Owner: Notorious B.L.O.G. URL:http://so-stylo.blogspot.com Join Date: Mon, 03 Sep 2007 03:03:09 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: A humor blog taking pot shots at blogging , bloggers and other funny stuff. Site statistics:Click here
6 Crappy Mistakes Bloggers Should Have Avoided 2007-09-02 07:05:00 There are so many blogs writing about "Blogging Mistakes One Should Avoid". But here are 7 crapppy mistakes they themselves should have avoided: Crap #1 - Copy a whole list of post on "blogging mistakes one should avoid" written by others and published it as a post in his own blog.Crap#2 - Assume other bloggers are as dim-witted as them of making such moronic mistakes.Crap#3 - Tell people that by not reading his blog is a mistake. [Ops! sorry, it's not than a crap. It's a filth can be found in a john] Crap#4 - Dispense platitudious advice like you will fail, if the only reason you're blogging is to get rich. Crap#5 - Advise bloggers not to write what others have written when he himself is doing it. [by writing this post on "blogging mistakes one should avoid"]Crap#6- Instruct readers not to have badly written content in their blogs, when his is no better.Technorati Tags: blogging mistakes, bloggers, notorious blog, humor, kher cheng guan,
Read more:Crappy
Greeting Card For Burnt-out Bloggers 2007-09-01 12:30:00 Two months ago, you started blogging, Now look what's happened to you?All burnt out as if you're dying, So indeed, blogging can kill.Posting regularly isn't fun any more,When the traffic stops coming And your ranking is not like beforeYou should have stop blogging!Technorati Tags: blog burnout, humor, greeting card, notorious blog, kher cheng guan
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, Greeting Card
E-book For Newbies 2007-08-31 11:10:00 There are useless e-books about blogging and there will be more useless e-books about blogging. But Notorious B.L.O.G. For Newbies
is the ultimate useless e-book on blogging, and more. For a start any dummy can notice the cover itself is already sickeningly similar to those Dummies books; just like so many sickeningly similar blogs you find in the blogosphere. But never judge a book by its cover. This book covers a wide range of useless topics:Start an instantly recognized or recognizable blog by blog scraping or by spoofing some famous blogs.Plagiarize "The Million Dollar Wiki" idea and come up with the most wanted site for blogheads in the blogosphere.Rev up your blog with spicy keywords or phrases like masturbation, underwears, blogging in nude and other usual sleazy stuff to get your readers to hankerrr...for more.Create a reality show called "The Next Blogging Millionaire" and not appearing like the pathetic copied version of "The Apprentice". Turn your boring daily life and habit
If Only I Could... 2007-08-30 12:30:00 write a post as mundane as asking my readers to get to know other bloggers, and yet this post is able to garner as many as 40 favorable comments.come up with a post about some stale tips on how to stay focused on writing, like turning off the phone, shut the internet or your door, and it can still easily draw in more than 30 commentatorsbe like some bloggers who still spew out the same blogging tips, like write quality content, article submission, blog directories, etc and yet the readers lap them up. come up a blog featuring overheard and heard-it-before jokes, yet it can be one the leading blogs aroundhave a blog just dispensing trite tips about simple exercises, house cleaning or even waking up early in the morning, and this blog can attract almost 17,000 subscribers. Note: Yes, you can do them all....if you're an established or a popular blogger!Technorati Tags: blogging, comments, notorious blog, kher cheng guan
I've Been WARNED... 2007-08-29 13:40:00 ...by my regular readers. I keep receiving a flurry of their private messages which said:"I just want you to know that you’re aware that you’re about to cause a furore in the Blogosphere. And I hope that you can live with the "hilarious consequences". Don’t say I didn’t warn you." It all started a month ago…This blog was called MALAYSIA-LAH!. It was supposed to feature amusing or interesting anecdotes about Malaysia and its people. One fateful day while I was prowling in the blogging community, it dawned on me that most bloggers are too dead serious and then there are many others who are dead boring. So, I thought I would like to come in between serious and boring.I prefer to be dead funny. By taunting and japing at my fellow bloggers. After all we're a colorful community, don't you agree? So my loyal readers and those lurkers, I would like to take this opportunity to welcome you to my new notorious world of blogging... Yo, it's now Notorious B.LO.G. Note: Those who have
