Owner: Snarky Momma URL:http://www.snarkymomma.com Join Date: Sun, 25 Feb 2007 14:45:42 -0600 Rating:0 Site Description: Snarky Momma is a blog written by and for the mom who doesn't have it all together. Our hair isn't combed, our pajamas don't match, and our babies are usually dirty. The Snarky Momma doesn't feel guilty that her baby has been wearing the same onesie for t Site statistics:Click here
Hungry Man 2007-03-19 23:17:00 {summary}Rosco is officially four months old today, but I’ve been experimenting with solids with him for at least a few weeks. I was following the guidelines that say that babies who have doubled their birth weights and are getting at least a forty of milk or formula each day are ready to practice with solids. That’s all it is, anyway, practice. Babies don’t really nutritionally need solids until they’re at least six months old (that’s when the iron in breast milk starts becoming insufficient according to our trusty baby doc - fortified rice cereal helps to make up the difference).
I’m not sure how Ros feels about solids judging by the faces he was making yesterday. He was working the cereal around in his mouth and scrunching his brow up like “What the fuck?” I think he was just putting on a show for Scott, because he’s had a bit of cereal before. Proof: he didn’t spit it out. Wher Read more:Hungry
“You’re not even listening, huh?” 2007-03-19 22:56:00 {summary}I really do think I’m losing my ever-loving mind. This morning, I had a one-sided conversation with Rosco about how he will not be dating for many, many years and that when he does date he’ll only be allowed to bring home girls that have ambitions and who don’t look like they stink. I was getting all heated and intense in the conversation, and then I remembered that he has the memory span of a goldfish and shut my trap. Read more:ldquo
, rdquo
Note to self: 2007-03-20 21:55:00 {summary}Lift toilet cover, then pee.
So much on my mind today. I’m trashing stacks of old bills and am giving myself papercuts sorting through all this shit. I’ll feel better tonight when this is all done.
On home improvement… 2007-03-20 16:01:01 {summary}As we move from room to room in renovating our house, we’ve been changing out all the outlet jacks, switches, and plate covers. It’s a small, inexpensive change but a little clean white piece of plastic can do so much for a wall (where in the past it was simply a place where you can see how many different colors of paint the previous owners had been experimenting with because they were quite sloppy and painted over all the outlets).
We’ve been buying switches that are as flat as possible so that they sort of recede into the wall. Arguably, they’re better looking than traditional switches but they burn my biscuits for the following two reasons:
1) When you’re trying to find a flatter switch in the dark, it’s more likely you’ll get dirty handprints all over your paint job. With a switch that has a nose that protrudes a bit, you can just hover your hand an inch off the wall in the general area and find it with Read more:hellip
Play nice! 2007-03-21 22:09:00 {summary}Yesterday we went to Target because I couldn’t resist the siren call of the big red bull’s eye sign as I passed by the shopping center driving home. I did have an excuse this time, though - Rosco needed springy clothes. We drove out to a flooring showroom yesterday and by the time we got there the poor baby was drenched in his own sweat sitting in the car seat. True, he was wearing a turtle neck and corduroy pants, but to my credit when I dressed him yesterday it was kind of nipply out. Most of his clothes were undergoing the washing cycle at the time, so…
We found a LOT of cute little boy stuff in Target, but you’ll have to believe me when I say there was three times as much little girl stuff. It makes me want to drop everything I’m doing and have a little girl now, that’s how cute it all is. Then I remembered that I would have to strategically plan the birth of our next kid just on the off chance that
The sun’ll come out… 2007-03-23 20:09:00 {summary}Since we’re supposed to see temperatures of around 80 degrees today here in North Kakilaky, I figured it’d be as good a time as any to dress R in some shorts. Today he’ll be showing off his legs...until he spits up all over his clothes, anyway. As you can see from the picture, he’s already laid a plop of spit on my old Annie shirt that I had to wrestle out with a baby wipe.
I like the shirt on him. It seems more or less unisex and the holes pulled by the wash cycle yesterday add a nice vintage flair, don’t you think?
.
.
.
. Read more:hellip
At least I don’t own “mom Jeans.” 2007-03-23 18:43:01 {summary}I noticed this morning that during the course of my pregnancy and the subsequent post-partum period that my entire wardrobe has become outmoded. To be honest, it wasn’t all that fashionable to start with. My last full-time job required me to wear professional attire four days each week. On &ldquo
;casual Friday,&rdquo
; I’d wear blue jeans and one of my few t-shirts that were presentable enough to be seen in on the off chance that a client would drop by.
