Owner: tamiki.com - Witty Ramblings Of A Lower Class Immigrant URL:http://www.tamiki.com Join Date: Fri, 23 Mar 2007 08:17:44 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: Tamiki.com is an original humor site with witty, clever, and hilarious writing. Many posts are inspired by or revolve around serious social, political or economic issues.They are all funny...sometimes. Written by a 22 year old math student. Site statistics:Click here
Thank you all 1969-12-31 11:00:00 The tamiki.com experiment has ended in success. I still plan on writing regularly, but not everyday. Thank
you for reading, commenting and supporting me. This post will stay at the top, so just scroll down in the future. Now get off your chair and go outside.
tamiki
06/06/07
Just pull the trigger already, and deliver us from your corny jokes 2007-06-09 20:57:23 I’m a failure at everything. I can’t keep a job. I can’t get a girlfriend. And I can’t stop my toe nail clippings from flying into my face.
One night, I was so depressed about my current state of affairs I decided to get drunk. I wanted to be an alcoholic, but it was a Sunday… and the liquor store was closed.
Sinking deeper into depression, I decided to slit my writs. Tragically, the ambulance driver was sober, and got here to save my life in time…
I’m a failure at everything.
Read more:trigger
take heed - corny stuff ahead… 2007-06-09 19:34:35 Put all your eggs in the right basket(s), and you’ll have to hear any basket cliches anymore.
If you put that in your bong, and smoke it, you won’t care that you put all your eggs in one basket.
If you always put your best foot forward, the right basket is investing in a cane.
If you always put your best foot forward, you might as well break a leg.
Don’t put your money where the drought is…
Put up your dukes… only if you want a wedgie.
The game of the name is that I only like the naked truth when it’s a hippie who named her daughter “Truth” (over 18 of course )
I once was at death’s door, and when he answered I asked to borrow some sugar.
If you scratch the surface, you’ll make a molehill out of a mountain.
Make or break - we all know what the manufacturer’s union choose…. that’s business as usual.
Only a teacher can make the grade.
His days are numbered… that’s what he bought the damn calend Read more:stuff
, ahead
Investment guru makes new move - Part 6 2007-06-09 16:15:00 Click here for Part 1. You can do a search for “buffet,” for the other posts, on your left.
Two years ago, billionaire investor Warren Buffet bought a huge stake in the Anheuser Busch beer brewing company. His reasoning was that “there is a high probability that people will be drinking alcohol until the end of humanity.”
Today, in a strikingly similar manner, billionaire investor Warren Buffet has just announced the purchase of the Kim Jong-Il. He stated, “10,000 years from now, New York City’s fruits and vegetable market will still be dominated by Korean green grocers.”
Read more:makes
word up boricua 2007-06-09 15:29:54 tamiki is going to the Puerto Rican day parade tomorrow. All who wish to join him in throwing water on white t-shirt wearing girls are welcome. No lye throwing allowed - it will not get you married to a spicy latina:
Blind to His Faults
She Spurned Him, He Maimed Her, and They Lived Happily Ever After, Sort Of
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/06/05/AR2007060502824.html
Random dating banter 2007-06-08 14:03:41 A girl once told me that she studied marketing.
I said, “Really? I do too, I just did a market research project.”
“Oh yea? On what?” she said thinking (correctly) that I just wanted to get into her pants.
“I found out that Gillette will go out of business if there is a worldwide Islamic Revolution,” while scratching my stubble.
Gets a giggle all the time
Also, once, a girl told me she liked art - painting and drawing.
I said, “Me too.”
“Really?”
“Yup… I draw a mean stick figure…”
This is before I discovered the internet, where everyone draws stick figures. I was 8 at the time, and the girl was 5… just kidding.
Feel free to use these jokes if you are a heterosexual male or a lesbian. If lesbian, you can invite me over rather than crediting me.
Read more:Random
In the beginning… 2007-06-11 08:33:12 A big Jewish baby should not be named David, especially if it’s a girl.
So I shaved my head… I look cool 2007-06-16 15:25:37 The median age in the United states is 36.4 years old.
This means you should buy stock in exotic car companies, because a lot of men are about to have mid-life crises…
Chicken stock… that’s for cooking right? 2007-06-16 15:19:08 I was having a conversation about stocks when someone said, “As baby boomers continue age you should buy companies that make prosthetic hip and knee replacements.”
I replied, “As baby boomers continue to age, I’ll buy funeral home stock.”
Read more:Chicken
, cooking
She looked a little “red” in the face… 2007-06-13 17:27:03 I walked into the Museum of the American Indian (or whatever it is called) today, and asked the cute white girl at the information booth where the craps table was…
Read more:little
Your job is to build our railroads 2007-07-06 06:58:54 Setup: China is challenging India for tech outsourcing, but lags India in college graduates who speak the English language.
Punchline: I guess the British colonization of India was worth something after all.
http://www.forbes.com/business/2007/07/06/india-china-outsourcing-markets-econ-cx_rd_0705markets5.html?partner=rss
Paris Hilton in the Wall Street Journal 2007-07-05 05:00:36
http://blogs.wsj.com/washwire/2007/07/03/more-to-come-on-paris-hilton/
Mary Lu Carnevale reports on reaction to Bush’s clemency for ParisHilton
.
Some conservatives were frustrated with President Bush’s decision to grant “Simple Life” Hilton something less than a full pardon for his felony convictions of perjury and obstruction of justice.
Robert Novak, the columnist who triggered the leak inquiry by reporting that CIA operative Valerie Plame was the wife of Iraq war critic Joseph Wilson, summed it up this way in his column today: the commutation “pleased but did not fully satisfy restive conservatives, while enraging his liberal critics. Hilton himself can breathe a sigh of relief that he does not have to serve prison time, but hardly anybody else is all that happy.”
Indeed, reaction from many conservatives was tepid and terse, seeming to echo Hilton’s lead lawyer Ted Wells who said Hilton and his family “wish to express their gratitude” to Bush but added: “We c Read more:Street
, Journal
, Paris Hilton
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