Owner: The Flint Skinny URL:http://theflintskinny.blogspot.com/ Join Date: Tue, 06 May 2008 08:17:01 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: A random collection of things new and old that I find humorous or otherwise worthwhile. Site statistics:Click here
OZZIE GUILLEN RANT 2008-05-06 07:43:00 "Right now everyone in Chicago is making lineups -- 'Call up this guy, call up that guy.' ... If we had 50 people allowed on the roster, we could do that. That's what ticks me off about Chicago fans and Chicago media: They forget pretty quickly. A couple of days ago we were the [bleeping] best [stuff] in town. Now we're [bleep]. The Cubs haven't won in [100] years, and they're the [bleeping] best. [Bleep] it, we're good. [Bleep] everybody. We're horse[bleep], and we're going to be horse[bleep] the rest of our lives, no matter how many World Series we win."We are the [bleep] of Chicago. We're the Chicago [bleep]. We have the worst owner [Jerry Reinsdorf]. The guy's got seven [bleeping] rings, and he's the [bleeping] horse[bleep] owner.""How about the Cubs celebrating that Lee Elia bull[ble
I'M IN LOVE WITH A STRIPPER 2008-05-06 06:31:00 That's funny....I drew the exact same picture except it was titled "I want to be like daddy"
MAN GETS BANNED FROM THE KMART AND ITS BLUE LIGHT SPECIALS 2008-05-05 19:17:00 This picture really makes me want to go to Kmart and screw around. I must say this guy had some very creative ways of entertaining himself while his wife shops. The condoms in random carts is a great plan because it can cause some drama up at the checkout counter, and I am pretty sure I had hid in clothing racks and yelled pick me before. Whomever this woman is, she is lucky to have such an imaginative husband.Be sure to click on the picture so you can see it large enough to actually read...idiot.
WILL FERRELL GIVES CHRISTOPHER WALKEN SOME MORE COWBELL 2008-05-05 18:17:00 This is the video that started it all. I don't know what this "all" that I speak of is, but it seemed like an appropriate description. If you haven't seen it, you much have been spending quite a bit of time down in Fraggle Rock, because it's everywhere.
SHARK SURFIN' U.S.A. 2008-05-05 13:16:00 While I am still willing to believe in Santa Clause, I cannot bring myself to believe that this video is real. That does not however mean that I don't think it's awesome. I would like to meet the first person to actually do this because that person will immediately be my hero. If any of you do it...I expect credit for introducing the idea to you...then you can become my hero.
BEST OF: FACEBOOK STATUS MESSAGES 2008-05-05 13:04:00 Andy Schwartz is currently taking AWESOME lessons...Anthony Ragnone II "You can't rattle us. We ain't no punks."--Rasheed Wallace.Brian Dress says visit ... You will not be disappointed.Bryn Haffey doesn't understand what the mexicans have against emo - she loves the promise ring.Michele Chirco is trying to dance like the ipod commercials but his headphones keep coming out of his ears. How do they do it?
MY NEXT VACATION 2008-05-04 22:32:00 You can always count on Canada to tell it like it is. They know what they have to offer and they are damn proud of it. Needless to say, this is the new home of The Skinny.I'm just kidding kids, rape is no laughing matter...unless you're raping a clown.
IN THE TIME OF CHIMPANZEES I WAS A MONKEY 2008-05-04 22:13:00 I couldn't even come up with a reason why this might exist other than to entertain me. Who comes up with the idea to race against a chimp on an obstacle course? In any case, it's awesome. It makes it all the better that they make it seem like it is some sort of legitimate competition. If only this chimp was also trained in karate and drop kicked the guy after he lost.
WATCH ME CRANK THAT HONOR ROLL 2008-05-04 22:01:00 Apparently the cool kids don't just want to be rappers these days, they also see the benefit of simple math. So much so that they decided to combine the two of them...and make a CD. You are going to need sounds for this, but it's well worth it listening to even if only to brush up on your multiplication tables.
CHICAGO CUBS ARE PISSED 2008-05-02 11:22:00 In an interviewwith ESPN's Gary Miller, Chicago Cubs outfielder Moises Alou revealed that during baseball season he urinates on his hands to toughen them up. Alou, one of the few major leaguers who doesn't wear gloves while batting, is backed up by Yankees catcher Jorge Posada, who says, "You don't want to shake my hand during spring training." Even Cubs hurler Kerry Wood mentioned on a local radio show that he's tried the technique to remedy blisters on his pitching hand.Here is the article about piss hands if you care to read about its controversial effectiveness.
