Owner: Yeah...I Said It URL:http://listentoleon.net Join Date: Tue, 15 Aug 2006 16:09:35 -0500 Rating:1 Site Description: Leon is a genius. Leon is a simpleton. Somehow, Leon is both at the same time. Whatever the case, Leon WILL make you laugh. That much is guaranteed. Site statistics:Click here
I'm The Pappy! 2006-12-06 23:18:00 Apparently, last week was a little wilder than even I thought. I woke up this morning, and got a call from Mary Cheney, daughter of Vice President Dick Cheney. Here's how our conversation went:
5:47 AM: *Phone rings*
Me: "Who the f*ck is this? Callin' me at 5:46..."
Mary Cheney: "It's 5:47"
Me: "You know what the f*ck I meant. Who is this?"
Mary Cheney: "It's Mary. Mary Cheney. The Vice
An Eddie Murphy Discussion 2006-12-05 21:31:00 This morning on The Today Show, EddieMurphy
was interviewed about his upcoming role in the film "Dreamgirls," set to open on Christmas Day. Apparently, the role has garnered critical acclaim and is showcasing a versatility never before seen from Murphy. This led me to wonder if Eddie Murphy
is about to once again become the megastar he was in the late '80s and early '90s.
One could argue that he Read more:Discussion
Danny Glover Said It Best In "Lethal Weapon" 2006-12-04 17:14:00 "...I'm getting too old for this sh*t."
That's basically how I felt after my four-day birthday celebration came to a close. Thanks to everyone who helped to make this weekend great. I must now go down my "Thank You/F*ck You" List for the people I ran into from Wednesday night until Saturday night.
Thank you to Tee, Tajh, Marquis and Lamond for looking out for me at The Gardens this weekend. You Read more:Danny
, Glover
, Lethal
, Weapon
"Project Mayhem" Aborted 2006-11-30 23:17:00 Ladies and gentlemen, I regret to inform you that Saturday's plan to show up at a DC area nightclub as deep as possible and take it over has been aborted. The mission, dubbed "ProjectMayhem
" in honor of Fight Club, will not go on as planned due to an unexpected cold that I am suffering from. I refuse to commit to partying when my health status is up in the air. That's all I need is for one of
The Bus Stop Beatdown 2006-11-29 19:19:00 I don't remember if I've told you all the story about when Pay-Pay and the rest of my friends jumped me in 3rd or 4th grade. It's a good one, so you will enjoy it. I thought about it since one of said ass-whippers left his "Play Lotto" trademark on here in the comments section yesterday. @ Jimmy, Hope you can still make it out this Friday. All of the details are already taken care of, bro.
The Read more:Beatdown
Someone's Getting Free Advertising Today 2006-11-28 17:07:00 I'm going to be brief today. This commercial has been out for months, but I still laugh every time I see it.
"WHAT'CHU GONNA DO WHEN I BANG THE BLOCK?! PULL UP ON THAT @SS WITH A BRAND-NEW DROP!! SPEAKERS ON BLA...Hi"
Man, whoever came up with that commercial deserves a promotion. He picked the funniest song for that guy to sing in the bathroom by himself, too. Sheer comedy.
I'll write Read more:Advertising
, Today
the birthday approaches 2006-11-25 18:41:00 let me begin this entry by letting you all know that i'm typing this on a computer where the shift keys do not work. the reason for that is because i am still at my grandma's house in va. the power supply in her computer died in the summertime, and me being the black mcguyver, i told her that i could fix everything. i put int he new power supply, but somewhere along the way, the sound stopped
Inspiration Is Lacking So I Must Start Rambling 2006-12-08 20:53:00 I'm busy tapping my creative resources for ListenToLeon.net right now, so I don't really have much for you all today. I'm going to ramble in type form since I have nothing else to offer of substance at the moment.
Upon finally watching the Victoria's Secret fashion show that I TiVoed the other night, I must first publicly declare my love for Adriana Lima.
I would corrupt those angel wings Read more:Inspiration
, Start
, Rambling
Damned E-Coli 2006-12-12 17:57:00 I walked past a Taco Bell the other day, and it almost made me cry. I miss cheap food from my favorite stereotypical Mexican resturant chain. I could feel the tears welling up in the corners of my eyes as I pondered the thought of ordering something and potentially dealing with a hospital visit for the meanest case of bubble guts known to man.
