months old and I'm still carrying 15 pounds from my pregnancy. The sad thing is that I only gained 26 pounds during that pregnancy. What's my excuse? I'm lazy. I've become addicted to this damn 'puter. My blog and my business take up what little free time I have which isn't much so I neglect my kids. Marigrace crawls around my feet while I occasionally throw down a cracker or cookie. Sad. I treat my baby like a dog. My preschooler watches way too much t.v. and has learned to play by himself very well. I feel guilty but I'm a junkie and from 3pm until bedtime I'm my family's bitch. That's seven hours of no "me" time between the after school activities, homework, reading books, dinner, baths and of course hubby expects me to be open like the 7-11. But this isn't the point of this post. I'll "Oh woe is me" another time.I need to lose weight. I need to workout more than I do. Here's my plan: 1. I take a striptease fitness class that I love but it's on
My cool renter 1970-01-01 00:59:59 I've been so busy trying to come up with a pimp name that I forget to pimp my renter
The Opiate Of The Masses? She's married to a stud muffin and has a couple of kids. Her blog has a fun theme and it's funny too. She also has a food and shopping blog. She's a good read. Go check her out.
Rambling thoughts 1970-01-01 00:59:59 I don't have anything in particular to write about today so I'll bore you with my thoughts
and newsworthy tidbits.Financial problems with my kid's school is weighing heavy on my mind. Three of them attend a private catholic school. It's a very small school with approximately 280 students. In my opinion it is our area's best kept secret. The preschool is Montessori and the teachers are amazing. Class sizes are small. My oldest is moving up grades with a class of 13-14 students; seven boys and seven girls. The girls are very close and this has been such a blessing for her because she has Tourette's Syndrome. They knew her before she developed her tics so they are more accepting of her quirkiness. I have had to deal with a bully issue but it worked out okay and it's been a learning lesson for all of us. I'm worried because our enrollment has been down over the last five years and our 40 year old school is having financial trouble. We are not affiliated with a parish and the Sister Read more:Rambling
What's your pimp name? 1970-01-01 00:59:59 The web never ceases to amaze me. An entire site dedicated to pimping out pimps. If you are in the market for gold and diamond teeth or iced out jewelry then I've found a site for you. They will even generate your pimp name if you are not bright enough to come up with your own. I'm digging Devious Honey K. Slim although Devious Honey K. Chub fits me better. Professor Truth Bitch Smooth is another good one. Hubby likes Tricktickler Bitch Flava although on most days I'm Stealth Magic Kristie Gates. I'm Macktastic Bitch Slither or Ice Master Bitch Wicked when you piss me off and Ghetto Fabulous Bitch Dogg is just funny. I'm obviously having way too much fun with this like I have nothing to do. Laundry is out of control, house is a mess and my kids are being demanding. It has taken me a half hour just to type this little blurb because blogging with kids is exhausting!
A birthday celebration 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Motherhood Uncensored has a monthly blog exchange. This month is a series of debates on various mom-related issues such as elective c-sections, tv for kids, organic foods, and feminism. Normally I don't get into debates, it's just not my thing but I feel compelled to write about the elective c-section vs. vaginal birth debate. It seems to me that c-sections are always going to get a bad wrap. I have had four c-sections due to a uterine anomaly called a bicornuate. My uterus is heart shaped so I carry my babies in one of the "horns" or basically in half a uterus. There is a high rate of breech presentation with this anomaly because baby does not have enough room to turn. All four of mine were breech. My uterine anomaly was found during my first c-section. I was so disappointed going into the c-section. I felt that I had failed. I tried everything to get my daughter to turn the "right" way. I elevated my hips several times a day, rocked on all fours, and shined a flashlight under my be Read more:celebration
The Diet: Day One 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Today is the first day of my diet. I weigh 156.5 lbs which is up 2 lbs from Friday because I always manage to put weight on in preparation for a diet. I ate all weekend with reckless abandon. French fries, Long John Silvers, crab rangoon, oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, brownies, and lots of dark chocolate. I have no shame! I'm doing Nutrisystem this week because my SIL gave me what she had left from the last time she dieted. Next week I'll start Seattle Sutton. I like the idea of the food being fresh and the only thing I need to supplement is two glasses of milk daily.I had a small cheese omelet for breakfast and I snuck in the last oatmeal chocolate chip cookie. I tried to give it away but my son didn't want it and the baby doesn't have any teeth. My dog wanted it but it has chocolate so I had to eat it. How could I throw it away knowing there are children starving in Africa? One little cookie won't hurt. Will it?I had Nutrisystem chicken salad on Melba toast and apple slices fo Read more:Day One
