Owner: Nintendo is Right, Nascar is Wrong URL:http://www.sportsthatareright.blogspot.com/ Join Date: Tue, 16 Oct 2007 17:00:29 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: A blog about nothing. A humorous look at everything that is right and wrong with girls, sports, and everything in between. Site statistics:Click here
More Brokers 2007-11-05 07:55:00 T-Mac's BrokerCraiger's Broker Read more:Brokers
Don's old 2007-11-27 10:58:00 Video I made last week, for my buddy's birthday and to try out the video production capabilities on my new computer.
There is a God 2007-12-01 23:46:00 1. Missouri will NOT be going to the National Championship game. That's all I have to say about that.2. The KU Basketball Jayhawks defeated Arizona in OT to remain undefeated. We have the equally if not more evil USC tomorrow. Let's roll. 3. Speaking of OT, last week the Bears beat one of the evilest teams of all time, the Broncos. Now we have to crush that pip-squeak Eli. He just looks like he needs a good ass kicking. I hate that guy. And his brother. That's right, I said it. His commercials suck too. I might have to see what Dark Tag can do with it.* 4. I beat Grid Irony. Many of you won't know what that means, but the few that do understand. *In case you missed any parody vids, check out my YouTube page in the Links section on the right.
Riding That Train 2007-11-28 22:41:00 And I'm not talking about the El. There's something about traveling on a train. I don't know what it is, but I like it. Though I don't believe I've written anything astounding while riding a train, I always feel it's a possibility. Like writing and train rides go together for some reason.I like the fact that they never got rid of the conductor hat. Sure, it's silly. It's something your dad wore when you played with your model train set, but dammit, it's tradition. I also feel it has to be cold outside to make it real. When you walk from the gate to the train, you have to feel that cold air. It's more romantic that way. Other things I like:1. Every seat has power outlets. Awesome.2. You can sneak drinks on board. Or other things, if you so desire.3. You don't have to wait for the train to reach it's desired altitude before you turn on your electronic devices.4. It's usually not full, so you can stretch across the two seats. I've always wanted to ride a tra Read more:Riding
, Train
Not Arm Out. Arm in. 2007-12-06 17:40:00 That’s how my friend Armin told me to say his name when I first met him in Baltimore. I spent one year in Baltimore, and it was a strange, yet essential time for me: The first year out of college. Living at the parent’s house. Moving somewhere with no friends, no school, and no job, but a lot of ideas.I interned at a great theatre, but was working for peanuts. Made just enough to shoot pool and go to the bar on dollar bottles night. Through somebody I worked with, I met a group of about ten kids that had nothing to do with theatre, and loved to go out. Half of them lived in a big Convent, where the best parties were, and by the end of my year in B-more, I had my own room there. I hope my picture is still on the door.I planned on leaving after a year (to get my shit together, is what I kept telling myself) and I’m glad I stuck to it. More than a year at the Rent’s house would not be good for anybody.It’s always weird to re-trace your steps, and think how things happened the wa
My 2 cents 2007-12-04 13:15:00 On Kickass's last post. 1. I beat Grid Irony also. Too bad my team is absolutely terrible and pretty much squandered a playoff spot.2. No Mizzou. Good times. But, I also have nothing more to say here.3. The Kansas basketball Jayhawks have just beaten 2 solid teams, and with our two best players injured. Just sayin. 4. Um, no question on the evil factor between Arizona and USC. USC could beat Notre Dame for the next 100 years (and may well, it seems) and that still won't be anywhere close to the 1997 KU-Arizona game, which was unquestionably the most painful and evil game in the history of sports. That game was far worse then the Lin Elliot game and the Bartman game combined. Lute Olsen and his great hair can go to hell. That said, USC certainly gained some evil points by signing Lil' Romeo. 5. I watched the end of the Monday Night game. I don't like the Ravens, and I have roto interests on New England so I don't despise them this year. But I have to say, since not a
