Rock gardens and neighbourhood watch... 2008-03-31 20:41:00 The gardener started building a rock garden today. It was going to be a bog garden but sense prevailed when the first blow of his pick axe hit solid bedrock. You could hear the clang six streets away. It took another ten minutes for him to stop vibrating.Shifting large rocks around is difficult work which is why we birds never do it, I tookthe opportunity to dive in and consume any worms and bugs that were uncovered in the process of moving the boulders. After a full morning of this I was bigger than most of the boulders.We birds have set up a neighbourhood watch
group. If any of us spots a cat acting suspiciously (do they everact in any other way?) we hoot like an owl to alert all the other birds ... this has caused our resident owl to think he's being overrun with other owls but that can
Knees, insects and sprinklers... 2008-03-30 14:47:00 It's still warm for autumn, the gardener is still in shorts and sandals much to the delight of the mosquitoes.Because the weather has been so dry the worms aren't showing themselves but there are plenty of spiders and insects around. Personally, I can never bring myself to eat spiders. They look up at you with those big eyes, all eight of them, and my heart melts. Besides who'd want to eat a spider when there's left-over ham sandwiches on the bird-table? There seems to be cats everywhere at the moment and I have to take extra care when on the ground. Thanks to our black plumage we blackbirds blend in perfectly with the shady areas of the garden .... or at least we would if whoever designed us hadn't given us bright orange beaks! It was obviously a cat lover.The dry spell means the gardener Read more:Knees
Easter eggs and feasts.... 2008-03-26 20:00:00 They left an Easter
egg on the bird-table for me, the one they gave me last Easter hasn't hatched out yet!We birds get given some pretty strange things to eat, mutant gingerbread men, cakes that have gone wrongand would make good concrete blocks, and things we can't recognise at all because they've been totally cremated. We do get some real feasts from time to time. Once they prepared chicken liver pate followed by a choice of roast turkey or honey glazed ham for their dinner guests. Luckily for us birds, the guests turned out to be vegetarians and we birds got the lot! I couldn't take-off for a week.
Bird bath blues.... 2008-03-24 20:07:00 Pond-life is very interesting, but not when it's in the birdbath! When did they last clean it out?Mud is great for complexions but not so good for feathers, I'll have to find another watering hole.The Barrington-Smythes have got a heated birdbath complete with diving board, but it's alwaysreally crowded. The dotty old lady next door is growing a petunia in her birdbath and the one next doorto her has fallen on its side. I came in to land a little too quickly and knocked it over, I am trying to get my weight down!There is a bird bath three houses away but it's rather deep, sparrows have been known to disappear without trace into it, and it's almost the start of the duck hunting season so there will probably be a mallard taking up the whole thing. Looks like it's going to be a wash in a pudd
Smug cats and jumping blackbirds... 2008-03-22 17:28:00 Ratty and I couldn't believe our eyes! That rotten cat was sitting on the bird-table. We couldn't get to the food scraps, the cat was looking very smug.It didn't look so smug when it discovered Ratty and I had shot over to his food bowl and eaten all his catfood!The leaves are starting to fall from the trees - much to the gardener's dismay. He doesn't like leaves on his lawn. when he's finished raking all the leaves up I jump up and down in the tree and shake a few more lose. Drives him nuts!
The gardener's little helper... 2008-03-21 15:56:00 There was a big storm last night, the wind was so strong I went to bed in one tree and woke up in another!It was cold too. I had to borrow a sock off the clothesline.There were leaves and debris scattered all over the lawn, I could hear the gardener
guy sighing as he as he saw the mess. Still, it'll give him something to do.To help cheer the gardener up I've decided to give him a hand mulching the garden. When he's dumped a wheelbarrow load of mulch on the flower bed and goes away to get another load I dive in and spread it all around for him. Mostly over the paths, lawn and fishpond. Here he comes now... Well! That's no way to talk to the gardener's little
helper! This the gardener who built me a nest box and then mounted it on top of a rotary clothesline, brilliant! After spending one wi
Fall, flies and food... 2008-03-19 14:53:00 I was rather grumpy this morning, I got out of the wrong side of the bed. Sixty foot drop - straight down, that's enough to make anyone grumpy! Things got worse, I saw a huge cloud of flies in the distance which usually means there's something good to eat. But the flies were just following the gardener around, he'd fallen into the compost bin again. Nothing on the bird-table except for a three week old apple core. The humans must be sleeping in. I tried tap dancing on their roof to get them up but no joy. There is some suet they hung from a branch in a mesh bag so that big birds like me can't scoff it all ....