As my current work situation is decidedly more casual, I don’t spend a lot of time worrying about clothes. In general, if it’s clean and fits I’ll wear it out. Only recently as Rosco has become easier to carry on outings and I go out more have I noticed how crappy my selection really is. It’s so crappy that my husband currently commandeers more closet space than me. Yeah, I’ll give you a minute to recover from the shock of that. I’m Read more:least
, Jeans
Vintage! 2007-03-23 07:54:01 {summary}I was putting away some of R’s laundry earlier, and while I was in front of the closet, a white kitchen garbage bag caught my eye. It’s a bag of my old baby clothes my grandma tucked away and returned to me when I was pregnant. I didn’t even know the baby’s sex yet when I got it, but thought it would be cute if he/she got to wore stuff I wore t*coughcough*ty-something years ago. Well, Rosco is obviously a boy, so he won’t be wearing much of it (there is a vintage Little Orphan Annie shirt in there I’m on the fence about. Do you think a boy could wear it? It’s navy blue.)
Well, in the bag o’ stuff was also this Gerry Cuddler baby carrier. When I pulled it out I had to scratch my head. Obviously I didn’t go through this stuff last year or I would have caught this. I thought it was one of my old Cabbage Patch doll carriers. Nope, this thing is made for people. I cri Read more:Vintage
“Is that a dimple? That’s TOTALLY a dimple.” 2007-03-23 04:06:01 {summary}Lately I’ve been examining Rosco and trying to make heads or tails of who he looks like. It’s so damned easy to tell with other peoples’ kids - you take one look at them and say, &ldquo
;Yup. Looks just like his no-good daddy,&rdquo
; or “Wow, so-and-so really spit that one out, eh?”
Maybe it’s because I don’t spend much time looking at myself in the mirror (and why should I? I still look as haggard and rough as I did yesterday. I’m not expecting a miracle to happen overnight.), but I just don’t see where The Kid looks like me. Or maybe because I don’t believe I was ever that cute.
I went through my digital photo stash and did a very unscientific analysis of his features. As he gets bigger and the weeks progress, he’s looking more and more like a little boy and less like a baby. Whereas before, his trip through the birth canal made his features appear to be a bi
Mommies unite! 2007-03-24 18:00:00 {summary}If you scroll down and take a look at my sidebar, you’ll see a link for Triangle Mommies. It’s a site where moms in my area can network, relate, and plan group activities. I signed up when I was pregnant and pent up in the house feeling sorry for myself and was able to get a lot of the support I needed to help prepare for R’s birth. There’s someting visceral about getting advice from people that live a short drive away from you. I know that if I say “I was down at the Southpoint Target...” they’ll know exactly where I’m talking about and can picture it in their heads. I’ve learned so many things from these women, such as how to make a tender meatball (soak the bread in milk first), where to find an awesome pediatrician (thanks, Beth), and how to watch American Idol (angrily, with many snarls directed at Sanjaya’s hair). Being able to commiserate in this format keeps my mommy-insanit Read more:unite
Musings on spanking 2007-03-24 08:11:00 {summary}I went to A.C. Moore tonight to pick up a few sheets of cardstock and decorative paper to make my mom a get well card. While I was in the aisle grabbing clearance paper (yes, about 90% of the stock is on clearance) hand over fist, a family walks down in search of a certain sheet of paper (meaning one piece of paper: they obviously have greater self-control than myself).
While I was trying very hard to appear aloof and just mind my business, sometimes it’s hard to prevent yourself from conducting observation. In the family there were two girls (women, ostensibly, but judging by their behavior I think the term “girl” is sufficient), a toddler belonging to one of the girls, and the girls’ mother (or mother-like person).
By most accounts I’d say that the little boy was fairly well behaved. He wasn’t trying to pull paper out of the displays; he wasn’t throwing a little screaming fit. I’m trying to remember Read more:Musings
Well fuck it, it’s bedtime now. 2007-03-26 05:42:00 {summary}The kid.
Oh, the kid. He’s been up since 10:30 and hasn’t had a nap.
I can’t get him to keep his eyes shut long enough to transport him from where he’s fallen asleep to his crib. He’s cranky because he hasn’t napped, but won’t sleep because he’s cranky.
Cry, cry, cry.
Momma annoyed.