Dry Heat vs Dry Heat 2007-12-18 15:08:00 I'm waiting at my gate for a flight to Arizona. The flight's delayed, of course. Mine always are. The one good thing is the flight is not full. In fact, there are no B's at all. No middle seats necessary. I take a look at the gate next to us. They are overbooked. It's the Friday night to Vegas. In their waiting area, there are guys in suits, girls in dresses, everybody ready to go out. Laughing. Excited. All of them attractive, young, and every ethnicity is represented.I take another look at my side. Lots of old white guys either asleep or reading the paper, all wearing a holiday sweater. The Vegas side is dressed to go out as soon as they land. They'll probably get the party started in the air. ipods and Sunglasses. No one's going to bed any time soon. In their immediate future, I see cubes of ice with the last remains of their first drink. My immediate future? Working, on my own stuff, which is good, but not nearly as fun or exciting. I'm watching the peo
Economy Plus (or my announcement) 2007-12-17 13:16:00 United Airlines, my hero of the skies (not sarcastic, I love United) created a new class of service a couple years ago. They call it "Economy-Plus" Basically, it's a coach seat in the emergency exit row with twice the legroom of a regular coach seat. Most airlines have extra legroom in the exit row due to logistics, but United further extended that legroom and created a sort of half-coach, half-business row. For a couple hundred dollars extra (or a couple $10 extra, depending on the route) United fliers get a lot more room to stretch out, and can take advantage of the business/first check-in line at the airport. But, no entry to the business/first class lounge at the airport, no free booze on the flight, and the same food that coach eats (assuming food is served) are the drawbacks that make this a half-way endeavor. From a business perspective, I can understand United's reasoning here. I could also understand why a passenger may wish to indulge in this product. Yet,
Diver down 2007-12-24 23:02:00 I like Scuba diving. I haven't been in over a decade though. I've thought of going while here in the Philippines, since the diving is world-class and all, but I don't have my certification card here, which presents a problem. I did go snorkeling, and it was cool, and it reminded me of how much fun diving can be. It struck me, why haven't I been diving in so long?Well, let me introduce you to the second group in my series on douchebaggery - divers. They're awful. I'd forgotten how annoying they are. At the beach I am at right now, divers are the primary clientèle. Diver
s, like hikers (another group that can annoy me) get up needlessly early in the morning and then finish what they are doing at like 2 p.m. Why? Why go diving at 8 a.m. when you will finish with 4 hours of daylight left? Why not start at noon for sleeping purposes? This is vacation, right? Well, at 2 p.m. when the divers are done for the day, they drink. To the point of drunken embarrassment (and consi
Last night a DJ ruined my life 2007-12-22 04:32:00 Okay, so I've been in the Philippines for 4 days, and I have lots to write about it. For starters, here in Boracay, there's more tang on sale than I've ever seen in my life. Surprisingly, I don't mean whores, I mean the ghetto astronaut drink. It's everywhere. There are convenience store signboards just announcing: TANG! While I haven't partaken yet, there's only so long one can go without indulging in the homeless man's Kool-Aid. Anyway, I want to start a running series on, for lack of better term, douchebaggery. I must ask, is there a field more full of douchebags (not counting suburban police and mall security) than DJs? Is there a less educated/less talented person that could have more effect on your life in certain situations? I mean, these are high-school dropouts with czar-like power over a given club. Granted, I am not talking about high end DJs that are good at what they do, and often work at the top clubs in LA, Vegas, Chicago, New York, London, Paris, Berli Read more:ruined
Cowboys and Bullets 2008-03-11 11:16:49 Ahhh, Vegas. Where else can you drink while standing on a moving walkway - and fit in?It was a good trip. And, sticking to the high-fidelity that this blog is, here are the top five moments of the trip.1. Aces over Kings. While the girls were seeing Love, I was playing in a cash game at the Mirage, one of the most famous poker rooms in Vegas. There were a few pros floating around the tables, luckily no one famous sitting next to me. I had been card dead the first hour, literally getting 7-2 (the worst starting hand in poker) 4 times. It was only fair that I would pick up pocket rockets in my big blind, after the small blind raises it to 12. I re-raise to 25, he calls. The flop comes 5-8-J rainbow. He checks to me. I bet 35. He moves all in for 110 more, and I call instantly. He flips over Read more:Cowboys