Why has this e-coli stuff been so rampant and
Strained Middle Eastern Relations 2006-12-14 19:55:00 Before I begin, I must take some time out to with my mother a Happy Birthday. I love you, Mom. Also, Happy Birthday to the anonymous poster who keeps on reminding me that her birthday is the same day as my Mom's. Thanks for reading and showing love in the comments section.
Now, on to the story. I have to make someone else famous today, but this idiot deefinitely has it coming to him. The place: Read more:Eastern
, Relations
Great Place For Christmas Gifts 2006-12-15 18:05:00 Last night, I attended a networking social at Zawadi Gallery on U Street in DC. For years, I have walked past the place, or noticed it from afar since my friend's tattoo shop, Top Notch, is almost directly across the street from it. It took my friend Faraji setting up that event and letting me know that his mother is the owner for me to finally check out the place.
Before I go any further, Read more:Great
, Place
, Christmas
, Gifts
I Have A Few Things to Say 2006-12-19 16:46:00 Please allow me to address a few assorted topics that are on my mind this morning.
To the guy who left that extra long, 5 page comment the other day, I think Colin Powell said it best:
Not that what you wrote bothered me...but it had almost nothing to do with what my original post was. Plus, it was longer than The Lord of The Rings trilogy. Had you been concise or maybe put a link for people
Interactive Milestone 2006-12-20 20:24:00 I am one blog entry away from 400. Being on the verge of such a milestone is a great feeling. I will finally take my place among the great trash talkers of all time. Names like Muhammad Ali. Rudy Ray Moore. George Jefferson. Momma from "Momma's Family."
After tomorrow, my name will be on that list. I have literally used this blog for every good and evil purpose imaginable. I've given some people
Interactive Milestone 2006-12-20 20:24:00 I am one blog entry away from 400. Being on the verge of such a milestone is a great feeling. I will finally take my place among the great trash talkers of all time. Names like Muhammad Ali. Rudy Ray Moore. George Jefferson. Momma from "Momma's Family."
After tomorrow, my name will be on that list. I have literally used this blog for every good and evil purpose imaginable. I've given some people
Dating and Expectations 2006-12-22 16:40:00 Well, here it is...My 400th entry. I listened to everyone's suggestions for topics, and went with the theme of dating and relationships since people requested that the most. I appreciate the feedback I received from everyone who submitted suggestions.
About a month and a half ago, I read a book by a DC area author named Tariq Walton. It made me laugh before I even opened it, because it is titled Read more:Dating
A ListenToLeon Christmas 2006-12-24 20:19:00 *Theme music plays in the background as I walk onstage in a Nat King Cole-style smoking jacket, singing*
"Christmas
-time is heeeeeere,
Lots of fun and cheeeeeeeer,
Cousins drinking beeeeeer,
That sweater looks real queeer,
Late shoppers who fiiiiiight,
Jesus was not whiiiiiiiite,
N*ggas stole my biiiiiiiike,
Come check out my siiiiiite"
Welcome, one and all, to the ListenToLeon Christmas
A James Brown Memory 2006-12-27 19:47:00 As I'm sure you have all heard by now, The Godfather of Soul JamesBrown
passed away a couple of days ago. Originally, I planned on writing a regular tribute to the man and his legacy on the blog, but I decided against it. There are plenty of biographies and obituaries on numerous sites all over the internet. Instead, I chose to go a different route and share a personal story of how James Brown Read more:Memory
Heroes of the Vertically Challenged 2007-01-02 19:11:00 Life can be rough for people under 6 feet tall. Especially for men. The challenges faced can seem insurmountable. Like climbing a mountain...Or in our case, a really, really tall hill. Taller guys autmatically assume they can whup their vertically-challenged bretheren. Women never fantacize about short men...always "tall, dark and handsome" ones. Oh, don't mess around and defy the odds by getting
Ever Been So Tired... 2007-01-04 19:38:00 ...that your eyes hurt from inside? As if your brain grew a pair of baby feet and started kicking you the back of your eyeballs? So tired that rays of sunlight coming in the window feel like little tiny pimp slaps, gradually becoming more and more unbearable until you finally admit to yourself that the sunlight is literally kicking your @ss and making you it's b*tch? So tired that you can't even
Officially An Internet Geek 2007-01-09 22:14:00 Yeah, I said it. I am officially an internet geek. I am an internet geek, because I am actually excited about this Washington Post DC Blog Summit that I am attending after work. I remember when I started this thing, it was out of sheer boredom and the desire to spread the funny stories I tell my friends on a regular basis. Now, I am actually at the point where I'm excited to meet other folks who Read more:Internet
, Geek
Electronics for Crackhead Prices 2007-01-08 15:50:00 As many of you may know, I bought my laptop computer this past summer from a shady, hairy Israeli dude named Namir, who was wearing a mesh shirt like the one these little Asian JaFAKEians have on
As you also may know, I bought the computer for crackhead prices. So for that reason, I really can't do all that much complaining. Items bought at crackhead prices rarely come with warranties or Read more:Crackhead
, Prices
Death By Thai Food 2007-01-10 21:23:00 Last weekend, I ate Thai food for the first time in years. I had been avoiding it because my last Thai food experience was not a good one. Last time, I ate some kind of overpriced chicken meal that left an aftertaste in my mouth reminicsent of Scope mouthwash, Wint-O-Green Lifesavers and Halls throat drops. The combination of strong, sinus-clearing flavors was too much for me to handle at once.
