Owner: The Film Fiend URL:http://www.thefilmfiend.com Join Date: Mon, 21 Apr 2008 18:02:04 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: Cinematic scribblings to stimulate your pineal gland. In other words, movie news and reviews with a bad attitude. Site statistics:Click here
REVIEW: Surf Nazis Must Die 2008-04-20 10:42:00 Don't get salt water on my Swastika, bro.
Peter George's insanely tasteless 1987 oddity Surf Nazis
Must Die was an integral part of my DIY B-movie education. During the days of USA's extremely influential late night program Up All Night, a show which savagely warped and molded your favorite self-proclaimed film nerd, this strange little tale of one mother's quest to obliterate the neo-Nazi turds
REVIEW: The Cottage 2008-04-19 14:44:00 Never judge a book by its heaving cleavage.
If the French are the undisputed masters of the modern-day slasher, then Britain is the epicenter of the blood-soaked horror/comedy revolution. Writer/director Paul Andrew Williams has scored some serious cinematic points with his witty crime flick The Cottage, a film which takes the From Dusk Till Dawn approach to genre filmmaking. The first half of
NEWS: For The Love Of The LAMB 2008-04-18 20:13:00 I'm feeling very flocculent.
Getting your tiny voice heard within this insanely convoluted universe known as the Blogosphere isn't exactly an easy mission to accomplish. It's true! Everybody and their puke-purple grandmother is blogging these days, clogging the virtual airwaves with their ugly opinions, their hair-brained conspiracy theories, and their tasty chicken recipes. In fact, the number
REVIEW: Welcome To The Jungle 2008-04-18 09:08:00 Irritating twenty-somethings taste like Spam.
Almost every review I've read regarding Jonathan "I ruined The Punisher" Hensleigh's dodgy 2007 horror flick Welcome
to the Jungle
has described this boring tale of annoying characters and their ill-fated journey into cannibal country as a rancid combination of The Blair Witch Project and Cannibal Holocaust. Unfortunately, this generic assessment
SNACK BREAK: Super Fuzz 2008-04-18 00:24:00 Release Date: October 1981
Director: Sergio Corbucci
Tagline: The law and disorder comedy.
Trailer: Click Here Read more:Super
REVIEW: Inside 2008-04-15 10:16:00 I've heard adoption is much easier.
Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury's atmospheric 2007 shocker Inside (aka À l'intérieur) is the latest example of France's penchant for totally sadistic gore and unflinching, uncompromising terror. It's an audacious effort, for sure, eliciting more than a dozen shock-filled moments that will leave you either slack-jawed and bug-eyed or grasping desperately
REVIEW: Cruel World 2008-04-14 08:33:00 He's still working, but not Furlong.
Three questons: First, who in their right mind thought that another horror film based around a faux reality show was an idea worth pursuing? Second, who in their right mind thought that the finished product was worth distributing? Finally, why do people continue to cast Edward Furlong in their wonky cinematic endeavors? These questions await anyone brave Read more:World
REVIEW: Poultrygeist 2008-04-13 13:21:00 This space intentionally left blank.
Try as I might, yours truly has yet to discover the specific word combination that would adequately describe cult cinema legend Lloyd Kaufman's outrageous 2007 horror comedy Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead to anyone who hasn't seen this elaborately offensive farce for themselves. Using Tobe Spielberg's PG-rated classic Poltergeist as a launchpad for
REVIEW: Omega Cop 2008-04-11 22:24:00 Surf rock lives!
Though you won't find his name listed anywhere within the annals of cinematic history, martial arts wizard and part-time B-movie icon Ron Marchini is, in my humble opinion, the quintessential action hero for our disastrous day and age. How so, you ask? The answer, my dear friends, lies deep inside Paul Kyriazi's zany 1990 post-apocalyptic wake-up call Omega
Cop, a film which
REVIEW: In The Name Of The King 2008-04-11 10:19:00 Give me the chicken.
Since I'm of the highly unpopular opinion that much maligned German director Uwe Boll receives an unwarranted amount of negative attention from Internet hacks not unlike myself, this assessment of the despised filmmaker's 2007 effort In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale shall remain 100% free of verbal abuse on a personal level. That said, this insanely daffy Lord
SNACK BREAK: Blazing Stewardesses 2008-04-10 14:28:00 Release Date: June 1975
Director: Al Adamson
Tagline: Eat Your Heart Out Mel Brooks!
Trailer: Click Here Read more:Blazing
REVIEW: Bulletproof 2008-04-10 00:34:00 James Caan will hold you to your word.
Roughly 40 minutes into Ernest R. Dickerson's silly 1996 action flick Bulletproof
, yours truly came to the startling realization that this moderately entertaining Adam Sandler/Damon Wayans vehicle is, in fact, a cleverly disguised slice of softcore gay pornography. The hard evidence: Whilst attempting to escape from the honeymoon suite of a bizarre
REVIEW: Gunmen 2008-04-07 14:54:00 Do the Ed Lover Dance.
After weathering the contagious cinematic disease known amongst hardcore film fanatics as Highlander 3: The Sorcerer (aka Highlander: The Final Dimension), it's anyone's guess why I decided to investigate the dodgy 1994 Christopher Lambert/Mario Van Peebles action extravaganza Gunmen on this exceptionally sunny Spring afternoon. Am I a glutton for punishment, you ask, a
REVIEW: Frontier(s) 2008-04-07 01:27:00 Nazis keep it in the family.
