Owner: how far from the pack have you strayed? URL:http://thingsthatarenotwrong.blogspot.com/ Join Date: Sat, 17 Mar 2007 14:33:03 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: the observations of a somewhat well-educated and curious student of american history who reads and views more media than he really should. all of that, and hopefully he is able to bring the funny every now and then. Site statistics:Click here
mean jean schmidt steps in it. literally. 2007-03-17 16:43:00 we all remember mean jean schmidt, idiot republican congresswoman from ohio? the idiot who so loudly booed on the house floor last year after calling rep. john murtha a coward...all while wearing a horrid flag-styled jumpsuit of some sort. ew. well, she may have gotten part of her comeuppance...friday on Capitol Hill, Rep. Jean Schmidt (R-Ohio) was seen making a spectacle of herself when the unlucky lawmaker slipped and fell in what we’re told was vomit, in a bathroom in Cannon [Office Building]. “She made THE biggest scene in the hallway,” says a staffer who escaped the, um, regurgitation. “It’s literally
all down her back.”oh the joys of karma. Read more:steps
joe biden: articulate and angry 2007-03-17 15:36:00 now, i am not the biggest fan of the biden, but this kind of little yell of a speech is not only spot-on, but oh-so-wonderfully loud and un-senatorial. kudos to sen. biden. i only wise there was much more of this coming from somewhere in the senate other than bernie sanders of teddy kennedy...if only biden was more, um, articulate in his depiction of other candidates (especially those whose names rhyme with Marack Abama), he might actually get some traction in this whole nutty presidential campaign. from countdown with keith: Read more:angry
americans: ignorantly religious 2007-03-15 03:52:00 seeing as how there's all this talk lately about christian morals and the crap about the u.s. being a christian nation (see that pesky constitution if you disagree), i found these recent stats about americans' knowledge, or lack thereof, of christianity and religion to be hilarious. i mean, if americans are so frickin christian and use it to justify everything from morals to foreign policy, you'd expect them to know the basic stuff. maybe they just focus on on hating gays, stopping abortion, preping for the rapture, and asking god to bless the powerpoint. cause jesus was so down with all that stuff, right? the scary thing is, i bet most "christians" think jesus did hate gays....a claim not shown in any of the gospels (and i have read and know all 4, unlike most folks, as is shown below). all this might even just make jesus spin in his grave, according to james cameron, at least.wonkette gives us some great stats on how little americans know of their supposedly beloved religion Read more:religious
up yours, my fellow americans 2007-03-14 18:29:00 hillary tells the national league of cities to fuck off. i know, it seems like an unfortunate event. but in retrospect, at least she was in DC and not boston, where we all would have thought the backdrop was terrorist bomb in the guise of an ad for aqua teen hunger force. Read more:fellow
duncan hunter defends pace 2007-03-14 16:02:00 rep. duncan hunter (R and presidential candidate) tried his best not to sound more bigoted than pace did the other day when he got up and defended pace yesterday:Rep. Duncan Hunter said that homosexual conduct "is not moral conduct" and that the right of Pace to express his views "is what Marines go to war and fight for...to have morals."The presidential aspirant and top House Republican on military matters said that "Marines are allowed to have principals" and that in his view, Pace's views "will receive a resounding 'yes' from Marines defending our rights" to have morals and principles.Hunter referred to the "don't ask, don't tell" policy, passed by Congress after a firestorm of debate in which advocates argued that allowing homosexuals to serve openly would hurt troop morale and recruitment and undermine the cohesion of combat units.FACT: Seventy-three percent of service members in a recent poll said they felt comfortable around gays, lesbians and bisexuals, and 78 percent rep
peter pace: homosexuality is immoral and like adultery...all at the same time 2007-03-13 13:52:00 ya know, mr. pace, i don't think someone who's helping to spearhead an unjustified war should really do around calling what other people do immoral..."I believe homosexual acts between two individuals are immoral and that we should not condone immoral acts," Pace said.I CERTAINLY don't condone your immoral acts of war either, mr. pace, but i'm not stupid enough (or desperate to create a diversion from the war in the media) to liken them to adultery.what an idiot."I do not believe the United States is well served by a policy that says it is okay to be immoral in any way," Pace told the newspaper in a wide-ranging interview. oh, he's such a tool...do i start my list here of immoral american policies that in no way involve who you sleep with? the rest of the article follows:The chairperson of the Joint Chiefs of Staff said he considers homosexuality to be immoral and the military should not condone it by allowing gay personnel to serve openly, the Chicago Tribune reported. Marine Ge
fora bush! 2007-03-11 03:08:00 ...translated from portuguese means "get out, Bush." ok, we understand where you are coming from, but give us a break from him. think of it like babysitting...we have to put up with him most of the time. donde los yikes, i think they really don't like the president...but can i just go one week without more unnecessary nazi comparisons. really, that'd be great. he's really bad, but he's not hitler, ok?