The Best of "Leon LePhonso Ellis" 2007-01-12 22:00:00 The other day, I was looking for writing samples of mine over at The INS website when I discovered something that I should have known from day one. That discovery is that all I had to do to find all of the articles by any writer on there is just click on their name under the story. I was over there searching for story titles and wasting time, when I could have just clicked on the name I wrote Read more:Ellis
Thank You Dr. King 2007-01-15 19:14:00 I am about to go fix my sister's computer, so this entry is going to be brief and to the point. Today, I just wanted to show some love to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Dr. King, thank you for everything you stood for, fought for, and ultimately, died for. Your sacrifices made the world a better place. I don't even think folks understand what black folks had to go through during the civil rights Read more:Thank
The Business Card That Wasn't 2007-01-16 22:33:00 As you all may or may not know, things have been going pretty well for me in 2007. The New Year is off to a great start. Professionally, things are moving in the right direction, and even my writing has become more popular. For instance, I was quoted in the Washington Post "Express" newspaper today for the second time this month. I think that tied how many times they quoted me all of last year Read more:Business
Announcement Time 2007-01-18 16:36:00 Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my great pleasure to announce that my blog empire is expanding. I have embarked on a new journey to conquer uncharted terrain. That terrain: King Magazine.
I have a brand new column on King Magazine's website entitled Fine Sh*terature, where I basically...Talk sh*t. But not just ANY kind of sh*t. Only the highest grade of sh*t-talk known to man shall be posted there. Read more:Announcement
A Can't-Lose Super Bowl 2007-01-22 15:26:00 Before I get to the main focus of today's entry, I need to tell the world that I saw some fool this morning walking around outside with no pants on, wearing a tan winter coat and some Timberland boots. First of all, there is no good reason to be outside with no pants on. Especially in January, and definitely not when there is snow on the ground. I guess the snow is why he chose Timberlands over Read more:Super
"Help me! SOMEBODY HELP ME!" 2007-01-24 16:45:00 Why is this stupid Little Richard commercial for Geico stuck in my head?!
The first time I saw it, I was like "This is the dumbest sh*t ever." Now, 6 months later, I'm actually amused by it.
A part of me want to punch Little Richard in the chest and tell him to do some push ups and be like "Man up, you punk @ss b*tch!" Another part wonders what the world would be like if Little Richard
Another Extremely Swaggerful Day 2007-01-26 15:04:00 I'm feeling good.
No...I'm feeling GRRRRRRREAT!
Since it's another day where my swag is on a level that mere mortals such as yourself cannot begin to comprehend, I'm going to take the day off from blogging and let my ego speak for me once again. It's been awhile since the last time I put the uncut thoughts from my ego in print form. I've been letting conscience and logic act as a filter,
Mr Clean 2007-01-29 15:11:00 To all of you out there in Internetland, answer this question for me: What is Mr. Clean
's ethnicity?
I have wondered about that almost my entire life. That bald-headed, Harry Belafonte-looking fellow on the front of the household products has always had that racially ambiguous look about him. He's light, but darker than the average white man. He could very well be a high-yellow black man. Or
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