HIGHTOWER PULLS A TOM CRUISE 2008-05-02 09:15:00 Hightower may not be a movie star, yet, but even Oprah loves him. In honor of Tom Cruise finally returning to the show, Hightower, the guest immediately preceding Tom, did his best re-enactment of Cruise's on-air meltdown. Instead of declaring his love for Katie Holmes, he professed an unhealthy obsession with NCAA mens hoops...specifically when he gets to call a foul. He was quoted as saying, "I know there are people who think it's all about the game and the student athlete, but I know people really tune in to see me work."
CARNIVAL BABY TOSS 2008-05-02 08:39:00 Until now, I thought Benny Lava was the funniest video to come out of India. Now it has some serious competition. While Benny has some sweet lyrics and dance moves, these babies can fly. I am not sure why this tradition would have started way back in the day, but it seems like a pretty bad idea. I think it probably began as the earliest know form of abortion, but when the baby bounced...it was taken as a sign from the gods that tossing babies is a good thing.If you forgot how great Benny Lava is...watch it again.-lava.html
IT'S OFFICIAL, THE SKINNY RULES 2008-05-02 08:18:00 The Skinny has reached it's first milestone....500 unique visitors. While you may have thought you were one of the only people that actually wasted time here, it turns out Michael Jackson was right, you are not alone. A lot of other people are wasting their days away seeking entertainment as well. Hitting 500 mark moves The Skinny into the realm of great sites like...well i can't think of any as cool as TFS, but I am sure there are some out there. Now you don't have to feel like the retarded little ginger step-brother when you think about sending in a video or something to be posted. Go ahead and send that picture of Bush side-by-side with a monkey....it just may get posted.If you have friends in any of the backward states that aren't yet represented on the map....send them the link s
LINDSAY LOHAN JOINS A LONG LIST OF ANGRY LESBIANS 2008-05-02 07:27:00 Lindsay Lohan reportedly verbally abused Ashley Olsen after she spoke to her close friend Samantha Ronson.The 'Mean Girls' actress - who is rumored to be drinking again following her stint in rehab last year - was said to be furious when the former 'Full House' star chatted to DJ Samantha at New York nightspot Beatrice Inn on Friday (18.04.08).A source told the New York Post newspaper: "Samantha was getting a lot of attention which Lindsay didn't like. Ashley Olsen said hello to Samantha at the Beatrice, and Lindsay screamed at her, 'Get your 15-year-old 'Full House' ass away from my girlfriend.' "The following night, Lindsay had a blazing row with Sam - whose brother is producer Mark Ronson - because they weren't spending enough time together.An onlooker at New York's Hawaiian Tropic Zone
I BELIEVE THE CHILDREN ARE OUR FUTURE 2008-05-01 20:02:00 So much of this video his hysterical. First, a seven year old stole a car. That alone makes it skinny worthy. Next, he did it initially because he was mad at his mom, and later admits that "it's fun to do bad things," and "I wanted to do hoodrat things with my friends." He seems pretty proud that his friends smokes cigarettes too. Last, his idea of punishment is spectacular...maybe shouldn't be allowed to play video games for a whole weekend.
THE NEW SCHOOL HUSTLER...GO BIG OR GO HOME 2008-05-01 13:16:00 Man accused of trying to cash check for $360,000,000,000 07:59 PM CDT on Wednesday, April 30, 2008 From Staff Reports A man has been accused of attempting to pass a $360 billion check, which he claims was given to him by his girlfriend’s mother to start a record business, Fort Worth police said. Charles Ray Fuller, 21, of Crowley, was arrested on April 22 on an accusation of forgery, police said. Police responded to a report of a man attempting to pass the check about 4 p.m. that day at the Chase bank in the 8600 block of South Hulen Street, Fort Worth police Lt. Paul Henderson said. The personal check was not made out to Mr. Fuller and when the bank contacted the check owner, the woman said she did not write a c
KILL ME NOW 2008-05-01 07:12:00 Who wants to live in a world that frowns upon tit touching? I don't. Personally, I am all for it, and I have a funny feeling most of The Skinny's readers are as well. That goes for the men and the women, especially the women. I don't know who would make a sign like this or why, but I do know that they must be a communist. If you weren't around in the early weeks of TFS, go back and check the chart from March 27th (it's from Emily, so you can just click the link to anything labeled by her on the right). Originally it had been reported that communism was no long a threat, but I think it is apparent that it's making a come back with garbage like this.