Oh, hush. 2007-03-27 00:43:00 {summary}Rosco’s nap schedule has blown up like an overstuffed toilet in a Mexican restaurant. Up until daylight savings he was taking at least two naps each day ranging from 1 1/2 to 2 hours, sometimes longer. Now he nurses to sleep and the moment I set his little back down on the crib his puffy, swollen, sleepy eyelids spring open and he’s got his second wind.
As I began typing this he was in his crib babbling on and on about what a bad mother I am. You see, Momma got annoyed that he didn’t want to nap and would instead try to gnaw on the Star Trek novel she was trying to read, so Momma set him down in the crib, gave him his stuffed Piglet to beat up, and left the room.
I was all set to just let him “cry it out” for five minutes or so while I asked Dr. Google why my ear has been stuffy for two months. I even set a timer to make sure it wasn’t longer than that. He cried for about three minutes and then babbled (angr
Little girl drugged to death by asshole parents 2007-03-26 20:10:00 {summary}This is absolutely ridiculous:
Rebecca — who had been diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity and bipolar disorder, or what used to be called manic depression — died Dec. 13 of an overdose of prescribed drugs, and her parents have been arrested on murder charges, accused of intentionally overmedicating their daughter to keep her quiet and out of their hair.
The little girl’s doctor diagnosed her with ADHD and bipolar disorder when she was TWO based on family history.
Family history or not, how can anyone ascertain that a two-year-old is hyperactive? Seriously?! Have you ever been around a two-year-old? Unless they’re highly sedated they’re a handful most of the time - they’re inquisitive, curious, and are eager to test their limits with you. What shocks me so much is just how much medication these parents were giving their little girl. There’s no way they can lie and say that they didn’t understan Read more:death
, asshole
Six years and one kid later.. 2007-03-30 10:24:00 {summary}Sometimes I wish we’d had a wedding. I don’t know why, seeing as how there are very few people that I like well enough to invite and spend that much money for the event for. Hell, there are people in my immediate family I wouldn’t invite (seeing as how they’d rather mastermind things and step all over your toes than sit and observe). If my grandmother had her way we’d be in a sweltering church filled with her friends and church “family” and I’d be gritting my teeth and wishing the whole thing was over with. I figured that’d be a pretty crappy memory to have of what’s supposed to be the most magical day of your life (up to that point). I guess part of me can’t let go of that whole big-white-dress and ride-in-limosine thing.
If I weren’t so chickenshit we would have gone somewhere tropical and have gotten barefoot on a beach with a couple of island natives as our witnesses.&nb Read more:later
I’m [not] bringing sexy back. 2007-03-29 10:49:01 {summary}Combed my hair today. While that may not sound like a big deal to most people, you should remember that I haven’t run comb nor brush through it since I was about 6 months pregnant. Rosco is 18 weeks old. You do the math.
Okay, I didn’t comb all of it. I just ratted out the ends and the stuff around the edges, hence the poufy ponytail ball. I don’t have the upper body strength to fuck around with the dreadlocks that are certainly forming in the middle. Maybe in a couple of days after my head stops hurting from all the yanking I’ll reattempt contact with my scalp and go ahead and cut out the impenetrable knots.
I sort of feel like I’ve let myself go. I look in the mirror some mornings and think “Damn, do I really look like that?” I feel downright schlubby* and on some days actually feel bad about it. On other days I ponder why anyone would give a shit about whether or not I’ve pl
A good stink. 2007-03-30 22:43:00 {summary}My house stinks, but it’s a good stink. We had kielbasa last night, and not wanting to use last night to break in the charcoal grill for the first time this year I just boiled them and then seared them with my cast iron grill pan.
We used to have this awesome stove that had a built-in grill and an exhaust system that vented under the house. Unfortunately, it was a relic the previous owners left and it was fucking disgusting, not to mention hard to use because it only had two burners. The cost of adding a two-burner cartridge and replacing the grill half would be the same as the cost of buying a new stove. So we bought a new stove. Unfortunately, we have to use the vent fan on the microwave to circulate the air when we fry things.
It doesn’t work very well. It sort of just blows smoke around the kitchen. It’s a good thing Rosco doesn’t have a decent bedtime, because he’d certainly be kept awake by the s
*theme music plays quietly in the background* 2007-03-30 21:22:01 {summary}Alas, the torture is over and I can throw out the battered, stained Post-it note that’s been adhered to my desktop for the past several weeks. Triangle Mommies‘ Biggest Loser contest ends today and I’ve just submitted my final weight.