Innovation is hard work, especially when you're toiling endlessly within the horror genre. Xavier Gens -- who wasted my precious time earlier this year with his limp 2007 action groaner Hitman -- certainly won't win any points for originality with his grotesque 2007 splatter drama Frontier
(s), mind you, but I'll definitely give him a handful of pretty gold stars for
REVIEW: Karate Warriors 2008-04-04 15:14:00 Little Japanese boys need to be slapped.
There's a certain amount of raw, free range guilt that accompanies those who view any Sonny Chiba movie produced during the 70's. Graphic violence, pointless nudity, misogyny in all its splendor -- the animated martial arts master's movies are destined to offend anyone with sensibilities as delicate as a wide-eyed virgin's outlook on the American way of Read more:Karate
, Warriors
SNACK BREAK: Good Guys Wear Black 2008-04-03 14:59:00 Release Date: June 1978
Director: Ted Post
Tagline: The C.I.A. can't afford John T. Booker... alive.
Trailer: Click Here Read more:Black
NEWS: The Return Of Henenlotter 2008-04-01 13:04:00 It's about damn time.
Has it really been sixteen long years since cult director Frank Henenlotter dropped the last installment of his insanely twisted Basket Case series on the unsuspecting public at-large? Has it really? It would seem so, dear readers. For several years I've wondered if the man would ever return to the medium, especially after that Sick in the Head project seemed to wither, Read more:Return
REVIEW: Brazilian Brawl 2008-03-31 09:49:00 Pygmy Goat Xing.
Since I'm not the type of suicidal numb skull who enjoys pissing off a family of extremely buff, impossibly intimidating Brazilian
brothers skilled in Jiu-Jitsu, I'm going to try to keep my analysis of Leo Fong's unintentionally hilarious 2003 martial arts epic Brazilian Brawl
as bright and shiny as humanly possible. However, since there are very few words in the English
REVIEW: Day Of The Dead 2008-03-30 01:42:00 How to fudge a remake.
Let's get one thing perfectly straight, shall we? Steve Miner's wonky 2008 genre effort Day of the Dead is by no means a remake of George Romero's highly misunderstood masterpiece. With the exception of an unfortunate character named Bud, Millennium Films' opportunistic direct-to-video zombie flick has absolutely nothing in common with its 1985 counterpart, a fact which
REVIEW: Sukiyaki Western Django 2008-03-28 23:49:00 Miike shoots from the hip.
It's no deep, dark secret that I'll blindly watch anything with maverick Japanese director Takashi Miike's name plastered somewhere upon the packaging. I truly wish I were kidding. So is it really so surprising that I absolutely adore the man's latest action-packed epic Sukiyaki Western
Django, a film that I believe to be among the man's absolute best? Not quite.
REVIEW: Shatter 2008-03-18 00:13:00 British kung fu silliness.
On paper, the idea of combining the spectacular abilities of Hammer Films and Shaw Brothers must have seemed like super swell idea. A twisty British spy flick working side by side with the elaborate kung fu madness of a Hong Kong action picture, in theory, is like pure, uncut cinematic cocaine, the type of stuff that can instantly collapse your nostrils and flash fry
REVIEW: Mother Of Tears 2008-04-22 10:09:00 Dario thinks you're stupid.
When you stop to consider every single ill-conceived element of legendary director Dario Argento's savagely awful 2007 outing Mother of Tears
: The Third Mother -- also known as the final installment of his cherished supernatural trilogy -- it's extremely hard to ascertain which aspect of the film is the absolute worst. Perhaps it's the screenplay by Crocodile scribes
REVIEW: The Screaming Tiger 2008-04-21 20:42:00 Wake me when the screaming starts.
Misleading titles to common household action movies often depress me. Of course, I didn't expect Lung Chien's clunky 1973 Jimmy Wang Yu vehicle Screaming Tiger (Screaming Ninja, King of Boxers, et. al.) to contain an actual living, breathing shrieking Panthera tigris, but one or the other would have sufficed. What we're left to contend with is your standard
REVIEW: Killer Pad 2008-04-24 10:28:00 Respect the hot sauce.
For the past two hours, I've attempted to formulate an opening statement that adequately expresses how deeply embarrassed I am for enjoying Nightmare on Elm Street star Robert Englund's surprisingly entertaining and often hilarious satanic party flick Killer
Pad, but this sort of high grade, fancy-lad literature is simply beyond my grasp. As a general rule, I try to avoid
NEWS: I Can Has A Horror Con 2008-04-24 09:25:00 The Scare Fest creeps out Lexington.
For years I've whined and cried and pounded my pasty little fists in utter frustration over the fact that my hometown of Lexington, Kentucky -- Lex Vegas if you're nasty -- has never hosted a horror convention that was worth anything whatsoever. Come September 2008, however, yours truly will have reason to rejoice. The Scare Fest, one of the largest horror
REVIEW: The Devil's Rejects 2008-04-25 17:04:00 Buying ice cream has never been more obnoxious.
Simply put, Rob Zombie is the Kevin Smith of horror. Much like his self-indulgent counterpart, the House of a 1000 Corpses director has a terrible penchant for unlikeable characters, pop-culture laden dialogue, and a nasty habit of casting his wife in roles that probably should have gone to someone else. Zombie's gruesome 2005 epic The Devil
's
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