DOUBLE FEATURE - IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN 2008-04-30 20:30:00 Because it's just too good, today is a very special New Wave Wednesday double feature. It's like going to the drive in and staying for both movies, even though the second one sucks, just so that you can get it on some more in the back of the Tahoe. You know you've been there...and it was probably one of your early experiences with the objects of this video. Feel free to leave comments with any additional names you are particularly fond of.
WE THE PEOPLE, FIND THE DEFENDANT... 2008-04-30 19:21:00 I'll be honest, I find British comedy to be incredibly funny. Some people hate it, but I love it. This happens to be one of the few actors I have actually seen in several things and apparently he is now doing some sort of show that makes its way onto youtube. And for the record, I vote not guilty...and you should too.
PISTONS MAY BE UNDERDOGS, BUT WALLACE IS THE FAVORITE 2008-04-30 15:40:00 BetUS.com has posted odds on the next NBA player to admit using marijuana.Dallas Mavericks' star Josh Howard turned heads on Friday when he admitted on the Michael Irvin Radio show that he smokes marijuana regularly in the off-season. Equally as shocking was his willingness to implicate the entire league with regard to marijuana use.Oddsmakers at BetUS.com posted the following odds on the recent Josh Howard drama:Odds on the next NBA player to admit to smoking up: Rasheed Wallace: 2/1 Allen Iverson: 4/1Josh Childress: 4/1 Carmello Anthony: 10/1 LeBron James: 40/1 Shaquille Oneal: 100/1 Dirk Nowitzki: 250/1 For more, visit
PIMP DOWN! 2008-04-30 09:22:00 Who says it's always the women on their backs for the pimp? This poor guy was just trying to defend his employee by confronting a gentleman who had disrespected her. Rumor has it the man told her a 'yo momma' joke while unaware that her mom was dead. In the immortal words of Big Daddy Kane "pimpin' ain't easy"
NEW WAVE WEDNESDAY VOL. 9 2008-05-07 08:50:00 It seems appropriate to have the first video ever shown on MTV be a part of New Wave Wednesday.
HUMP DAY SPAM VOL. 9 2008-05-07 07:30:00 Instill fear in your lady tonight, with VPXL inspired cock's might.There seem to be a lot of these about fear and whatnot...and ladies want to chime in on if they want to fear the penis?Overdue Notice - Two unrelated women in neighboring township allergic to stings in the same rare way?OOk, so the majority of this was actually in the email, but it was too confusing to pass up. Especially because it is somehow for a Viagra and Cialis combo packShock her with your new wangAgain with the whole shock and awe ad campaignsThe best way to strip a womanNow this...I may have to do some research on. Stay tuned for the exclusive step-by-step instructionsBe a god of her intimate dreamsDone. I like to think there are a lot of ladies out they dreaming of making sweet sweet love to The Skinny.
UTAH LIQUOR LAWS CHANGE...MORMONS STILL A PROBLEM 2008-05-07 07:07:00 Utah recently upgraded it's alcohol laws. In a big move for the tourism industry, bars are now allowed to serve 1.5 ounces of liquor in a cocktail. While alcoholics, like The Skinny, rejoice at this news, some bars and clubs are not as happy. We have all been to a place where the drinks don't taste that strong, and there is certainly no law preventing it. Utah bars have had the perfect excuse for mixing a crappy drink...now they are just going to look like the cheapskates they are.Long live the tall glass of vodka.
SAN DIEGO STATE THETA CHI TEXTS ABOUT SELLING COCAINE...GETS ARRESTED(OBVIOUSLY) 2008-05-06 21:40:00 Here are the highlights of this brilliant move...the whole article is pretty ridiculous if you want to read it.WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Authorities have arrested nearly 100 people and seized guns and drugs in a sting operation at San Diego State University in California, the Drug Enforcement Administration said Tuesday. The news release alleges a member of the Theta Chi fraternity sent a mass text message to his "faithful customers" saying he and some others temporarily would be unable to complete orders for drug sales due to a trip to Las Vegas, Nevada. The text message went on to discuss a "sale" on cocaine and gave details on reduced prices, the news release said.One student allegedly dealing cocaine was a month short of obtaining a master's degree in Homeland Security and worked with campus
WEATHER FORECASTING IS REALLY HARD WORK 2008-05-06 21:27:00 And as you can see here in Ohio, it's storming incredibly hard. Hopefully people have erected there storm shelters before this hot swell came...if not they are pretty big boners. Read more:REALLY
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