Owner: The Crooked Shall Be Made Straight URL:http://thecrookedmadestraight.typepad.com/ Join Date: Tue, 11 Dec 2007 21:22:11 -0600 Rating:0 Site Description: A blog about teaching, keeping the faith, writing, reading, and living with Major Depressive Disorder. Site statistics:Click here
Kindness in words creates confidence 2008-03-07 19:25:24 Two things happened today that MADE my day! Lifted my spirits. Filled me up! Replenished me, even, in an energizing sort of way. 1. One of my students called me into the hall. She said she needed to talk. When we made our way outside the classroom, she began, "Ms. S, you are like a peanut butter, chocolate chip pancake breakfast. You know with all the sides: jellies and whip cream and nuts, the whole sha-bang. You're interesting and fun, and with you, there are lots of choices. Well, Ms. S, that student teacher in there RIGHT NOW, she's like plain toast for breakfast, and we don't want to eat toast! You get my drift?" "B., I think that's the NICEST thing anyone has ever said to me!" (BTW, are there such things as peanut butter pancakes? Because I could be all over that! Read more:Kindness
Replenish-ing 2008-03-05 12:19:34 My flip calendar for today reads, "I will satisfy the weary, and all who are faint I will replenish." It's from the book of Jeremiah. I am weary. I am faint. I need to be replenished. I long for satisfaction. I long to write more consistently. I long for more time and resources so I can write. I read. I listen. I rest. I pray. I try to do my part. And I wait for supernatural replenishment.
This is the flu kicking my butt! 2008-02-26 15:45:14 For days now, Ms. Emily and Charlotte Bronte and I have been in bed. No TV. No Computer. No noise. No light. We were joined by our new friends Vics Vapor Rub, Robitussin, NyQuil and a roll of toilet paper -- no Kleenex in this house. I never buy them. I don't know why. Emily slept right on top of me MOST of last week. With my temperature reaching 103.2, it was hot! All that fur and all, but I didn't have the heart to make her move. She was comforting me and taking this duty very seriously. Sweet. This is Emily's reaction to my need to turn over! Did I tell you that she weighs 18 pounds? That's a lot of cat! It was nice and cozy for the most part, but when her fur mixed with Vics Vapor Rub on my upper lip (which happened a lot), I was irritated at best and raving mad at worst! You know, you
Abundance 2008-03-12 15:57:17 Calendar flip chart for today: "God is able to provide you with every blessing in abundance, so that by always having enough of everything, you may share abundantly in every good work." The teacher across the hall gave me this calendar for my birthday back in October. I almost forgot to get it out when the new year started. Now it's on my desk, and I flip the page first thing each morning. I'm not the "flip calendar" kind of person. I would have never bought one for myself. I like wall calendars. I want to see the whole month at once, and I want unique and awesome art or photography to look at each day. I love going to Vroman's, my favorite bookstore in Pasadena, and rummaging through the calendars each January, looking for the ONE(s) I want to spend the next twelve mon Read more:Abundance
Two or three things I know for sure, Sunday Salon 2008-03-09 23:30:56 Two or Three Things I Know for Sure is a short memoir by Dorothy Allison. I read it in the bathtub! Yes, I spent a long time soaking it all in. I had to keep re-heating the water, but for some reason I couldn't get out until I had finished reading. I got out, and while I was a bit shriveled, I was moved to tears. Nothing gets me like a good story. Allison's book is only 94 pages, and it includes pictures! It's choke-full of gems, though, and the following is a list of some of my favorite lines, ones that resonated throughout my being. It's a long list for such a short book, but Allison is one amazing story teller. "Two or three things
I know for sure, and one of them is what it means to have no loved version of your life but the one you make" (3). "She (her aunt Dot) spat on Read more:Sunday
, Salon
Goin' to the mountains 2008-03-14 18:56:51 I'm off for a weekend retreat in the nearby mountains
where I won't be throwing hand grenades, but I'll be attempting to get still before God and practice the presence of Jesus. See you all when I return!