Commendable Comment 2007-08-29 13:00:00 As most of you have already knew that, one effective and easy way of getting traffic, is leaving comments on those popular blogs. If you have been reading those thousands of comments left on those few established blogs, you will notice one glaring similarity. Most of the regular comments are either fawning compliments or some bird-brained one-liner. You need not be a prolific writer. Don't waste your time coming out carefully-crafted comments with compelling opinions, thought-provoking argument or intelligent questions. You might get yourself miscontrued as "trouble-maker". Most famous bloggers don't favor incisive comments or constructive critiques. Now you know the real reason why some well-known bloggers turned off their comment. Your goal is to litter your name all over the blogosphere to boost your traffic. I've specially come out with this one-comment-fits-all sample. It is user-friendly and response-optimized too. Just copy and paste it onto your favorite blogger's comment p Read more:Comment
A Public Toilet Is Like The Blogosphere 2007-08-28 12:06:00 Last weekend, I went to pee in a public toilet. Don't wet your pants, this post has nothing to do with golden shower or some scatological stuff. As I was walking out from the washroom, I had this golden idea of what to write for my next post. My trip to the toilet was not down the toilet, so to speak. Here is my observations and analogies:A public toilet is just like the blogosphere. It is open to public just like the blogosphere. The only difference here is a public toilet is sex-separated. The people coming and leaving a public loo is liken to your blog traffic. Sometimes it is crowded and at times, it only gets a trickle of people. [pun intended]Blogging is for everyone and anyone; just like a public washroom. That's why you come across all assortment of people. They can be someone you know or most of the time they are total strangers. Like it or not, you will meet a whole gamut of people from Joe Blow to wunderkind to weasel. Doing different things. We all visit WC for different Read more:Public
, Toilet
, Blogosphere
, Public Toilet
Blogging Is Their Epitaph 2007-08-27 12:34:00 Last Friday or was it two posts ago, I wrote a piece call "The BLOG Has Left The Building". It was a satire about the prematured death of many blogs. This is the continuation of that bleak post. Here are epitaphs from some of the blogstones found in the BLOG-YARD:Technorati Tags: blogging, humor, notorious blog, kher cheng guan
Read more:Blogging
7 Blogging Lessons Learned From Bloggers 2007-08-26 12:00:00 1. Never share your so-called blogging tips, when your own blog sucks.2. Never write an empty rambling about your own writer's block and sneakily publishes it as a post.3. There are many get-rich-quick blogging scams just like the notorious online marketing.4. Content is king, only if you are blogging in your own blogdom.5. Don't waste time concerned about which famous bloggers' new theme is better, when your own theme stinks! 6. Tell your readers that you blog in your underwear to rouse them to read your trashy posts. 7. The article telling you how to create killer headlines, doesn't even have an attractive headline. It just says: "How To Write Great Headlines" or "How To Write Magnetic Headlines". Technorati Tags: blogging, humor, notorious blog, kher cheng guan
Read more:Blogging
, Lessons
, Learned
It's Nothing To Blog About 2007-08-24 12:10:00 The next time when you yourself actually have nothing to blog about, you brazenly advise other bloggers what to do when they have nothing to blog about!Firstly, you got yourself out of blogger's block and got yourself a new post. Voila! Secondly, you don't have to cudgel your already beaten-up brains. Do the obvious. Write a List. Coming out a List is the easiest option to overcome blogger's block. Many blog-worn bloggers do it all the time. So, you don't have to worry yourself sick of coming out another lenghty post. Instead, now you appear as if you are doing other bloggers a big favor; offering advice or tips on what to do when they have nothing to blog. I know your next question is: What @&%?*#! tips or advice to give when I myself is bogged down in a quagmire of blogger's block. Again do the obvious. Suggest anything that comes to mind. No need to brain-storm and worked yourself up into a frenzy or think outside the box and then get yourself throw back into the block again. Read more:Nothing
The BLOG Has Left The Building 2007-08-24 00:46:00 Right now, blogs double in number every six months, according to Technorati. As of October 2006, there were 56 million blogs on the Web. Despite their strong numbers, the average life span of a blog is merely three months and shrinking daily, according to Gartner, a research firm.This was reported in CIO Today. As you can see millions of blogs have suffered from prematured death. No blog is spared. From the newbies to the top echelon of bloggers, they are all falling by the wayside. The obvious symptoms are writer's block, blog burnout, keep writing similar posts and resorting to content copying. Ultimately, they have to put their blogs away. So, be prepared. Your blog could be the next victim. But as I have already foreseen the demise of many blogs. So, I have created a site called The Blog-yard back in 2003. It's a virtual gravesite specially to "bury" dead blogs. See the advertisement below:Technorati Tags: blogs, blog burnout, writer's-block, humor, notorious blog, kher cheng gu Read more:Building
