Owner: Jokes and Forwards URL:http://freemanforwards.blogspot.com/ Join Date: Wed, 14 Nov 2007 13:32:05 -0600 Rating:0 Site Description: Funny humor listings such as jokes and funny pictures and videos. Find the newest and most entertaining jokes that you can send right away to amuse your friends by email. Site statistics:Click here
Alchoroscope 2007-12-01 01:34:00 BASED ON YOUR SUNSIGNS YOUR EXPECTED BEHAVIOUR AFTER YOU GET DRUNK !! ARIES : Drinking style Impulsive Aries people like to party and sometime sdon't know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes them prone to closing-time shot contests. They're sloppy, fun drunks, and they get mighty flirty after a couple tipples. Getting Aries people drunk I sa good way to get what you want out of them, should other methods fail. Aries can become bellicose when blotto, but they will assume that whatever happened should be forgiven (if not forgotten) by sunrise. They can be counted on to do the same for you -- so long as you haven't gone and done anything really horrible to them last night, you sneaky Gemini. TAURUS Drinking style Taurus prefers to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming for a mellow glow rather than a full-on zonk. Since a truly intoxicated Taurus is a one-person stampede, the kind of bull-in-a-china-shop inebriate who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart jokes
Air Museum 2007-12-01 01:30:00 I recently took my 5 kids to the Naval Air Museum
in Pensacola Florida (a great museum and free admission). They have one room that is full of real cockpits for the kids to sit in.I lifted my 4 yr old daughter into one cockpit that had side by side seating for the pilot and co-pilot. When my daughter got in she said "Good - this one's two player!"
Lighter side of Poems 2007-12-01 01:30:00 Roses are red, violets are blueMonkeys like you should be kept in the zoo.Don't feel so angry, you will find me there tooNot in a cage but laughing at you.*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*Twinkle twinkle little starYou should know what you areAnd once you know what you areMental hospital is not so far.*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*The rain makes all things beautiful.The grass and flowers too.If rain makes all things beautifulWhy doesn't it rain on you?*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*I wrote your name on sand it got washed.I wrote your name in air, it was blown away.then ~ I wrote your name on my heart And I got a heart attack straight away*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*God saw me hungry, HE created pizza.HE saw me thirsty, HE created PepsiHE saw me in dark, HE created lightHE saw me without problems, HE created YOU.*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Read more:Poems
A Feat of Strength 2007-12-01 01:28:00 The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen.After several minutes, the older worker had had enough. "Why don't you put your money where your mouth is?" he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won't be able to wheel back.""You're on, old man," the young guy replied.The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then he turned to the young man and said, "Alright. Get in."
World's Easiest Quiz 2007-11-30 09:28:00 Solve the below WORLD'S EASiEST QUiZ.Passing requires 5 correct awnsers.1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?2) Which country makes Panama hats?3) From which animal do we get catgut?4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?7) What was King George VI's first name?8) What colour is a purple finch?9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?Check your answers............:::: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: Read more:World
This is one of the coolest mails on software industry 2007-11-30 09:22:00 The local bar was so sure that its bartender was thestrongest man around that they offered a Rs 10,000bet. The bartender would squeeze alemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and handthe lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze onemore drop of juice out would win the money. Manypeople like weight-lifters, wrestlers, bodybuilders, etc had tried over time, but nobody coulddo it.One day this scrawny little man came in, wearingthick glasses and a safari suit, and said in a tiny,squeaky voice, "I'd like to try the bet." After thelaughter had died down, the bartender said OK,grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed thewrinkled remains of the rind to the little man.But the crowd's laughter turned to total silenceas the man clenched his fist around the lemon and5-6 drops fell into the glass. As thecrowd cheered, the bartender paid the Rs 10,000, andasked the little man, "What do you do for a living?Are you a weight-lifter, or what?""No," replied the man."I work as a project Read more:industry
Ten Commandments 2007-11-30 07:23:00 A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments
with her five and six year olds.After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
Yet another Blonde Joke 2007-11-30 07:33:00 A blond named Barbara appeared on Who Wants to be a Millionaire....Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far, $500,000 and one lifeline left--phone a friend. The next question will give you the first ever million dollars if you get it right.... but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000...are you ready?"Barbara: "Sure I'll have a go."Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build its own nest? Is it...A-Robin, B-Sparrow, C-Cuckoo or D-ThrushRemember, Barbara, it's worth 1 million dollars."Barbara: "Oh, gees, that's simple.... it’s a cuckoo."Regis: "You're sure? You can stick on $500,000 or play on for the million."Barbara: "I want to play; I'll go with C-Cuckoo."Regis: "Is that your final answer?"Barbara: "It is"Regis: "Are you confident?"Barbara: "Absolutely"Regis: "Barbara, you had $500,000 and you said C-Cuckoo. Well....you're right! You have just won 1 MILLION DOLLARS!!!! Here is your check. You have been a great contestant and a real gambler. Audience Read more:Blonde
Interesting answer...Stock market buffs - Dont miss this :) 2007-11-27 06:11:00 A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York . My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden ( ? ) , $250k annual income is not enough.I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)2) Which age group should I target?3) Read more:answer
, Stock
, Dont miss
Talking Parrot 2007-12-08 03:17:00 A man got a parrot which could already talk. It had belonged to a sailor and had a big vocabulary. However, the man soon discovered that the parrot mostly know bad words. At first he thought it was funny, but then it became tiresome, and finally, when the man had important guests, the bird's bad words embarrassed him very much. As soon as the guests left, the man angrily shouted at the parrot,"That language must stop!". But the bird answered him with curses. He shook the bird and shouted again, "Don't use those ugly words!" Again the bird cursed him. Now the man was really angry. He grabbed the parrot and threw him into the refrigerator. But it had no effect. From inside the refrigerator,the parrot was still swearing. He opened the door and took him out, and again the bird spoke in dirty words and curses. This time, the man opened the door of the freezer , threw the bird into it, and closed the door. This time there was silence. After two minutes, the man opened the door and removed Read more:Talking
, Parrot
A Day off 2007-12-08 03:12:00 Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off."The man replies, "And how would you do that?"The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling.The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?"The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb."The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
House Boats in Kerala , India 2007-12-07 05:00:00 The House
boat are giant country crafts, measuring up to 80 feet in length, retrieved from being lost to the State altogether. Once they ruled the backwaters, poled along by one or two men, heavily loaded with rice, coconut and other commodities. But in the recent times, the kettuvalloms have been replaced by more and modern modes of transport, relegating them to neglect and decay.It takes great skill and meticulousness to construct these giant House boats by tying huge planks of jack wood together. Curiously enough, not a single nail is used in their making of a houseboat. There used to be an entire clan of artisans who were involved in kettuvallam construction. Click to enlarge images Read more:Boats
, Kerala
, India
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