Throwing hand grenades 2008-03-13 15:50:41 Go over to Dry Bones Dance, and read her series called, "Throwing Hand Grenades at Jesus." She actually quoted me in her latest post. She is one helluva writer, and she makes me think about my faith in ways that would make my grandma roll around in her grave and point her finger at me just for considering the questions Christy raises in this series! So, check her out. My blog is B O R I N G compared to hers. I drive home from school on most days thinking, WTF, I really need to think about this or this or this. I'm not where she is in the process of deconstructing her faith, and I may never be, but the process of questioning at this level, well, it's mind blowing, and I welcome the challenge/conflict it evokes in my mushy brain!
The Believe. retreat, part 1 2008-03-19 11:24:17 280 women. All gathered in a mountain sanctuary. Voices lifted in jubilant song, clapping, dancing even. The theme of their gathering is one word: BELIEVE (period). I am tired from the drive up the mountain and still feeling dizzy from the motion sickness of swerving round and round and round each curve to get here. It is late Friday evening, and I'm still unsure about why I'm here. Then I remember the words of invitation on the brochure my friend, Karin, sent me weeks ago. retreat
: " a place of refuge, seclusion or privacy ... a period of retirement for religious exercises or meditation ... an asylum, as for the insane ..." Whatever definition suits your current situation, we invite you to join us at the CA women's retreat. I giggle under my breath. It was the word, "insane
I thought I still had time . . . 2008-03-21 02:10:05 I don't even know how to write this, so I'll just do my best. Tonight, I laid down on the couch with my computer and began to do some research for a restructuring committee that I'm on at school. I looked up block scheduling, professional learning communities, and some authors who have written great stuff about education reform, yadda. yadda. yadda. I got bored quickly. Then I had this strong urge to google the name of a gal I went to college with in Texas and later roomed with during my first two years in California. We both came out here to go to Fuller Seminary. She actually followed through and graduated with a MA in Theology and then went on to Notre Dame to get a PhD in history, and I continued a teaching career that I had begun the year before in Texas. Her birthday is March 9th, an Read more:thought
Ellen--my favorite person 2008-03-20 13:06:17 For your viewing pleasure. It's from about a year ago, so you may have missed it. I'm from Texas and went to school in Austin so it's particularly funny to me. Enjoy. Retreat, part 2 coming soon! Download ellen_1-17-07.wmv Read more:Ellen
, person
On my way to austin 2008-03-27 12:35:10 I am leaving tomorrow morning to go to Austin for Kristine's memorial service. Her family has asked me to come and read some of what I wrote about Kristine. I've been crying for nearly a week now, so I'm tired. Is it at all weird that I'm equally afraid that I won't cry while reading at her service as I am that I will cry so hard I won't be able to get through it all? Here are two songs for you to soak in. Download 04_i_will_remember_you.m4p Download 05_we_will_remember.m4p
delayed 2008-03-28 18:51:20 my flight from denver to austin was cancelled, so I'm sitting at the airport for just over 4 hours waiting for another flight on a different airline in a different terminal than where I arrived. I will arrive in austin at midnight. I'm at my emotional capacity. I'm just sayin'. by the way I'm posting this from my phone so excuse my "text" like writing. also, did you know that security will take your 4 oz hand lotion, but you can buy a 16 0z bottle of rubbing alcohol and an 8 oz bottle of hydrogen peroxide in the newstand store once you get through security. the complete irony of this fact was not lost on me. so I asked the clerk about it. she said, "airport security checks our items, too." to which I replied, "to see if it can actually blind someone!" she didn Read more:delayed
Beer o'clock 2008-04-03 19:07:35 Carrie at Fully Caffeinated has a beer each day at Beer O'Clock, and I think that is such a great idea. It makes me wish that I were a drinker, but alas, I'm not. But all day long, I've wanted to have me a Beer O'clock because it's been one of those kind of days. I'm back in California, and I've spent a few days catching my breath. Dealing with Kristine's death and all that has stirred up in me has been tough, to say the very least. I wish I had something profound to write about here, and maybe eventually I will. But, today, I'm confronting taxes and the fact that I owe money (a lot of money) to both federal and the state. I've never owed taxes before, and it is absolutely no fun. Dealing with death and taxes in one week, well, it's led me to contemplate starting my very own Beer O'clock,