Stuck For Ideas 2007-08-23 00:33:00 As most of you know that TRAFFIC is the driving force in blogging, particularly if you are are a Net-preneur. Even if you were to blog for fun, you still want others to have a fun time reading your junk, right? As most of you also know that merely having good content is still not good enough to drive in the much needed traffic. You got to find ways to lure traffic to your blog.As most of you have already knew that the web is choked with traffic-building ideas, but I still insist to worn you out with these worn-out ideas: Go out and mingle with other bloggers. Make some comments, participate in their forums, message boards, etc.Get your own business cards as suggeted by John Chow.Submitting articles or do guest blogging.Make sure your RSS icon is accessible.Link to other blogs.Make sure you post frequently. As most of you know that post like this [giving unwanted and unwarranted tips] keep popping up daily in every other blog, which drives us up the wall. As most of you know these blog Read more:Stuck
Obviously, being a Guest Blogger... 2007-08-22 20:25:00 Can you spot which 5 guidelines to guest blogging is/are glaringly obvious?1. When guest blogging be sure that you are blogging on someone's blog which is more popular than yours, so it is beneficial to both parties.2. Make sure you write a quality content for your host blog, and that will drive readers to read your own blog.3. Never guest blog for others unless and until you have content. 4. Have an understanding with the host blogger that he or she will credit your name together with a link on the article.5. Be prepared to sacrifice your quality content for your host blog.Note: These 5 guidelines to guestblogging are adapted from a blog. Technorati Tags: guest blogging, humor, blogger, notorious blog, kher cheng guan
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, Blogger
, Guest Blogger
The Smell of Success with The Purple Cow-Dung 2007-08-22 04:03:00 This is the second book The Purple
Cow Dung by online marketing mogul, Shrek Gollum. His first book The Dig was buried alive by his critics. Gollum is a strong advocate of his own marketing principle of being remarkably different. He launched the The Dig in a graveyard. Gollum dug his own grave, metaphorically speaking. The yet-to-be best-selling author, Gollum has returned with this book, The Purple Cow Dung. According to this marketing mogul, this book is going to "stink" the online market soon. "It will take many of his critics' breath away," as Gollum proudly claimed. As we all know the Internet is already reeking with so many filthy marketing scams. So, how can you "stink" out from the scums? Drop The Purple Cow Dung in your next online marketing ploy. This pungent, but yet-to-be-proven marketing principle is again remarkably different and powerful. It will affect all the five senses of the consumers. They will lap up The Purple Cow Dung, so to speak. The Purple Cow Dung is a man Read more:Smell
, Success
IF this is about bloggers and blogging 2007-08-20 22:56:00 If you can keep your blog updated frequently, when all about youAre having writer's block and blog burnout;If you can come out with an interesting cut & paste post,But make sure no one can spot it's a plagiarized work;If you can blog about blog that blogs about blogging;Or they glorified it as meta-blogging,Or some like to satirize it as meta-boring,And yet your boring blog is the most popular in the blogosphere;If you can write an SEO headline --and not using any keywords in it;If you can write a new post daily --and it's really something new;If you can actually draw in more traffic with your similar postsAnd without having to run some stupid contests;If you can bear to hear the truth you've writtenCommented by your readers to make you like a fool,Or watch the blog you've given your life to, being criticizedAnd ridiculed, yet they keep coming back to read your blog;If you can earn a 6-figure income by teaching others how to make moneyAnd thousands of them still cannot figure out Read more:bloggers
3 Off-beat Ways To Beat Blog Burnout 2007-08-20 02:03:00 Here are 3 powerful off-beat ways to beat Blogging Blues or better known as Blog Burnout
or Blogging Burnout :1. Read Celebrity Blogs: Or should I say ogle. Visiting these celebrity blogs, gives you a refreshing change of pace. Since there is nothing intelligent or informative for your to mull over and tax your already tired mind. It's very relaxing and rejuvenating; like taking a stroll on the breezy beach watching bikini-clad girls or in a thong-throwing strip club, where you can unwind and forget all about your blog. After a brief visit, you will be back throwing yourself passionately into blogging. [this tip is more appropriate for the guys]2. Get Away From It All: Yes I mean all. Any one you know who is a blogger; regardless of who the person is. Be he/she is your boss, your colleague your best friend, your relative, your parent, your sibling, your child or even your own spouse. For a day or two, stay out of their sight, in order to have them out of your mind. Don't let any one
