Owner: Why are you stalking me? URL:www.whyrustalkingme.blogspot.com Join Date: Fri, 23 Feb 2007 15:14:14 -0600 Rating:0 Site Description: There are a million stories in the naked city. This is not one of them. Site statistics:Click here
Do you have any chapstick? My lips are real sore. 2007-03-30 08:44:00 I was on the phone with my boss. The man kept calling and calling. Finally I answered and said I can’t talk right now, is this an emergency? He said yes. I need your social. I said “wtf for?” Then I gave it to him and went back to my phone call with my boss. Ya know, the one who signs my checks and doesn't like to hold. Anyway, about a half hour later I get a text message, “are you done yet” so I called him. He was trading in his truck. The new truck he just bought TWENTY days ago. I was shaking my head trying to figure it out. Twenty short days ago (the same day I bought my new car) he bought a 2006 Ford 4 door. Three days later he had an alarm put in and had the windows tinted. Because, well, one must have tinted windows whilst one lives in the scorching desert. Anyway, we got a letter from Ford that said he needed to take it in for an inspection because whomever traded it in was from out of State. Fine. He took it down today. Mind you that up un
Nadda 2007-03-29 02:27:00 Nothing to say. busy busy busy
Bitch and moan 2007-04-02 07:42:00 So I’m working my ass off this weekend. ALL. WEEKEND.
I’m tired and my hands hurt. My keyboard at home sucks ass. It is a Belkin ergo but the buttons are so hard to push and the right space bar doesn’t respond to my light tap so I don’t get spaces between my words and then the right shift key is a bitch to push so my already injured from years and years ago pinky on my right hand is achy and sore and on top of that, I start getting irritated and cranky, and then I hit the wrong buttons trying to backspace or I have too many capitalized letters or I skip the word I meant to fix and have to actually arrow over to where I need to be and the end result is me wanting to punch the shit out of this piece of fuck keyboard and that will certainly not help me one little bit. While I am certainly no fan of Microsoft, I have to admit that my ergo keyboard from Microsoft is far superior to this one. Which is why I took it to work to use. Because I am too nice. Then, 6 month Read more:Bitch
Aunt Flo. I fucking hate that bitch. (men, look away or be scarred forever more) 2007-04-04 02:02:00 I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: if my youngest had been first, she would have been last. I love her to death, but honestly, the pregnancy sucked. I am not one of those people who enjoy being pregnant. I didn’t get all gaga and shit and all “oh look at me, how cute I look with a little belly.” Instead, I was more like “Jesus fuck husband! Look at this gigantic ass and my swollen elephant feet and hands and face. If you ever touch me again I swear to God I will go Jerry Springer on your ass.” I was sick the whole pregnancy. She tried drilling through my right leg to get out and I had daily pain from the 5th month until she was born. She kicked so hard I swore she was going to kick a whole right through my stomach and jump right out. My epidural numbed my legs and ass to the point that I couldn’t even roll myself over. I must have looked like Besse after a night of cow tipping. Help help. I can’t roll back over. Help help. But it left my Read more:fucking
Offensive 2007-04-05 20:17:00 9 came storming into the bathroom this morning while I was putting on my makeup. She was obviously disgusted and pissed. She said “Mom, tonight can we PALEEEESS have a family meeting?” I asked about what. She said “About 7. She is a gross, disgusting pig.” I said okay. What did she do? She said “Mom, she keeps farting and then waiving it at me like this.” (Insert butt in air, both hands waiving in a semicircular manner, as if swooshing water around in a bathtub.) I tried to suppress a smile. I tried really, really hard. I bit my lip and said “well, you used to do the same thing to her. Remember when I said she was going to get bigger some day and you were going to be sorry?” She said “Mom. I am NINE. YEARS. OLD. I have not farted and waived for a very long time. She is offensive to me.” I was taken aback. I said “she is offensive to you? Do you know what that means?” She said “yes. It means she is a gross, disgusting pig Read more:Offensive
The last four days 2007-04-10 07:28:00 Friday I worked and then a lot of nothing. Friday night, more of said nothingness. Saturday. I was woken up by the man because his crew came over to put four trees in the back yard. First of all, I am not a morning person. Second of all, I am really not a sevenfuckingthirty AM kind of a gal on any day, especially a Saturday. If I could wake up at oh, say, elevenish on the weekend, I’d be all over it. Needless to say, I was cranky. Then I had to go shopping. Which makes me even crankier. The dramas didn’t want to go with me and this perked me up just a little. I could go, do the shopping, fill the car with gas, deposit the man’s check, maybe get a cup of coffee, enjoy some peace, solitude, and perhaps stroll through the garden department (after all, the crew was already here, a few more flowers wouldn’t hurt anyone, they could run the water line all at once. I was planning ahead.) All for naught. My mom wanted to go and get some things, and bla fucking bla
A meme from AVITABLE 2007-04-13 23:04:00 Ask and ye shall receive! I get to answer quasi interview questions from that snuggle bear Avitable. Can you say “Lucky!” in your best Napoleon Dynamite voice?