, Bullets
The poker, the scraper, the gouger 2008-03-05 11:20:30 After a solid imperial decade-long break, I have returned to the dentist. Actually, I went to the dentist three months ago or so, because my teeth were rotting out and the pain finally became too much to stand. I basically had three states of being - asleep, plastered, or in agonizing pain. Since I’m a teacher, not a pyramid scam participant or a camaraman or a fireworks salesman or a delivery driver (or any other of my many illustrious occupations), a perpetual state of drunkenness at work simply wouldn’t do, thus the agonizing pain portion lasted far too long, upwards of six hours a day. So I went to the dentist, and he discovered two massive cavities (my first!) on the right side of my mouth. One (by far the more painful of the two) was in a wisdom tooth, which was pretty much
Perfection 2008-03-01 10:54:40 Perfection. It can be extraordinarily elusive. One can try for it, in some aspect of life, and fail, sometimes miserably, in even the most mundane of tasks. I, for example, have never had a perfect commute, a perfect haircut (although that would really be the barber’s achievement rather than mine), or a perfect score on a Spanish vocabulary test that I didn’t cheat on. In fact, up until this point, I had achieved perfection, by my count, only twice in my life. Once, in 1993, before I was even street legal, I performed a perfect parking job. Not parallel parking, despite my record as one of the world’s finest parallel parkers, even I have never achieved this feat. And once, in the year 2000, I delivered the perfect situational pick-up line (let’s go back to your place to drin Read more:Perfection
What's in your toilet? 2008-02-21 17:49:22 So, we all have our vermin encounters. Especially in Chicago, you have your Mice, your cock-roaches...But this one takes the cake. A friend of mine who used live in Logan Square in Chicago had a huge problem. She had Rats crawling up her toilet. Just let that sink in for a minute. Remember, we're not talking about tiny mouse, but a big fucking rat who crawled down a shit pipe to get into your apartment. Horrifying. Somehow the rat survived the trek, and hopped out the other side. My friend saw one trying to jump out of the bowl one morning, and closed the lid, but the rat was strong enough to open it. She put a brick on top of the lid and went to work. When she got home, the brick was rattling. The landlord hadn't done anything (of course). The rat apparently didn't like being
Top Ten 2008-02-10 23:26:09 So, my friend Ross posted a top ten list about why he is about to turn 30. Here's my list about why I'm not. I'll list the original first so you have some comparison. Top Ten
Reasons I’m Almost 30 by Ross Jonak I actually bought a condo and can’t just quit my job and move across country. I have decorative pillows on my bed…you actually don’t sleep on them, decoration only! My mom who is a HUGE decorative pillow person should be so proud. The other week I had competing 7am meetings. Now I know why coffee was invented. My Thursday evenings don’t involve getting drunk off my ass and suffering through a hangover Friday at work. I have business cards that I actually pass out to generate business contacts instead of giving them out to only friends as a way to look
Jeepney (ie, the last part of the Philippines story) 2008-02-08 02:33:43 We reached Calipan. I knew that I would have to take a jeepney to Puerto Gallera from there. Jeepneys are based on vintage U.S. army Jeeps, and are essentially a jeep with a long wheelbase, somewhere between a jeep and a bus. Almost all of them are completely tricked out on the inside and the outside, as if designed by a Mexican gangster. The are airbrushed, colorful, and considered a if not the symbol of the Philippines
. Jeepneys carry as many people as they can, often with people hanging off the back, and they are not air conditioned. Jeepneys, like the van I was in, run specific routes but have no specific stops, but will let people on and off wherever there is demand to do so. We reached the Calipan jeepney transfer point, and the van driver told me it was my stop. A number of Read more:story