Digging for victory and bunfight at the OK corral... 2008-03-18 15:30:00 Now the damper weather has arrived I thought I might try digging for worms in the lawn. This is more difficult than digging for worms in the flower beds but is more rewarding as it drives the gardener berserk! The technique I use is to dig my beak into the lawn then thrust forward and up at the same time. This flings great clods of earth and turf up into the air causing unsightly scars in the once pristine lawn. I then have approximately four seconds toeat whatever I've uncovered before the gardener races from the house screaming abuse at me. Once he's returned inside the process starts all over again. Plenty of bread on the bird-table this morning, there goes the diet! Usual bun fight (pardon the pun) to get at it though. We all wait in the trees that are around the bird-table until she b
Survival of the fattest... 2008-03-17 14:56:00 With the colder weather things are starting to get rough on the bird-table, There's been a lot of jostling and elbowing to get at the food. I got into a fight with a starling just the other day. I had him in a headlock and was rubbing his face in some left-over porridge when I noticed a bunch of quarrelling sparrows had swooped in and eaten everything!Now as you're all aware, some birds are lucky enough to have crops where they can shovel the food inquickly and then digest it at their leisure later on. This puts us 'cropless' blackbirds at a disadvantage. I haveuntil now been attempting to store food in my cheeks, hamster style, which is fine until someone slaps you on the back, then it has a habit of all shooting out again. All that is a thing of the past, I have discovered CARGO PANTS!!!
Wimpy cats and cheers... 2008-03-16 14:48:00 The nights are definitely getting cooler, There was quite a heavy dew this morning. I saw the cat tiptoeingacross the lawn trying not to get his feet wet, what a wimp! He's still hanging around under the bird-table. I think he's waiting for some food to drop off, eg. Ratty or myself.The cooler, moist nights are bringing out the slugs and snails(slugs are just snails without the crash helmet) which is greatnews for me. Slugs and snails means free beer! Yep, thegardener's but out little containers of beer to to kill off thepests, so I get a free beer and a free meal. Waytogo!
Weighty matters ... 2008-03-15 21:22:00 I think I'm starting to put on weight. There are little tell tale signs such as not being able to see my feet and no longer being able to get airborne. Ratty says he can install a catapult system on the bird-table, as they have on aircraft carriers, to get me into the air, but I think dieting might be easier.I've joined Weight Watchers, we had our first branch meeting yesterday. I'm on a diet plan, in fact I'm on two, I wasn't getting enough food on just the one. The diet's very easy to follow - if it tastes good you can't eat it.The apple tree's leaves are starting to fall, not because it's autumn butbecause the accident-prone gardener ran into it with the motor mower. Yesterday he managed to get himself totally entangled in a non-kinking hose, that takes skill!
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Birds that live in glass houses, shouldn't! 2008-03-15 12:37:00 I managed to find my way into the glasshouse again, but I couldn't find my way out. I panicked and cannoned off the glass panes for half an hour, losing quite a bit of plumage in the process, until the gardener let me out. He made some uncalled for comments as I left, "birdbrain!" and "the sixth time this week!" were two of them. Still, I had the last laugh, he'll be cleaning poop and feathers off his tomatoes for weeks. I found Ratty, he was at the base of the bird-table gnawing away on that stale bit of bread that I threw at the cat.He must have teeth like a beaver! The humans still seem impressed that we birds can navigate over vast distances. They don't realise we use GPS.Going Places Sixthsense. Which reminds me ... I have to travel to the UK in a few weeks, I must start to strengthen Read more:Birds
, houses
Dawn chorus,apples and cats... 2008-03-14 18:15:00 Up just before dawn as usual to join in with the dawn chorus
, the humans still haven't realise that once we'vewoken them up with all our squawking we all go back to bed for four hours. Had another feed of grapes, the Purple Pooper strikes again! One of my daily chores is going around to all the fallen apples and making peckmarks in them so the humans can't eat them. Not much on the bird-table today, stale bread that was so hard I nearly bent my beak, and some coffeee cake that gave me the shakes. I kicked the rock-hard bit of bread off the bird-table and it almost took out the cat that was sitting underneath. I think the cat's name must be gerrroutofit, that's what the gardener calls out everytime he sees it. I wonder where Ratty is today?