mccain goes to the dark side 2007-03-11 00:34:00 for those who were terribly afraid that the republican-Star Wars analogies were limited to darth, i mean, dick cheney, the LA Times is here to let us know that it's john mccain who's the real darth vader of the republican party. on that note, can i nominate denny hastert as jabba the hut?
don't know, don't think 2007-03-10 21:42:00 steven colbert has a few thoughts on the legislation seeking to end don't ask, don't tell..."That is why I am encouraging the Pentagon to adopt an even stricter policy, 'Don't Know, Don't Think.' Under the new policy, it will be against regulations for a soldier to even know what homosexuality is."see the rest of "the word" segment titled An Army of Mum here. Read more:think
zell miller has all the answers 2007-03-10 01:54:00 zell miller, the former democratic senator from georgia and current foxpert (fox news 'expert'), whom you may remember for coming out agaist kerry in '04, challenging chris matthews to a duel, speaking for the president at the republican national convention, and foaming at the mouth over and over while slamming his own party, has once again come out with quite the interesting statement. no, he's not challenging anyone else to a duel or calling john kerry "more wobbly than any other national figure." instead, he claims to have discovered the reason why social security is in trouble, illegal immigration is up, and why the armed forces are in desperate need of additional members. i'll let zell explain his magical answer in his own words (Miller was speaking at a fund raiser for Save a Life Center of Macon, Georgia, an organization which tries to persuade women not to have abortions):"How could this great land of plenty produce too few people in the last 30 years? Here is the brutal t Read more:answers
gingrich admits affair 2007-03-09 19:26:00 human muppet imitator newt gingrich, yesterday admitted to having an affair while married to second wife (he's on wife #3 now) and while he was speaker of the house. why do i care? well, remember kiddies, this guy was discussing divorce with his first wife while she was recovering from cancer surgery, so he's a real class act. anywho, i really do not care about newt's personal life or who he's sleeping with (the thought makes me cringe), but the hypocrisy of cheating on his wife at the same time that he's leading the charge against clinton for his affair with the lewinsky is simply delicious. moreover, newt made the confession of his infidelity in an interview with dr. james dobson's conservative christian focus on the family."There are times that I have fallen short of my own standards. There's certainly times when I've fallen short of God's standards," gingrich said. why stop with god, newt? you've fallen short of many, many, other standards, too.
thanks for flying Intolerance Airlines 2007-03-09 17:13:00 a follow up to what i heard on npr yesterday...is it really the best foreign policy symbolism to send the vp to "liberated" Afghanistan in a plane named after an arch segregationist? is this what the administration means by exporting american values?at least it's not a commercial airplane. those are segregated enough already with the whole first class/business class/coach thing... Read more:Intolerance
, Airlines
coultergiest goes after doctors 2007-03-09 14:42:00 yep, she's going even more off the never ending deep end that is her craziness...now she's repeated the edwards homophobic slur and gone after doctors who perform legal abortions, saying that these doctors are in need of an operation themselves, what she calls "a procedure with a rifle": (oh, that's hilarious)"Speaking at the recent Reclaiming America for Christ conference, (televangelist D. James Kennedy's annual political rally), Ann Coulter not only repeated her now infamous anti-gay slur to the Christian group, but she declared that she can 'understand' the assassination of doctors who perform legal abortions."...in some other news, some sensible conservatives (yes, they do exist...somewhere) have stared a petition to stop having coultergiest speak at CPAC. but what all of this really means, is that Law and Order can now do at least 2 more coultergiest-themed episodes this year. you know they can't pass up an opportunity to do a show where someone takes coultergiest's advo
an interweb rumor worth attention? 2007-03-09 01:24:00 yeah, there have been tons of rumors over the past few years of the impending resignation of darth, excuse me, dick cheney. usually, someone quasi-sane as myself would disregard these interweb rumors as wishful thinking, be they proffered by dreaming liberals or some disillusioned condi-as-vp nutjobs. but this time, it's neither of these. it's the reserved speculation of the op-ed page of the Washington Post. that makes me pay a tiny, wee bit of attention
:"However beleaguered, Cheney will not resign over the president's refusal to take his advice. The only force that could drive him to that dramatic step would be that unshakable sense of loyalty to Bush, who desperately now needs a vice president in stable physical, emotional and political health. That is the equation you want to be watching." it's also made the far-right bush apologists at Newsmax bring up the old condi switcheroo again. anyway, it's probably near impossible the the vp will step down, but with the president's a
why i give $ to NPR 2007-03-08 17:36:00 so, the npr tells me two things today that are worthy of note1.) Helen Mirren was not wearing underwear at the Oscars...is that what she meant when she said "I give you the queen"?2.) the name of the military aircraft that shuttled VP Cheney around on his tour of asia and the middle east last week was, hand to god, The Spirit of Strom Thurmond. Al Sharpton could not be reached for comment.
