Owner: Laugh IT Out URL:http://www.laughitout.com/ Join Date: Mon, 12 May 2008 12:58:20 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: Laugh IT Out is a blog about jokes, funny pictures, funny stories , funny quotes etc. Come here for daily smile Site statistics:Click here
Remember Things By Association 2008-05-22 12:40:56 An elderly couple had been experiencing declining memories, so they decided to take a power memory class where one is taught to remember things by association.A few days after the class, the old man was outside talking with his neighbor about how much the class helped him."What was the name of the Instructor?" asked the neighbor."Oh, ummmm, let's see," the old man pondered. "You know that flower, Read more:Remember
Rewards In Heaven Are Based On Results 2008-05-22 12:28:40 Two men arrive at the Pearly Gates at about the same time, both wanting to know if they will be admitted to heaven. St. Peter asks the first man his name, where he is from, and what he did in life.The man answers that he is John Smith and that he was a taxi driver in New York City.St. Peter looks through his book, then gives the man a luxurious silken robe and a golden staff, and bids him welcome Read more:Rewards
, Heaven
If You Are Pissed - Never Let Others Know 2008-05-21 13:42:53 A soldier serving overseas far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote to break off their engagement and ask for her photograph back.He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together, and sent them back with a note saying, "I regret that I cannot remember which one you are. Please keep your photo and return th Read more:Pissed
, Others
Its Not Easy Lying To You Wife 2008-05-21 13:32:36 A woman came up behind her husband while he was enjoying his morning coffee and slapped him on the back of the head."I found a piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name 'Marylou' written on it," she said, furious. "You had better have an explanation.""Calm down, honey," the man replied. "Remember last week when I was at the dog track? That was the name of the dog I bet on."'The next morni Read more:Lying
Life's Golden Mantra 2008-05-24 13:15:01 When life is hard andPayday is still so far awayAnd when the salary comes it’s not enoughthere is only one thing to do********
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Military Cost Cutting 2008-05-24 12:43:01 Government have decide cut military expenses from this year. More stress will be on human capabilities than on mechanical strength.This will also create a large number of jobs in military with following profile.**********APPLY NOW - HURRY
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Advise To Give Your Daughter About Man 2008-05-24 11:50:01 1. Don't imagine you can change a man, unless he's in diapers.2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.3. If they put a man on the moon, they should be able to put them all up there.4. Never let your man's mind wander, it's too little to be out alone.5. Go for younger men. You might as well, they never mature anyway.6. Men are all the same, they just have different faces, s Read more:Daughter
How To Handle You Kids - Without Spanking Them 2008-05-24 11:31:02 Most of America ’s populace thinks it is improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control my son when he has one of ‘those moments.’One that I found effective is for me to just take my child for a car ride and talk.Some say it’s the vibration from the car, others say it’s the time away from any distractions such as TV, Video Games, Toys, etc.Either way, my son usually Read more:Handle
, Spanking
Kids Like To Be Up To Date These Days 2008-05-24 02:37:24 Putting time to good use :)
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Be Very Careful What You Say To Your Wife 2008-05-23 14:51:21
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Doctors Are Internet Geeks Too 2008-05-23 14:46:12
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Are You Dominated By Your Wife? 2008-05-23 13:19:59 Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven.God comes and says, "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth and the other line for the men that were dominated by their women. Also, I want all the women to go with St. Peter."With that said and done, the next time God looked, the women are gone and there are two lines. The line of the men that were domi Read more:Dominated
Top 10 Rejection Lines Given by Women 2008-05-23 13:14:53 10. I think of you as a brother... (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance.") 9. There's a slight difference in our ages... (I don't want to do my dad) 8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way... (You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes on.) 7. My life is too complicated right now... (I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all Read more:Lines
, Given
, Women
Warm Welcome 2008-05-23 13:04:04
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How To Handle Telemarketers 2008-05-25 11:40:10 1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.2. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "Why do you want to know?" Alternately, you can tell them, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my car won't start..." When they Read more:Handle
, Telemarketers
Height Of Makeup 2008-05-25 01:57:33 A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.Seeing God she asked ‘Is my time up?’God said, ‘No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live.’Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come i Read more:Height
, Makeup
Be Honest With Your Age 2008-05-26 12:36:19 A lady is having a terrible day at the tables in Vegas. Down to her last $100, being so upset, she cries, "What rotten luck! What in the world should I do now?"A gent next to her, trying to calm her down a bit, calmly suggests, "I don't know... Why don't you play your age?"He walks away. Moments later, he is intrigued to hear a great commotion at the roulette table. Maybe, she won!Rushing back to
A Good Excuse 2008-05-26 12:33:00 A man was driving home late one afternoon above the speed limit. He noticed a police car with its red lights in his rearview mirror. He thought, "I can outrun this guy," so he floored it and the race was on. The cars were racing down the highway at 90 miles an hour. Finally, as his speedometer passed 100, the guy figured, "What the heck," and gave up. He pulled over to the curb. The police officer Read more:Excuse
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