Owner: Confessions of an Insomniac URL:http://www.confessionsofaninsomniac.com Join Date: Sat, 26 Jan 2008 12:20:19 -0600 Rating:0 Site Description: Jennifer admits to sleeping very little in her nights away from the office. Without much sleep, Jennifer makes no excuses for what is likely to come out of her mouth in Confessions of an Insomniac. Get ready for an absurd look at the things in life that r Site statistics:Click here
My mind is already on vacation 2008-03-03 16:53:25 After wandering aimlessly through the parking lot for more than an hour yesterday, I realized that I am in serious need of a vacation. I passed the Girl Scouts selling cookies at least six times. They gave their spiel forgetting that I had already turned them down five times. One little girl recognized me and asked [...]
Half of an eyebrow 2008-02-27 16:47:19 I have invented a stress gauge …
Well, sort of, it only works on me.
My friends and family are able to gauge how stressed I am by how many hairs are left in my eyebrows. The more that are missing, the more stressed I am. By the end of a stressful week, I am lucky to [...]
Life in the slow lane 2008-02-25 21:00:40 The September nights have faded, but the speeding ticket that was handed to me on that horrible Monday still lingers. It is amazing how much of my life has been determined by a stupid piece of paper.
On the right path?
Until recently, “careful” and “cautious” were two words that never fit in my vocabulary. I was [...]
Be kind, please rewind 2008-02-18 12:26:55 Now playing in VHS …
Three people sit in a dark room laughing hysterically at a TV screen. Next to them is a box of video tapes. Each is labeled with a name to identify the life playing out on the screen.
You watch as one person picks out a new tape. “Can we watch this one again? I [...] Read more:rewind
The anti-Valentine parade 2008-02-11 16:52:40 Valentine’s Day is the Hallmark holiday that has been shoved down our throats since grade school. Could this be as bad as getting McDonald’s to sponsor report cards?
Valentines of all shapes and sizes circulate the classrooms as teachers force students to celebrate the holiday. Each student has an elaborately decorated valentine box that he or [...] Read more:Valentine
Am I losing my mind? 2008-02-10 22:44:47 The answer is probably …
I could list 1,000 reasons why it feels like an animal is chewing on the side of my head, but I definitely think the latest proof that I have lost touch with reality takes the cake.
I was just in the laundry room getting out some clothes from the dryer. I noticed that [...]
A raccoon pooped on my porch 2008-02-05 19:00:09 Is it burglars?
Around 2:30 a.m. Monday, I woke to a loud scraping noise outside my window. The sound was followed by a loud hissing. I jumped from the bed and peeled back the blinds. Nothing. I almost returned to bed when I heard the sound repeat … only this time louder.
In case you are tuning in for the [...]
Blending in 2008-02-01 16:51:59 “If there is anything the non-conformist hates worse than a conformist, it’s another non-conformist who doesn’t conform to the prevailing standard of non-conformity.”
- Bill Vaughn
Traveling to different places and countries only makes us realize how little we know and understand about people, communication and relationships. While many things are very similar, we can safely conclude [...] Read more:Blending
Add 60 miles to that 2008-01-30 21:52:06 It all comes down to numbers. Geography is just an obstacle. I would never let something as simple as miles on a map get in the way of my pursuit for happiness.
Contradiction starts here …
I am not a Florida gal. I have tried to like the heat, sand and sea – it is just not [...]
Are you kidding me? 2008-01-28 22:07:37 Before the Backstreet Boys and ‘N Sync …
No longer kids and most certainly not new … New Kids on the Block are making a comeback.
15 years ago …
I had the music, posters, buttons and clothing. My walls were completely plastered with the faces of the magnificent five. I had a journal dedicated completely to my [...]
My wonderful airport painting 2008-03-16 13:31:53 People painted across a vast landscape of stores, restaurants and planes …
The airport
may not be the most picturesque place to watch people, but the fluorescent lights definitely illuminate the many lives that walk past the numbering system that we all have grown to associate with flying.
The Atlanta Airport is the melting pot of civilization. [...]
Video game addicts 2008-03-18 22:13:18 I was horrified when I saw the top story on Yahoo the other day: -ways-to-win-back-your-gaming-spouse/1194632.
This is pathetic advice and no woman should have to go to these extremes to save a marriage. No man is worth this sort of behavior. If he has completely lost touch with reality and is living in the World of [...]
I should be a comedian 2008-03-21 22:45:31 I recently came to the conclusion that I am the funniest person I know. I am not just funny – I am hilarious. I catch myself laughing out loud at my jokes all the time. I can’t contain how funny I am. It just makes me giggle thinking about it. My career path is forming [...]