I have a confession 1970-01-01 00:59:59 I keep my pregnancy test sticks. I had forgotten about all those little sticks stashed in the back of my bathroom cabinet until I ran across this post on Manic Mom's Mental Myriads blog. I, too was a pregnancy stick addict. I just had to know the minute I became pregnant and having had four babies and one miscarriage adds up to a lot of sticks. I even kept the negative ones so when I tried to get pregnant again, they would be a reference to what a negative looks like. I know, one line, not pregnant, two lines, pregnant but I would analyze them in different light and at every angle hoping to see the slightest pink or blue line. And those darn evaporation lines! They played with my head every time. I was an expert on what brand was the best, didn't have evaporation lines, and read the lowest amount of HCG. So I pulled them out of their dark hiding place and looked at them fondly. A bittersweet moment. They are a lovely reminder of conceiving my children. Such an exciting time, the re Read more:confession
Other Announcements 1970-01-01 00:59:59 When I had a miscarriage seven years ago I joked about sending out a card similar to this oneHow many times have you wished Hallmark had cards to announce a difficult time in your life with a little humor? Two really smart gals have put this fabulous idea into action. I can't believe it took so long for someone to do this. I love it! You can find these cards at Other Announcements.Your son just came out of the closet? Infertility issues? Divorce? Lost your job? They've got a card for you. I'm sending this one out after my tummy tuck and boob job (Don't judge me. I've gestated and lactated 4 babies. I just want everything back the way it was. Diet and exercise is not cutting it!)My food for thought will be up shortly.
Another addiction! 1970-01-01 00:59:59 I'm addicted to Africam and I blame Karen from Troll Baby. I've just spent the last 45 minutes watching and I've seen quite a bit. I caught daybreak when the animals come out to eat. I've seen a baboon or chimpanzee mother(I don't know my primates very well)and her baby. The mother sat and watched as her baby ran around or picked bugs out of momma's hair. A huge herd of rams came up to feed and two males were "ramming" each other. Now it's quiet, well not quiet, the birds are very loud. Haven't seen an animal for about ten minutes so I'm off to bed. Can't wait for my kids to see it. My girls are big animal lovers which is why we own two bunnies, two hamsters, a dog and fish. They will get a kick out of this. Read more:addiction
Food For Thought Friday Edition #1 1970-01-01 00:59:59 I'm in a dinner menu rut. My kids are very picker eaters and pretty much eat the same five foods. It has become a real challenge to come up with meals that they like. We have our faves but they have gotten a bit boring and redundant. The kids don't mind but it's obvious hubby is ready for a change when he comes home and asks, "chili again?"I have an idea and I hope I'll have some willing participants. I would like to do a recipe exchange on Friday
s. I will post an easy recipe that has approval from at least one of my kids. If you have a recipe to share then post it on your blog and I will link to you. Maybe, if there's enough participants we could have a different theme every week. It would be nice to have recipes that have been tried and deemed worthy of sharing. So often I have tried a recipe because of the pretty picture only to have it not taste as good as the picture.Feel free to share a story or your review of your recipe. Does this interest anyone?I'm going to share two re Read more:Edition
Food For Thought Friday 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Thank you everyone who participated last Friday
. I had hoped to have this up sooner but I still haven't recovered from thinking yesterday was Wednesday. My recipe today is incredibly easy and my kids love it. They even eat the broccoli! Typical for my recipes I don't have measurements.angel hair pasta noodles, cooked (enough to feed your family)1-2 chicken breasts, cut uplarge bag of frozen broccoli with 3 cheese sauceSaute chicken in butter and garlic. Add bag of broccoli and a cup or so of parmesan cheese. Stir until heated. Pour over pasta.Yummy!If you would like to participate in Food For Thought Friday then post your recipe and leave your link so we can find you.