12 Years Later...I Return. 2008-02-07 12:43:38 Hands down, the worst trip of my life so far has been Las Vegas.How is that fucking possible? You may be asking. You might even say “Joe Kickass, you’re an asshole for saying that. Did you loose twelve grand on a single bet?” Nope. “Okay, so a hooker tied you up and took everything you had.” Not even close. In fact, I didn’t even lose a shiny nickel. I was 14 years old, still using dial-up Prodigy email, and my pen-pal Mia hadn’t written me in weeks, so I was already pissed off.Who goes to Vegas at 14? It’s just not a good idea, and it certainly wasn’t mine. “They’ll have video games you can play while we’re gambling.” Great.It was actually a combined trip of boating for 3 days and Vegas for 2 nights. Jetski’s – Fun, especially at 14. Vegas? Terrible idea. At Read more:Years
, Return
Good times 2008-01-31 13:47:27 found this on youtube
Ryan Howard Method 2008-01-28 12:09:49 So before continuing (and concluding in the next entry, I swear) my Philippines story, it's time to get to this blog's roots, with a sports and girls story. This story concerns two people - the aforementioned Ryan Howard
, and my buddy Don. Ryan Howard, for those who don't follow baseball, is a promising young Phillies slugger. He has become known for swinging for the fences, for good or for ill. Last year, Ryan Howard hit 47 home runs, second in the National League. Perhaps more notably, he also struck out 199 times, a Major League record. My buddy Don, for those of you who haven't read of him here before, well, is some dude. As his habit at the bars tends to be hitting on anything that moves, he too has a high strikeout rate, a practice that he refers to as the Ryan Howard method.
Van trip 2008-01-26 04:06:00 I woke up on Christmas Eve with absolutely no idea what time it was. My room in the finest hotel in town lacked windows, so it was pitch black. I fumbled around for my watch. My watch is a fake rolex that I bought in Hong Kong last year, and for being fake has held up surprisingly well. It doesn’t keep the best time, but I set it off my phone each day in Korea. In the Philippines, my phone didn’t work, so my watch never really had the right time, it was just within half an hour or so of being right. That’s pretty much all I needed there. According to my watch, it was 9-ish. Perfect. I went downstairs to the finest restaurant in town, and was excited to see French toast on the menu. I haven’t had French toast in a million years. It doesn’t exist in Korea. The restauran
Comically rich 2008-01-26 04:03:59 I think it's now officially my goal to finish writing about my Philippines trip before I start my next vacation. Writing here is slow going in the winter, when I can't go out to my precious convenience store table to do it. Anyway --As I walked toward the Christmas lights, I passed a small store with a table out front and some people sitting around it. “Hey, where you go?” One of them shouted at me.“Is there a bar this way?”“No man, sit, drink with us.” Sounded like a plan to me. I sat down at the table with the large Filipino dudes, who were eating chicken and drinking beer and rum. The shopkeeper, a woman, brought me a beer. Crispin spoke the most English, and seemed to be the leader of the group. I sat at the table with these guys, drinking beers and rum, telling st
Quick Film Update 2008-01-19 13:46:35 My short film, You Can't Outrun Bullets is almost completely shot. Just one more scene to go and it's in the can. I've already started editing, and it's looking good. Expect a full trailer in a few weeks. Also, you 360 owners, if you haven't played it yet, pick up Mass Effect. It's a great way to kill a weekend. Read more:Quick
, Update
I hate goodbyes 2008-01-14 02:05:25 It's weird. People come in and out of your life everyday, but sometimes you don't realize how much you would miss them until they aren't going to be around anymore. This person is partially responsible for where I ended up. When I was still in High school, I auditioned and toured Emporia State. One stop along the way was to see Zoiks, the comedy-improv troupe, and I was immediately inspired to become a member. They had talent, and I wanted in.This person was a mentor. Showing me the ropes, giving insight the teachers aren't going to spill, unlocking the secrets of the theater. Most importantly, they made the place feel more like home, while mine no longer existed. They toured with me on my first real job in Chicago. Sure, it was hell, the producer lied to us, and the show was terrib