Say hello to my new look 2008-03-20 21:59:57 Since I am all about making changes in my life lately, I figured the first place I should start is on my blog. The blue puffy vomit look just was not doing it for me anymore. Welcome to the new dark and gloomy look of Confessions of an Insomniac!
Virginia in pictures 2008-03-24 12:12:33 After returning from Virginia
on March 9, I was immediately rushed off to California on a business trip. This is the first chance to share pictures and stories of my trip to Virginia to visit my cuz.
As always, I had an awesome time with my cuz. He is a great host and even let me [...]
Chinny chin hairs 2008-03-26 17:02:13 I remember watching my grandmother pluck hairs
from her chin when I was a young girl. I was horrified. Would this happen to me? Would I turn into a man? My grandmother laughed and shrugged, “it’s just part of getting old.”
It’s official. I am old.
I got my first chinny chin hair the other day. I [...]
Specialization is for insects 2008-04-01 08:31:26 “A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, con a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook [...]
Hope for the Flowers 2008-04-06 21:13:54 I have a book recommendation for you …
“Hope for the Flowers
” by Trina Paulus
Life is not black and white. There is a little yellow in all of us …
Life is not simple enough to be drawn under one abstract theory, and humans cannot be defined or summed up by any one particular thought. We simply [...]
Another chapter ends 2008-04-08 16:45:07 As another chapter ends in the book of life, I look back on all the previous chapters and wonder what I could have done differently. Am I writing this book in a way that will make sense to my readers? Did I make too many typos or mistakes?
My days as a journalist are over …
Will work for food 2008-04-15 15:08:53 Two more weeks …
Knowing that I will be broke and unemployed in two weeks has made me the happiest woman alive. I am not sure why I did not do this sooner.
What is the best way to celebrate unemployment?
As I sat on the beach Saturday … wind slapping me in the face … sand ripping [...]
Changing my name 2008-04-15 15:00:45 I thought about this for an entire elevator ride …
I am changing my name to “Hope.” I will no longer go by “Jennifer.” From this day forward, everyone is to call me by my new name. Read more:Changing
The proper way to say goodbye 2008-04-20 18:49:33 With my last weekend coming to a close, I am overcome with a new realization. I am really leaving Florida.
All the joy of moving home to family and friends has completely clouded my vision to the plain and simple truth of the situation - I am about to make a big change. My life is about [...]
FREE chicken suit 2008-04-23 19:58:13 Does anyone have a need for a chicken suit? I bought it for Halloween one year. It is barely used (wore it around my apartment for less than an hour).
What is wrong with it? Besides being a chicken suit, it smells like plastic and paint.
This chicken suit needs to go by Saturday. If you are not [...]
My cat is dating an alien 2008-04-22 15:02:24 I am having the strangest dreams these days …
A window in my home reveals a magnificent skyline. I gaze upon the vast landscape … a feeling of peace washes over me. The stars twinkle as the city lights invite me to take a closer look.
With my face literally pressed to the glass, a new story [...]
No couch surfing 2008-04-24 16:46:13 I have a place to live …
Surprisingly, my new apartment is in a decent neighborhood and the rent is under $500 a month. The apartment staff did not want to rent to an unemployed college student, but they made an exception.
The negatives …
The apartment does not have a washer/dryer, dishwasher or central air/heat. It is also located [...]
Sneezing rainbows 2008-05-04 18:48:34 Without time to share detailed encounters of my trek across Florida, I will leave you with some of my fondest memories in color. I promise to fill in more once I have settled in my new home.
Colors remind me of my journey … Read more:Sneezing
How many stars are on your map? 2008-05-08 21:37:53 In my haste to shed the snake skin of journalism, I forgot some of the excitement my job offered me over the past six years.
As I taped my stupid U.S. map to the wall, I looked at all the stars
marking the cities I traveled. I was surprised to see that I have spent time in [...]
Scratch the name change 2008-05-15 23:43:20 Changing my name to Hope was a dumb idea …
You can call me Jennifer again. I suck at name changes. I forgot the first rule of changing my name … I need to actually remember the name. Read more:Scratch
Salute to journalism 2008-05-15 22:22:43 I am now a productive member of society …
I got my first job in the medical field! I start as an anesthesia tech for Huntsville Hospital on Monday.
What is an anesthesia tech?
Excellent question! I was too busy trying to make a good first impression that I forgot to ask. I am sure that whatever it is I [...] Read more:Salute
, journalism
No more yucky fleas 2008-05-19 21:10:01 I stole a kitten from my grandmother …
This sounds much worse than it is. My grandmother has Alzheimer’s. One of her neighbors (quite aware of her disease) decided to give her a kitten. So, being the good granddaughter that I am, I stole it!
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