Ramblings about the ROTFL Awards 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Mommy Off The Record and Izzy Mom are hosting the ROFL awards for the month of September. Momish was kind enough to nominate me for this post. Head over and check out the other nominees. Kevin Charnas gives some great suggestions for code words for sex such as coffee for blow job and martini for 69 although there hasn't been any coffee or martini drinking in my house for a long time. Nonetheless code words for sex are needed in my home because my oldest is catching on to what my hubby is talking about when he announces that she needs to go to bed so we can have mommy and daddy time. She responds with a very disgusted "eeeeeewwwwwwww". I'm curious to ask her what she thinks "mommy and daddy time" is but I'm not willing to open up that discussion since it came up a few months ago and she's obviously starting to get a clue. She had asked me what sex is and I very matter-of-factly responded that sex means you are either a boy or girl and that your sex is determined by what genitals you Read more:Awards
Thursday Thirteen Edition #2 1970-01-01 00:59:59 It's Thursday
already?! I haven't really given this much thought so here are the things I found on the floor of my car this morning. I've consolidated the list since this is the The Thursday Thirteen
and not the Thursday Three Hundred.Thirteen Things Found On The Floor Of My CarSeven Happy Meal toysThe Narnia DVD I've been looking for which is now too scratched to play$3.12 which I'll use to buy a Happy MealPetrified fries and two chicken nuggets (I think I'll just heat these up and save the $3.12)Goldfish (the crackers not the fish) some whole, some smashedOne really dirty, smelly sockThousands of crumbs of God knows what smashed in the carpetFive markers without capsThree broken crayonsTarget receipt from January, 2006. (Yes, it's very possible that's how long it's been since I cleaned out my car)Madeline's lost jazz shoe that I've been yelling at her to find because I shouldn't have to spend $54 on another pair because of her carelessness.Twenty-six ponytail holders in v Read more:Edition
October Photo Contest 1970-01-01 00:59:59 It's time for my sis's photo contest. The theme is Halloween and the prize is a pair of infant hand-painted holiday shoes packaged in a decorative pail from Confetti Kidz Boutique plus a $25 gift certificate.Marigrace will have to have these shoes. They are too cute!Don't forget to visit my renter, Amy's Musings. She's got some funny stuff! Read more:October
, Photo
, Contest
Thursday Thirteen Edition #1 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Thought I would give the ThursdayThirteen
a whirl.And to hot man that caught me staring at the stoplight: I'm totally embarrassed so I hope it made your day.Thirteen Interesting Searches That Picked Me Up 1.can someone tell me webkinz secret code Sorry my darling but one code per person. Save up your money and buy your own or get your parents to buy one unless they are smarter than me and know what a nightmare webkinz can be.2.is there a webkinz fishNope. Only the kind to feed your webkinz kitty. It would not be possible to visit other webkinz since fish can't breathe out of water and according to my oldest, webkinz can die. See #1.3.c-section vs. vaginalDon't sweat it girl. No matter how your baby comes out I guarantee it will be one of the best days of your life. I can't guarantee that your baby won't feel inferior because of how she was born when she's older.4.mom's need sleep husbands don'tYou got that right. I just wish I could convince my hubby.5.mom's behaving sexyI do Read more:Edition
Back On The Wagon 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Seriously, I'm back on the diet. We ate at the Elephant Bar on Saturday and the diet went downhill from there. I gained back one of the two pounds I lost last week. Although I liked some of the Nutrisystem foods I can see me putting the weight back on once I stop the diet. My problem is that I eat too much of the wrong things. I started Seattle Sutton last night and it will be a much better diet for me. The food is fresh, healthy, and everything I need is packaged for me including the fruits and vegetables. I'm supposed to supplement with two glasses of milk a day but I'm not a milk drinker so I'll eat yogurt or cottage cheese instead. I had Orange Roughy with cooked carrots last night and it was good. This morning I had french toast sticks, veggie sausage patty, and baked apples. Now that's my kind of breakfast! My only complaint so far is that the heating directions on the package are too vague: Preparation Instructions: Slice lid and peel back. Warm meal by placing in microwave Read more:Wagon
I'm busy 1970-01-01 00:59:59 My posts may be lacking this week. I'm working on a slideshow for a contest. The theme is Halloween and I'm gathering photos of scary things or places. If you have any that you think fit my theme would you send them to me? No copyrighted photos please.