conservatives give gay porn star an award 2007-03-08 15:12:00 ok, so y'all may remember hearing about the CPAC conference last weekend where coultergiest made her homophobic slur against john edwards. well, one more interesting little tidbit has arisen from that gathering of *cough* conservatives. it turns out that Matt Sanchez, a 36-year-old Columbia student and Marine Corps reservist, who has been all over fox news in the past cause he claims he was mocked about his military service by folks at Columbia, has also gone by the name "Rod Majors" in such cinematic triumphs as Jawbreaker, Donkey Dick, and Glory Holes Of Fame 3. yep, he's a former gay porn star (and male escort, as it turns out...but no business with the fabulously rev. ted haggard has turned up yet).so why was he at the CPAC conference, you ask? well, aside from his past cozying up to coultergiest, hannity, o'reilly, gingrich, malkin, and other conservatives after he spoke publicly on his experiences at Columbia (bashing one of the evil eight will get you on fox news, no problem)
the glass is 80% guilty 2007-03-07 22:35:00 steven colbert explains why scooter libby was found guilty, why he will eventually get off, and how one can use jethro tull to get out of jury duty...forget the jury, even i'm a bit confused.
Where's your god now? 2007-03-07 21:37:00 if only the governemnt was actually no longer trusting god...via the good folks @ wonketteSpend Only Genuine Godless Coins on Your Satanic Vending Machine FareHey did you know that there are BRAND NEW DOLLAR COINS? With PRESIDENTS on them? Yes?But did you know that they are tools of Satan?An unknown number of new George Washington dollar coins were mistakenly struck without their edge inscriptions, including “In God We Trust,” and are fetching around $50 apiece online.So go pick one up on eBay and pretend you live in America before the red scare. Play quarters while reciting the old socialist version of the pledge of allegiance! And make sure to indoctrinate your neighbors kids!
snow patrol on snl 2007-03-17 20:37:00 happy st. patty's day indeed! the snow patrol are going to be on saturday night live tonight!!! yay!!! ...of course, there is a bit of irony that it's a northern irish band on st. patty's day...but, hey, maybe this will finally get paisley and adams to get their act together and form a frickin' devolved parliament at stormont already. oy. ...sorry bout the tangent there into n. irish politics. it cannot be helped. but anyway...the snow patrol will be on the tv tonight!!!! it's the only reason to watch nbc until studio 60 comes back. happy happy joy joy!
forever stamps? i can't even find the one i bought yesterday 2007-03-20 02:33:00 the u.s. postal service, perhaps in an attempt to defuse the disproportionate hype that always accompanies a stamp rate hike, has come up with an idea to calm some nerves...but not mine:The cost of mailing a letter will go up on May 14, but you'll be able to lock in that price - no matter how rates rise in the future - by buying the new "forever" stamp. The post office governing board agreed Monday to accept the new 41-cent rate for first class mail recommended in February by the independent Postal Regulatory Commission. The board also agreed to the proposal for a "forever stamp," that will always be valid for mailing a letter no matter how much rates increase....expected to be attractive to many people is the forever stamp. The first forever stamps will sell for 41 cents apiece, but they won't have a price printed on them and they will remain valid for sending a letter regardless of any future rate increases.lock in my stamp price? i'm not getting a frickin mortgage! could the
year five begins...more hard work to come... 2007-03-19 17:05:00 year five of the war in iraq has arrived, and only now does condi rice finally dip her toe in the pool of the reality-based community by saying that "the Bush administration likely erred by failing initially to send enough troops to quell the civil strife that followed the overthrow of Saddam Hussein." um, duh?! after telling the ap this, condi also "called for patience" in iraq. you can call all you want for it, you ain't getting it.so condi, i just heard the president give the same speech he's been giving for four years. progress is being made, but it's hard work, there will be good and bad days, september 11, we got rid of a dictator, keeping us safe, 9/11, blah blah blah...i'm so sick of this i could vomit...so happy birthday iraq war; no offense, but i'm hoping you don't make it to your next birthday. and you are not getting a present. not even a card.