The finest hotel in town 2008-01-12 08:38:24 Roxas was dark. No street lights, and really no lights coming from any business in particular, other than my hotel, which was, again, the finest hotel in town. I ate a pretty decent Filipino/Chinese beef dish at my hotel restaurant, which I could only assume was the finest restaurant in town. I was the only customer. Beer cost under 50 cents a bottle. There was a carport-looking space outside the restaurant window, which had become a makeshift arcade. Kids were playing the 5 or 6 video games there. The games all appeared to be from 1995 or before, and the text on the game was in Chinese. The Philippines uses regular Roman letters in their written language, so the Chinese text on the screen undoubtedly meant as little to the kids playing the games as it did to me. One of the games
Dead to me 2008-01-08 09:07:05 Before moving on with my Philippine adventures, I need to comment on the current state of college football. The Kansas Football Jayhawks end the season at number 7. Number fucking 7. Posnanski (KC Star writer) laid this out pretty well last week. THE Ohio State University loses to a crappy Illinois team at home for their first loss of the year, and the Kansas Football Jayhawks lose to a territorial, pro-slavery though (it pains me to say this) not horrible team on a neutral field for their first loss of the year the following week. After this loss, KU was number 5 and TOSU was number 3. Both teams are idle the next week, KU because one of the other 5 Big 12 North teams happened to be a top-5 team, and TOSU because the Big 11 doesn't have a championship game. Somehow, after both team
Boats and Touts 2008-01-07 05:50:14 Sorry I've been quiet, but I have quite a lot of shit to post soon, it's just a matter of sorting it out. I just got back from the Philippines last week, and the trip totally kicked ass, one of my best trips in years and an absolute lock to win this year's roadtrip bracket. Anyway, the first thing I'm writing is also the longest, so I'll post the first part now-Why did the chicken cross the road? To send a Todd toward an untimely demise on a dusty Philippine “highway.” But I’ll come back to that. I had a pretty hilarious adventure, traveling from the world class beaches and tourist haven of Boracay to the earthier, trashier diving resort of Puerta Gallera, Little Laguna beach specifically. Getting from Manila to Boracay required a $120, 35 minute flight on a rock star killer, w Read more:Boats
MySpace and Mascots 2008-01-06 23:16:57 Thanks for reading our 50th Post! First off, I just want publicly state my favorite feature on MySpace
. Whenever you read a bulletin, you might not notice it, but there are a two options at the bottom of the post. Option one, Reply to poster, Option two, Delete from friends. I love Option Two. I love the idea that someone you probably know, or know well enough to have on your friends list can write a post on MySpace that can piss you off enough that you immediately want to delete them from your friends list. And this must happen often enough that there is a need for a button on all bulletins. I wonder how many friends dropped me from Bulletins I posted. Hopefully at least a couple. I know I've used it more than a couple times. Once, to test it out when I first noticed it. Reall
Oranges 2008-01-04 11:52:18 Wow. KU won the ORANGE BOWL. Amazing. One of the best games I've ever seen. I was worried every second of the second half. But we were loose, and that was the difference. A few mistakes almost cost us, but the D came through.I wish I was in Lawrence right now to party.ROCK CHALK JAYHAWK KU! Read more:Oranges
Shit List 2007-12-31 01:47:25 Similar to the doughebaggery, I'm adding people to my shit list. Here are some new additions in no particular order. 1. Three Doors Down. Yeah, we all loved Superman, but keep that awful song about joining the army the hell away from me when I'm at the movies. I don't need to watch the full video before the previews start. I'd rather watch those god awful body spray commercials they used to show. And that's saying something. 2. Anyone one who works at The Apple Store, ESPECIALLY those smarmy pricks behind the Genius Bar. Have you ever had a conversation with any of them? First of all, it would help if you had a few drinks before you talk to these cock bags, but no, the genius bar is too smart to serve alcohol. They want to look down at you for asking them questions,
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