I pumped off my engorged boob, stripped out of my clothes, and stepped on the scale for one last time (the scale will now be hidden in some inconspicuous corner).
I’m pleased to report that I’ve lost all of my pregnancy weight plus a little more. By the last few weeks of pregnancy, I had gained a total of forty pounds (I’m 5’2"). But alas, pregnant women are not fat, so I didn’t stress it. When I did start stressing was after I had the baby and I knew that not only did I have all that pregnancy weight to lose, but also the weight that I had been carrying around pre-pregnancy that Lupron Depot shots I took for six months caused me to gain. When I got pregnant I hadn& Read more:background
It just seems so obvious now. 2007-04-02 00:03:00 {summary}Sometimes I’m astounded by my own genius (and humility).
Scott and I were taking Rosco on an outing yesterday (more on that later) and I needed to pack a bottle to take along because I generally don’t enjoy nursing in public.
I don’t like putting rings and nipples on full bottles because no matter how careful you are, milk always seeps out for some reason. Instead, I pack the bottles with the lids that came with the breast pump and carry a nipple and ring separately in a baggie.
Being fresh out of little baggies yesterday (carrying a nipple in a quart freezer bag is just a waste), I scoured the pantry for anything else I could use. I was about to wrap the whole contraption in plastic wrap when I found a half-box of those miniature 4-oz. Glad containers. I used to use them for toting salad dressing back when I was in the workforce and carrying salads for lunch.
I put the nipple and ring in, sealed it up, and was good to go. W
WTH? 2007-04-01 10:48:00 {summary}If there are any sophisticated ExpressionEngine users out there that can tell me why my full month of entires doesn’t show up when the month links are clicked, please let me know. We poor, free users don’t get tech support.
Never mind. Apparently if you get pissed enough about something you’re able to figure it out.
Family Outing: Duke Gardens 2007-04-03 21:37:01 {summary}We rarely get out as a family. I don’t know if that’s going to turn out to be socially detrimental to Rosco in the long run or not, but it’s not exactly like he’s cloistered here. He sees other babies a couple of times each week and usually comes along with me on any excursion that’s longer than an hour.
Because he is our first baby and we’re scared/overprotective of taking him out to places we don’t know are baby-friendy, a lot of the time we just stay home and let the weekends pass us by. We don’t want to be that family in a restaurant that is so selfish about wanting to resume thier pre-baby social life that they allow the displeased baby to scream and ruin everyone else’s meal. Sure, they have a right to be there, but because I actually have manners I balk at the fact that they’d be so rude as to not remove thier child from the situation until he or she calmed down.
Oops...I didn Read more:Family
, Gardens
Rollin’ Rollin’ Rollin’ 2007-04-03 08:03:00 {summary}For a baby who hates tummy time so much, Rosco sure spent a lot of time on his belly today. After this morning’s crib corralling, he figured out how to turn over all the way - back to front AND front to back. What the hell? That’s not supposed to happen on the same day!
Of course I’d been carrying a camera around all day on the off chance he’d roll all the way over, but I wasn’t holding my breath. He hasn’t really practiced this before now so I’m absolutely stunned. Just yesterday Scott was commenting that he wish that I gave the baby more tummy time, and I rolled my eyes because he’s not the one who has to listen to him cry because he can’t move.
Here’s him practicing his roll and being cute:
“noonie noo noo noo.”
“Hey, what’s over there?”
“Oh, the cat. Now what?”
“*drool*"
I suppose his “holy terror” phas Read more:Rollin
Um, where ya going? 2007-04-02 21:08:00 {summary}Okay, I feel really, really bad about this, but part of motherhood is all about deciding whether to take a picture of your child screaming because they’ve scared themselves or to immediately pick them up and soothe them. I chose the former, and really, I’m crying on the inside about it.
Ros is pretty much beyond needing to be nursed to sleep for naps (night is another issue altogether). During the day I simply set him down in his crib when he starts rubbing his eyes. Usually there are no waterworks, but he may whine for fifteen minutes or so just out of habit.
Today I wanted to start shifting his nap schedule so that when he goes down for his late-afternoon snooze he’d be awake in enough time to put a sizeable gap between that nap and his bedtime. You see, momma bear would like to have some non-Rosco time before bed, so…
Well, anyway, I put him down for his nap and as it was a few minutes earlier than the norm he was still
Exhausted. 2007-04-05 06:41:00 {summary}Here’s chubby baby legs to distract you while I drink beer and resent people who nap.