here are some ideas, sue grafton 2007-03-19 02:33:00 sue grafton, for anyone who has been able to avoid her, writes best-selling murder mysteries such as a is for alibi, m is for malice, and q is for quarry...so you get the gimmick she's using. i see her books at work all the time; she's on s is for silence now. on a side note, yeah, quarry was a stretch, i agree, but it was q, so she is excused. i bet x will be interesting...maybe someone will be killed by a xylophone. anywho, chris steck has some suggestions for what sue can do after z is for zombies (if only that was really it, i may actually read that one).Possible Titles for Future Sue Grafton Novels After She Runs Out of Letters.BY CHRIS STECK- - - -"/" Is for Slash":" Is for Colon Cancer ... or Is It?"F1" Is for Help"," Is Almost for Coma"#" Is for #27"^" Is for Caret-id Artery"~" Is for Tilde-ath"Ctrl+X" Is for Cut Read more:ideas
more quixotic american wars 2007-03-22 15:25:00 wow...see, i have played versions of this game before; it's good to know other people are spending their free time in likewise pursuits.Some Entirely Realistic Suggestions Following the Failures of the Quixotic "War on Drugs" and "War on Terror."BY JAMES MURRAY AND ANDREW MEEK- - - -The War on DrunksThe War on Unpaired SocksThe War on Late DVD Rental FeesThe War on Teaspoons Left in the SinkThe War on Declaring Wars on Stateless Individuals and Ideologies Whose Very Nature Precludes There Ever Being an End to Said ConflictsThe War on France
rove and subpoena...go together like peanut butter and fluff 2007-03-22 04:59:00 it has finally happened, turd blossom himself is set to be forced to testify, in public, under oath, before congress on his role in the firings of gonzo's us attorneys. so kudos to congress for, ya know, actually doing something, especailly after the crappy deal that fred fielding (the president's white house counsel) offered them. moreover, you know you're in trouble mr. president when you've called fred fielding in for help. (note: mr. fielding was a deputy white counsel under another president during a scandal. yep, you guessed it, nixon and watergate).not like rove testifying will actually happen, but the idea of rove and miers before a limelight-hogging committee is kinda nice. anywho, the president will surely cite executive privilege (cause they were private conversations) as a way out of this one, and it will all get thrown into the dc circuit court where another recently installed us attorney will have to decide to convene a grand jury on contempt of congress charges f Read more:together
paging chris hansen... 2007-03-21 23:24:00 from countdown's extra-wonderful worst person in the world segment last night:The bronze goes to John Gibson of Fox Noise, complaining that on his network, Neal Gabler had the temerity to criticize the honesty of Fox Noise. He said Gabler should quit, and added "I hate to see a guy prostituting himself."Had the mirrors taken out, Gibby?Our runner-up tonight: German animal rights activist Frank Albrecht. He complained that the Berlin City Zoo chose to hand-feed a polar bear cub, that had been abandoned by its mother. The zoo intervened to save "Knut" -- all 19 pounds of him. Handlers even gave him his own Teddy Bear.Mr. Albrecht says this is a "gross violation of animal protection laws," since Knut will never be able to easily interact with others of his species, so, quoting him, he says "The zoo must kill the bear."Thinking here that maybe it's Mr. Albrecht who can't easily interact with others of his species?But our winner is Mr. Tumble, a BBC kids' show host who greets his young
pluie to be shot from the skies for cash 2007-03-23 20:33:00 ok, not pulie per se, but wolves in general. the ny times reports today, in the wonderfully titled article "alaska to pay pilots in plan to kill wolves:"Alaska will pay pilots licensed to shoot wolves from the air $150 for each wolf they kill under a new plan intended to protect their prey, including moose and caribou, state wildlife officials said yesterday.so i ask myself, what would pluie, the wolf so-famously killed by ranchers on the west wing think? and then i remember the wise words of c.j. cregg: "More people get killed getting change out of vending machines than get killed by a wolf attack. Number of people killed last year retrieving change from a vending machine: four. Number of people killed by a wolf attack: zero."
"all i want are jets with frickin laser beams attached to them!" 2007-03-23 16:50:00 really? we are naming defense projects after 24? what's next? project grissom to improve fingerprinting databases? and is it just me or does this sound like a stupid-ass, won't-work-but-we-will-spend-billion-on-it-like-missile-defense-anyway idea anyway?from usa today:The Homeland Security Department and the military this summer will test whether drones flying 65,000 feet above the nation's busiest airports could be used to protect planes from being shot down by terrorists with shoulder-fired missiles.Dubbed "Project Chloe" after a character on Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff's favorite TV show, 24, the anti-missile strategy is the latest to be explored by government leaders looking to thwart potential missile threats at commercial airports...
boxer's got the hammer now! 2007-03-23 02:45:00 boxer slaps down "global warming is a hoax" sen. james inhofe during al gore's testimony before congress. if only c-span was like this more often...
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