Nibbles, mugshots, baths and rain... 2008-03-13 14:45:00 Went to Ratty's sewer for nibbles. Interesting place, I'm not too sure what I was nibbling as there was only mood lighting, which turned out to be phosphorescence from the sewerage. Ratty and I were the only ones there, if youdon't count the cockroaches. They cleaned out the bird bath today so I shot in and had a longdrink of fresh water. Then I had a bath in it to spoil the taste for all the other birds wantinga drink. I wasn't Mr Popular!It's been a long, dry summer and the guy that looks after my garden, decided to put thesprinkler on the lawn. He spent half an hour trying to find it in amongst all the junk in the garden shed and then discovered it didn't work because it was blocked up with spiders.He spent another hour taking it to pieces and cleaning it, and four hours tryingto put it
Party surprise... 2008-03-13 10:42:00 There were some party left-overs on the table this afternoon including a party tooter. It's amazing how something made out of plastic and paper can make so much noise. The cat that was sleeping under the bird-table was impressed as well!
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Autumn grapes, rats and cats... 2008-03-13 09:51:00 It's autumn here and the grapes
are ripening on the vine over the sundeck. I've been having a great time chompingaway at them. Eating the grapes also has the extra bonus of making my droppings bright purple! However, the guy that lives in the house did a little war dance when when he saw my coloured droppings all over the deck furniture. He must not like purple. I met a rat on the bird-table ( he reckons it's a rat-table ) we got on well together, we share the same interests, eating. Ratty lives in a sewer vent in the garden. He's invited me over fornibbles after six. I'll let you know how I get on. Plenty of bread on the bird-table this morning and not too crowded, only had to elbow a couple of sparrows off the table. Now the bad news. There's been a cat hangingaround! It doesn't look too Read more:Autumn
Doom and gloom. 2008-04-02 16:36:00 I think I've got the flu - aches, pains, shivers, sweating, high temperature, tiredness, lack of energy... and that's just my eyeballs. What makes it worse is that I'm on morning chorus duty all this month! I have to get up at 5am each morning when it's dark, wet and cold. We were all so depressed this morning we sang a dirge. The gloomy morning light even caused me to have a fight with my own reflection yesterday, veryembarrassing, especially as the reflection won! Daylight saving ends this weekend so maybe things will improve with the lighter mornings.
Hurricane Henry strikes again... 2008-04-05 18:55:00 After two days of the flu I'm now feeling better and very, very hungery. On the bird-table today was a choice ofthree types of bread., wholemeal, white or homemade. It wasn't a difficult choice - I ate all three. It lookslike I'm going to be a flightless bird for a while! The cat showed its ugly face again today, I managed to accidentlydrop some old bones from the bird-table on to its head. I'm hoping that one day they'll put an anvil on thethe bird-table. The gardener has been out and about destroying things in the garden yet again. What's the oppsite of green thumbs? Black and blue fingers? He does almost as much damage to himself as he does to the plants. He did some pruning last week and by the time he'd finished both he and the garden looked like they'd been hit by Hurricane Henry
. Th
Aerial acrobatics 2008-04-07 02:51:00 I was digging a few holes in the lawn the other day when this guy rushes out of the house screaming and yellingat me. What's the big deal about a few little holes his otherwise pristine lawn? Admittedly, he did just about disappear down one of the larger holes I had dug as he chased me away, but still, there was no need for that sort of language! I got my revenge by waiting until the big football game was about to start on the television and then I bounced up and down on the TV aerial. He didn't get a decent signal for the whole of the match. The TV repair man he called in the next day must have cost him quite a bit of money as well.