1. What's the nastiest thing a guy has ever asked you to do? Did you? Hmm. Once my boyfriend asked me to let him pee between my legs, while I was already sitting on the toilet, actually peeing. No, I didn’t let him and not just because I was afraid he would pee all over me in a drunken stupor. But I did marry him.
2. Are you a cuddler? No. I am more of a smaker arounder. Although I do like to hold hands. Actually, while I don’t cuddle with the man, I do take all I can get from my kids, because it is only a matter of time until they won’t want to claim me, let alone touch me so, I’m getting while the gettin’s good.
3. Why do you blog? It is the only contact I have with the outside world. I don’t know. Because I can? Because I like to spew forth my thoughts and bitches and feelings. Not to me
Horrorscope 2007-04-16 18:50:00 Libra: Stepping all over someone else's dream won't help yours come true any quicker. Remember, if your tongue threatens to run away from your sense of common courtesy, keep quiet. You'll be glad you exercised some restraint.
This is soooo going to test my limits today...
Reason #894294 2007-04-17 22:23:00 ...why I don’t like my mother in law. I would say I hate her, but that is a strong word and while I can tolerate her in small doses, I do not really like her. 9 had an award ceremony today for placing on the Honor Roll. She has never NOT been on the honor roll and it damn near killed her that she didn’t make the President’s List (because she got one “big fat B mom. I might as well drop out”). 7 got special permission from her teacher to attend the ceremony. I think she is probably the teacher’s pet and I’m okay with that. 7 believes that she spends a lot of time in her sister’s shadow so every little thing she does on her own give me pause for joy. Anyway, we are sitting in the cafeteria waiting for the ceremony to begin and MIL said “7, my god, look at your fingernails. They are filthy. Don’t you bathe?” I took a deep breath and 7 said “I don’t stink do I?” Love that kid. Then MIL made another comment about 7’s hair cut. Which Read more:Reason
Bitch and Moan 2007-04-19 21:34:00 I hate my life and greedy people and that I don’t have time for shit and it is making me cranky. Not cranky enought to go kill people or abuse my children or alcohol, but cranky. I need to find the elusive balance and I can’t seem to get it right. I work (too much), I spend time with the family (not enough), I need to study (because I am a sadist) and I want to read a trashy novel and watch the last FIVE episodes of 24 that I have on TiVo. Yet, when I sit down at my desk at work or here at home, I just want to go to sleep. I have so much to do, that I don’t want to do any of it. I have lost my focus. I love my work. I love my attorneys (for the most part) and I enjoy the office (for the most part). Yet, I am so stressed and overwhelmed that it is making me tired and distracted and not at all productive. I cannot even begin to go into my stressors from work, because by gawd, I’m no Dooce. I cannot get fired and then support my family from my blog. Ha! I would h Read more:Bitch
Its friday ya ya ya 2007-04-21 03:10:00 I totally forgot today was Friday. The man just sent me a text message asking if I wanted to do something tonight. I said "on a school night?" He wants to take me to dinner and asked when I was leaving. I know what he’s thinking. Perv.
So, I’m working all weekend. I have worked 12 hours days this whole week, spent my breaks reading a few blogs and eating lunch at my desk making up the only contact I have with the outside world. And for what? So I can work all weekend. Fuck me. I spent the whole week on pleadings and certificates of service on nine cases with between 20 and 45 defendants. That is a fuckton of paper people. I have a shitload of work to do too - and I don’t want to do any of it. I especially don’t want to do it at home this weekend or every night next week. Thing is, I have to get it all done by Thursday. And I still need to shop for 9’s birthday because it is Sunday. I haven’t bought her shit yet. We got a trip to Disney Land for
L.I.V.I.D. 2007-04-25 07:55:00 I am so fucking pissed right now. I don’t know if I can even put it coherently into words. Where to begin?
Last week I was on the receptionist’s computer looking for a letter she had typed. The computer froze and when it restarted, Limewire popped up and did wtfever it does when it starts up and connects to its network. My personal thoughts on music downloads and file swapping and sharing aside, we are a fucking legal office. The last thing I need is the problems that would come from my receptionist sitting on her fat ass all day downloading music to the work computer. So, I deleted all 87 of her songs, videos and one full fucking movie. Then I uninstalled the software and set up her log on as a limited user. I cannot figure out how to make it so she cannot download at all. I’m working on that. I didn’t say anything to her though. Which I should have. My bad for thinking she would get the fucking hint. We’re a law office. HELLOOOOOO?
Moving on to this afternoon
An Oldie but a Goodie 2007-04-24 08:14:00 I got this in an email today. It made me laugh and I can't help but nod my head in agreement...
Three things to think about:
1. Cows
2. The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments
COWS: Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a single cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves right to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country.
THE CONSTITUTION: They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq . Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore.
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS: The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this: You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery", and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers Read more:Oldie
Post 2007-05-31 18:47:00 Update: I am going to leave this post up for another month. Then it is coming down. If you have not updated your blogroll, please do so now.If you haven't been here in a while and did not realize that I left, please click this link and you will be taken to my new home.Have a lovely day/night/weekend.UTBM
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