Cat, if it weren’t illegal I’d beat you. 2007-04-06 20:44:01 {summary}I’m kidding.
No I’m not.
Yes, I am. Though, I’m sick of this cat. My t.v. room smells like unidentified cat biomatter and I can’t find it (Scott can’t smell it because he has “man” nose). She’s always picking a fight with my older cat, and they knock over furniture and wake the kid up. Since we painted, she’s been marking all over the place, and we’ve been covering it up with that “Feliway” stuff. Now the place smell like pee and Feliway.
DH wants to do everything he can to keep her as if we’ll be sent straight to hell if we take her back to the shelter. We’ve been trying to get her right since she was a kitten and have had her for almost two years. She won’t. Stop. Peeing. On/In/Around. My. Stuff.
Don’t know what else to do but to lock her up in her own turret. If it’s because she sees the s Read more:illegal
Broken 2007-04-05 23:37:01 {summary}
Well, that’s one way to avoid doing the dishes.
Damn, I’ve had that bowl since freshman year of college. Read more:Broken
hopping down the bunny trail 2007-04-07 17:15:00 {summary}I’m up with the early birds and worms today. Last night I got a mini-migraine around seven o’clock. One advil and half a beer later, I waved “night-night” to the baby, disappeared into the bowels of the house, and put my head under a pillow. I was terrified that I’d wake up and realize I had a stroke (long story short, my mom had a stroke last month and thought it was a sinus headache), but I was too tired to give a shit about myself at that point.
I didn’t hear any panicky, shrieking screams so I guess the baby was too tired to give Scott too much resistance.
Lots of stuff to do today. I finally redeemed some cooking class gift certificates Scott gave me for Christmas 2005, so a friend is driving up and we’re going to go do a wine tasting and nosh on miniature food items (I think the course description actually said “small plates of food” so we’ll probably be hitting a McDonalds on the way Read more:hopping
Eat me. 2007-04-07 06:16:00 {summary}And so the holiday cooking has begun. While these meaty fall vegetables don’t really scream “Easter!” they were the best-lookin’ items I could score at the grocery store for vegetarian consumption.
I made two pans of veggie lasagne - one for me, and one to give to friends. It was pretty tasty if I might say so. It’d go great with chewy bread, half a bottle of wine, and the current screwy cold weather.
Snarky Momma’s Veggielicious Lasagna
-2 eggs
-1-15 oz container of ricotta
-Half a large thingie of grated parm (the size between warehouse club size and itty-bitty-college-dorm-room size)
-Regular-sized pouch of shredded mozzarella
-Regular-sized pouch of shredded sharp cheddar
-1 yellow sweet onion
-1 eggplant
-1 smallish yellow squash
-1 green pepper
-Half a doohickey of ‘shrooms
-1-14.5 oz can of diced tomatoes
-1 large jar of pasta sauce of your choice (don’t be a cheap-ass)
-1 package of lasagne noodles
deep breaths, deep breaths 2007-04-09 09:44:01 {summary}I think I almost just had a baby-caused heart attack.
I was sitting here at my computer (as always) and I heard a frightened yelp and wail from the baby’s room. It sounded like the boogie man had snuck up and scared the shit right out of him. Of course, in true superhero style, I jumped up and sprinted down the hallway in three leaps and threw his door open.
He was lying there sprawled in the same flippin’ position I put him down in two hours ago with his eyes opened into narrow slits giving me the “Um, can you please get out?” look.
It’s a good damn thing I have low blood pressure.
Cozi Central: a scheduling tool parents can really use 2007-04-10 15:00:00 {summary}When the opportunity to review Cozi as a member of PBN presented itself, I figured it’d be just another electronic calendar designed to frustrate the hell out of me (frankly, any calendar that doesn’t have the physical ability to put a foot on my ass and push it in gear frustrates me. Ideally, I’d have a robot for this purpose, however there hasn’t been one marketed for home use that would be any more useful than my cats. At least they scratch the door to be fed in the morning and wake us up).
I’m the consummate calendar-keeper/list-maker: I have to be organized down to the slightest detail or else I flounder while functioning with other adults. If it weren’t for the fact that I keep my Palm Pilot in my purse and study its contents voraciously before social interactions, most acquaintances I come face-to-face with would have to be content with being called “Dude!” and “Heeeyyyy, girl!”
Well, Cozi Read more:Central
, scheduling
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