Ira Says Goodbye 2008-04-07 20:47:00 It's taken me a while to process my trip to Austin, and I'm still not done, but I think I'm able to write a bit about it now. When Kristine's family called me and asked me to come and speak at her memorial, I had very mixed and intense feelings about going. After talking to a few friends, I sensed it was something God was wanting me to do. When Kristine's sister clarified the family's desires and let me know they wanted to stick to theme I had developed in my blog piece, "I thought I still had time," I felt nervous and anxious about reading my confession of how Kristine's and my relationship had ended in a terrible way and had yet to be reconciled. After a long journey to Austin (my flight connection from Denver to Austin was canceled), I arrived in Austin just after midnight Fri Read more:Goodbye
I thought I still had time . . . 2008-03-21 10:24:00 I don't even know how to write this, so I'll just do my best. Tonight, I laid down on the couch with my computer and began to do some research for a restructuring committee that I'm on at school. I looked up block scheduling, professional learning communities, and some authors who have written great stuff about education reform, yadda. yadda. yadda. I got bored quickly. Then I had this strong urge to google the name of a gal I went to college with in Texas and later roomed with during my first two years in California. We both came out here to go to Fuller Seminary. She actually followed through and graduated with a MA in Theology and then went on to Notre Dame to get a PhD in history, and I continued a teaching career that I had begun the year before in Texas. Her birthday is March 9th, an Read more:thought
Chillaxing -- scenes from my hammock 2008-04-12 19:06:23 Looking straight up! Emily Bronte joins me in the sunshine! My new hanging plant from Target. I bought it as a symbol of celebration of Kristine's life and the time we shared together as friends. The bike. Looking forward to taking it to the beach SOON. This is how I look on Saturdays. Bare freckled face. I'm listening to a lecture series by Thomas Keating called Centering Prayer. It is some of the best teaching I've ever heard. I downloaded it from iTunes, but you can also get it from Amazon. Read more:scenes
Eeyore learns from tigger 2008-04-21 16:29:55 Been watching the iTunesU lecture by Randy Pausch with my students. We've been writing out our childhood dreams and such. My students are seniors, and they have places to go and people to see. I encourage them in whatever ways I can. I jotted down some of my favorite lines while watching. I'm an Eeyore and he's a Tigger, so I have a lot to learn. I don't know if I got them down verbatim, but here's what I heard: Wait long enough and people will surprise and impress you. Just keep waiting. It will come out. Luck is where preparation meets opportunity. Have something to bring to the table. You'll be more welcome. Brick walls are there to let you know how badly you want it. Get the fundamentals out of the way because without them, the fancy stuff won't work. Experience is what you get when yo
Lemon bars and a massage 2008-04-22 22:43:33 Patty, a totally blind woman, hangs out at the same coffee house that I frequent. She is a kick in the pants. She gets around well. Talks to everyone. Friendly with a capital F. I like Patty. She lives at a home for people with special needs that is located up the street. Each day she makes her way here by herself to get a lemon bar. Every. Day. And, this is what I love most about her. That she treats herself this way. She looks forward to her walk, and the lemon bar is her reward. The workers here treat her like a queen. They help her count her money. They place each pastry container into her purse for her. (She also buys a lemon bar for her roommate.) They help her navigate around the chairs and tables and get her back to the door. Sometimes (a lot of the time), Patty stays and hangs out Read more:Lemon
Too close to home 2008-04-28 20:21:18 Late Saturday afternoon, I sat outside the coffee shop cleaning out my purse and making my list of all I needed to get done during the weekend. I look up from my busy-ness, and I see this. Here's a better perspective. The fire is burning just to the right of that umbrella in the photo below. See those chairs. They didn't stay empty for long. About 3:30, people start taking notice, like WTF, Chantry Flats is on FIRE! People armed with camera phones whip them out and start snapping shots. I am one of those people. And then we watch it burn. Together. And we talk to each other. And we call those who don't know about it yet. And we speculate. "How bad is it, you think?" "It's real bad. Real. Real. bad." "Yeah. Geez. It's spreading fast." "Where are the helico