I'm busy with a crime scene 1970-01-01 00:59:59 The other day I was telling my aunt about a funny post that Christina from Mommy Off The Record wrote for The Imperfect Parent about telling telemarketers you can't talk because you're busy breastfeeding. My aunt had me cracking up because she was telling me how she tells telemarketers that she is investigating a crimescene
and asks the telemarketers questions as if they are involved. I was quite impressed with this tactic and laughed my ass off when I received the following audio file from my friend Natasha. I can't wait for my aunt to hear it. The funniest thing is that the telemarketer in the audio stayed on the line where my aunt got a hang up after the first couple questions. Who knows it may be a setup but nonetheless very funny. Read more:crime scene
Need to vent 1970-01-01 00:59:59 I'm feeling quite irritated with my hubby today and need to vent. My hubby tends to be a bit passive-aggressive and does not realize how his body language comes across at times. Twice this weekend he's ticked me off because of something he said or implied with his body language. The first time was last night while at our kid's school Trunk or Treat party. I ran into my salsa/striptease fitness instructor at the party. I had no idea her son attended our school prior to last night. I introduced her to my hubby as my striptease instructor. Over the next 20 minutes my hubby said three times, "I can't believe you introduced her as your striptease instructor" with a half-hearted laugh. By the third time I asked him why he keeps saying it. Is he embarrassed? It's not like I introduced her as the women I had my first lesbian experience with. His reply was that he thought it was kind of funny. Obviously my hubby doesn't mind me taking the class as long as I don't tell anyone. What is he
Nine Weird Things About Me 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Blog That Mommy has an interesting meme posted and I tagged myself since I'm at a loss for words today. It wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I guess I'm just too close to perfection. Oh, just kidding!I have to have lipstick on all the time. It's the one make-up item I will not leave the house without. I wear a moisturizing lip gloss to bed. I can't stand how it feels to not have lipstick on.My ankles and feet sometimes make a popping noise when I walk. My hubby's do too so our kids are doomed.I'm a picker. I love to pick pimples, cradle cap, and swab ear wax. I'm always picking my kids. The only thing I won't pick is a scab.I have food issues. I don't like my food mixed together or touching each other. I won't eat anything that has been touched by a mushroom or even if I think it may have touched a mushroom. I don't like peas either and my Seattle Sutton lunch yesterday had peas in the pasta salad. I ate around the peas but gagged through the first few bites. It's a Read more:Weird
This is interesting 1970-01-01 00:59:59 READ BEFORE CLICKING ON THE LINK: There are two identical pictures that will appear on the screen. Almost 8000 people were tested to see if they could find the 3 differences and only 19 got it. See how observant you are and if you find all 3 differences, you are one of the most elite people in the world! Read more:interesting
Thursday Thirteen Edition #3 1970-01-01 00:59:59 My Top Thirteen
Costume PicksGo-Go DancerI love the hair and clothes styles of the sixtiesMarilyn MonroeSuch a classic costumePink Marilyn MonroeI would be all over this costume if I was skinnyMother NatureNo reason, I just like itSexy Sam I like this one because it wouldgive me an excuse to wear these:Pregnant nun with hubby as a priest with a hard-onI wanted to wear this last year since I was really pregnant but we didn't get invited to any grown-up parties. I didn't think our kid's catholic school would find it funny at the annual Trunk or Treat party.PirateI love the jacket!Wet T-shirt contest winnerThis is the closest I'll ever get to winning one of theseBat GirlThere's something so sinister about this costume. Love the doll!Royal VampiressThis costume reminds me of the party scene in Eyes Wide ShutNut and Bolt CostumeI wouldn't actually wear this one. It's just too funny to not postCat WomanI could kick some ass in this oneMedusaThe only downfall to this costume is it won Read more:Edition
, Thursday
I don't breed them well 1970-01-01 00:59:59 I often wonder if other mom's have neurotic strung out kids like mine. My sis's little boy can be a little weird with his asking her to smell his feet all the time but she doesn't count because it's in our gene pool. Don't get me wrong, I think my kids are darling but they have a lot of weird quirks. I probably should be saving for their therapy rather than college and weddings.My Little Bits seemed normal until she started crawling. She's doing the Ape Crawl like Madeline did which worries me that she will also have auditory processing issues like Madeline. There's a theory that there is a correlation between crawling and reading. Supposedly babies that do not crawl on all fours do not read well. Madeline reads fine but has trouble with spelling so not sure if the theory applies to us or not. Nonetheless something else for me to worry about. Marigrace also doesn't have any teeth yet and she's ten and a half months old. I'm worried she may not have any teeth at all. Do they m
Food For Thought Friday Edition #3 1970-01-01 00:59:59 Why is it when you lose weight you lose it from the top to the bottom? I've lost six pounds so far on my diet and the majority of that weight was in my boobs. They have just about left the premises. I'm still nursing so when I wean they will be nonexistent. Not pretty; little boobies and big hips. Don't even get me started on my pooch. Thank God there is plastic surgery to make my shallow and vain self feel better but this isn't the point of this post. The point is to give you the recipe for the yummy dip that contributed to my weight gain. When I was pregnant I would make this dip and eat it for lunch. The sodium would blow me up like a balloon but it was worth it. I chose this recipe because it's an easy dip to make that you can bring to all the upcoming holiday events. People will rave about it. Olive Dip8oz. cream cheese, softened1/2 cup Hellman's mayo (tastes best with this brand)2 tbs milk1/2 cup chopped pecans1 cup sliced green olivesWheatables (the ones in t Read more:Edition
, Friday
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