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, Aerial
Away for two weeks ... 2008-04-09 18:54:00 The people who own the cat are going away for a holiday. They put out two week's worth of food for us birds on the bird-table. I managed to eat the whole lot before they'd left and they had to put out some more, which I'm working my way through now. I'm starting to look like Jabba the Hutt from Star Wars!I've eaten so much I won't be able to fly for at least a week, I'd be a sitting duck for the cat but I needn't worry about that because they've taken the cat to a cattery. The cat DID NOT WANT TO GO.The cat realised something was up when he saw them packing their suitcases. He hid under some spiky bushes, but all us birds took great delight in pointing the cat out to the people. The combination of flailing claws and a spiky shrub took its toll on the cat's owners, I imagine they'll be payi
Back again and the price of bread... 2008-04-28 16:44:00 They're back! About time too, I'm convinced eating a natural diet of bugs, worms and seeds can't be good for you. Give me a piece of left-over pizza anytime. At one point I was forced to join Ratty in the compost heap rummaging around for food scraps. Birds, I discovered, are not designed for burrowing into rotting heaps of vegetation. We have too many sticky out bits and flappy bits. I came out of the compost heap looking like I'd been through a muck spreader!The only down side with them coming back from holiday is that they've brought the cat back with them. After all the trouble they had getting the cat into the cattery they were rather surprised to find when they went to collect itthat it didn't want to leave. At $70 a week it did not get a choice in the matter and was dragged kicking Read more:price
Wind and rain... 2008-05-03 21:34:00 The leaves are still falling and so is the rain, will it ever stop?The good news is the cat won't come out of the house when it's raining, he doesn't do wet. But even he's starting to go stir crazy, I saw him climbing up the curtains and attacking the pot plants on the window sill yesterday.Just to make things worse a strong wind has come up from the west. It was so strong they had to nail the breadonto the bird-table to stop it blowing away! Coming into land on a small bird-table when it's gusting forty knots isn't easy. I've ended up in a nearby shrub a couple of times. I've discovered the best technique is to come in withfull flaps down, stall, plummet down onto the food scraps and hang on to what ever I can grab before the wind whisks me away again. Roll on summer!
Pardon my poor eyesight ... 2008-05-05 16:22:00 Blackbird's ears leave something to be desired. You've probably noticed thatour ears don't stick out like they do on most animals, plus they're covered infeathers, a big no no in the ear design world. The humans don't realise that theconstant peeping sound we make while hopping around is us saying "What?" "Pardon
?" "Eh?" Since our ears are so useless we do rely rather a lot on our eyes to keep ussafe from scumbag cats. The twitch of a bush is enough to send me squawkinginto the air in a high state of panic. So you can imagine my dismay at learning that Imay need glasses! I discovered this fact while I was having a long conversationwith a hedgehog, which turned out to be a scrubbing brush. It rather looks likeI may need to rely on my sense of smell from now on.
Cat flaps and dumb cats... 2008-05-07 19:07:00 I accidentally flew in through an open window yesterday. This panicked the occupants somewhatwhich in turn panicked me. I flapped around the house shedding most of my plumage and crashinginto every closed window I could find which caused me to do several poops on the window sills.The flustered occupants flung open every window they could and eventually I found my way outside again.Phew! They'll have enough feathers in there to fill three cushions.Good news, they've installed a cat flap for me so I can go in and out of the house when ever I want to.I know that the cat flap's for me because their cat is too stupid to use it. The cat prefers to miaowuntil someone opens the door and let's him in.This blog now has a cult following!They call themselves "The people who believe cartoon characters
Sneak preview... 2008-05-11 16:31:00 A sneak preview of my adventures in China. Now I'llmake even less sense to you than before! If I'm a big successin China the blue bird of happiness could soon be out of a job.Black is the new blue!
Google Earth a bird's eye view... 2008-05-13 19:04:00 The incompetent gardener has been at work again.He tried to build a rock wall but it continually collapsed on to his toes and I learnt some new words.It's amazing what you can see from up here at the top of a Norfolk pine. There's a dog chasing a cat, and the cat's owner chasing the dog. There's a lady trying to hang a large sheet on the washing line but the wind's flapping it around like a spinna Read more:Earth
, Google
, Google Earth
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