Screaming into the wind 2008-04-30 13:07:23 William Young, Wayne Jacobsen, and Brad Cummings (The three men responsible for The Shack) "The Shack is a metaphor," explained William (Paul) Young at last night's "From the Soil" Arts Fest held at Fuller Theological Seminary. Young wrote The Shack for his six kids, "not for publication." It wasn't until Wayne Jacobson, coauthor of So You Don't Want to Go to Church Anymore, read Young's manuscript and suggested he publish it as a book and sell it as a movie, that the possibility of engaging a wider audience for his fictional story was born. Young's initial response to Jacobsen was, "I'm not trying to do anything here." He elaborated further that he just wanted to give his children the bigger picture not just the puzzle pieces one gets at church. &qu
The things SHE carries 2008-05-08 17:54:30 Diane Sawyer once dumped the contents of her purse onto a table on GMA. Then some woman analyzed what those contents said about the kind of gal Diane is. I can't recall the details of that analysis, but last Saturday, while cleaning out what's come to be known as "my big ass bag," I pondered what the contents of my purse reveal about me. Yes. I carry a COACH bag. A HUGE one. I got it last year for Mother's Day. I'm not a mother, so it was a gift to honor my desire even though that dream has yet to be fulfilled. It's a beautifully functional bag with lots of great inside pockets, and from the outside, one would never know how much I carry with me. Make Mental note: SHE carries a lot of crap around. Might this be symbolic of some deeper issue? I dumped the contents on the table out Read more:things
"It's okay . . . 2008-05-14 01:28:34 . . . to not be ashamed of where you come from of choices you've made of mistakes you've made . . . We are not alone," said Felicia Sullivan, author of The Sky Isn't Visible from Here. I heard Felicia read at Vroman's Bookstore last Saturday. She signed my copy of her memoir. I told her LO LA said hi. We chatted about baked goods and blogging. She's lovely. Read her book. Her story will stun
3 poems and a lively discussion 2008-05-15 14:05:32 My students and I held an awesome Socratic Seminar in class this week. We read and annotated 3 poems that depict painful experiences of African, Chicano, and Japanese Americans. Then we discussed the issues of human rights, racism, prejudice, injustice and oppression in this country. It got heated at times, and facilitating it became somewhat challenging, but it was so worth it. Our discussion led
The Human Condition 2008-05-18 22:09:44 "The spiritual journey," says Thomas Keating, "is a journey of self-discovery, since the encounter with God is also an encounter with one's deepest self. As we come closer to God, we encounter the wellsprings of our own makeup, the hidden chambers of our personality and behavior." This little book by Thomas Keating is only 45 pages long, but it is packed, I mean PACKED with wis Read more:Condition
And the answer is . . . 2008-05-21 01:41:19 Is this the "elephant in the middle of the room" that everyone is ignoring, and this kid, well, this kid SEES it and is able to acknowledge how the damn thing always gets in the way? I can't believe he/she got a zero when it's obvious this kid is intuitive and perceptive and really gets it! (And this is why I teach English and not math. In English, interpretation is everything. In math, Read more:answer
Typical Sunday morning 2008-05-23 00:16:39 "Rise and shine, girls! We'll be late for church," grandma's voice screeches down the hallway and into the middle bedroom where my sister and I sleep. I whimper and pull the quilt over my head. Minutes later. "Sun's in the Sky. Grass knee high. Get up, Shelia. Get up, Lelia!" Craig bolts into the room and jumps on the bed singing. "Hurry up, Shelia! Mister Ed is coming on! Read more:Sunday
Nakedness 2008-05-24 09:00:00 (a piece from a series about "first times" in my life) I close the curtains while she sets up the table. I don’t want anyone to see. I have never done this before. Sweat rolls down my face. She says she needs to go to the restroom. As she walks away from me, I notice the knots in her hair -- cords, matted and hanging haphazardly down her back. She is thin and bra-less. Her armpit hair
Separation anxiety 2008-05-26 09:00:00 (from the archives -- I sent Margaret a card recently, and it was returned to me, stamped "no longer at this address," and even though she retired in 1996, I felt the all too familiar panic as I fingered the card and began to weep with the grief of missing her.) Separation
Anxiety The ripples of color in the painting on the wall soothe me somehow. I look at it week after week while I wai Read more:anxiety
On my way here . . . 2008-05-30 01:14:05 I'm on my way here. Going to read this and this and practice this. Be back soon.
Bon appetit 2008-06-04 11:40:23 So, I actually didn't read these. When I entered the monastery in Santa Barbara, I saw this: See all those books! Right there in the foyer! And these: And these: And these: And these: There were books EVERYWHERE! And, I didn't even take pictures in the two libraries! So, my friend, K. and I did this: And when we got antsy, we moved to another seat and grabbed a different book: It was like a book b
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