Recycle Old Posts Is No Joke! 2007-08-19 11:25:00 Some time ago I suggested satirically in one of my posts, entitled "One Lazy Way To Overcome Writer's Block", is now being seriously proposed by Chris Bibey in Blogging Tips. So, if you have a difficult time coming out with a new blog post, just simply recycle your old posts! Plunge deep into your musty archive and pull out some of your old but better written posts. The older the better, so your readers won't recognize that they are your past posts. Clean them up, tweak the content a little and dressed them up with spanking new titles. Now you can repost them as brand new blog posts. So, next time when you are writing a post, make sure it is blog-friendly. I mean it can be recycled in the future. And this time it is not a joke. Note: My post "One Lazy Way To Overcome Writer's Block" was posted on August, 12, 2007; therefore it is definitely Not case of content copying!Technorati Tags: humor, blogger, notorious blog, kher cheng guan,
Read more:Recycle
Blogging about Blogging is Boring! 2007-08-19 09:13:00 The TRUTH is out. And it is getting louder each day. Blogging
about Blogging is Boring! Others are starting to vent and rant their disappointment over meta-blogging, while I have been ridiculing this issue in this blog for a month now. So, I'm not alone.Maki of Dosh Dosh has written a brilliant post about some dull meta-blogs, which are repetitive and have no added value. As usual, he has come out with some tips to pull these meta-bloggers out of the 'echo blog chamber'. Read more about his comment on the problem with meta-blogging. Coding Horror's Jeff Atwood has a strong opinion against meta-blogging. I enjoy reading it immensely when he cited meta-blogging as incredibly boring and it is like masturbating! You got to read his 13 Blog Cliches. Remember my previous post " Some Bloggers Shouldn't Be Blogging Be'cos..."? And I thought I was just joking..... ?!Technorati Tags: meta-blogging, humor, notorious blog, kher cheng guan
Save The Blog Day 2007-08-17 01:02:00 What's all the fuss?There is so much commotion in the blogging arena -many bloggers are suffering from blog burnout, some bloggers are busy profiting from their readers by running useless contests, a couple of bloggers are complaining of content copying and a blogger is having a field day taking potshots at them. Some people are giving the blog and blogging a bad name. It's time to put the blog and blogging in order. Come this September 15th, it's SAVE THE BLOG DAY. All bloggers [newbies, pro-bloggers and has-beens] are invited to come together, to put the much-needed glory and little-known fun back to your blogs and blogging. In fact, this is already our third year. For those who don't know, because you are either too busy struggling to write your next post, or too sick and tired [for overstaying, like some blogging evangelists], you are still welcome to join us.What should Bloggers Do ?Bloggers can participate on Save The Blog Day by doing these 4 things:1. Publish a post on you
Contest Is King 2007-08-16 08:34:00 CONTENT IS KING. This mantra is already a cliche. Almost every "bloguru" has exponded on this three words time and again. But these days, it seems there is new buzz word rumbling in the blogosphere. It spells almost like the word CONTENT, except for the letter "N".I think this new buzz word has replaced CONTENT. It has taken over and proven to be an effective and a very popular marketing tool for many bloggers; from "dot com mogul" to "blogging-girl" to "experimenting blogger". It said to be a great way to increase your traffic, build backlinks, get rank higher for keywords in search engines, boost your blog’s Google Page Rank and Technorati Ranking and also improve your blog’s RSS readership. These bloggers are going all-out to outdo each other by awarding "bigger and better" prizes; ranging from books to lingerie to LCD monitors. Probably as an apprentice to one of the bloggeraties, who know?After all, the content you find in most blogs these days is bordering on boredom. In fact Read more:Contest
Take This Job And Flush It! 2007-08-15 23:28:00 Here is an interesting job which I found scribbled on the wall of a public washroom. Yes, it's the gospel according to the john. But I think it's a joke.GOOD GRIEF CONTENT is looking for a SUCKER-UP BLOGGER / BLOG-LICKERCategory : blognetworkJob Description: We are looking for a blogger to write about how to make it in the blogosphere in the shortest time. This blog is targeted at newbies. The type of topics you are covering are: how to butter up pro-bloggers fom the first day of blogging learn how to write superficial flattery commets to get instant linkbackshow not to write "too honest" comments to get blacklisted how to be ever-submissive to the "big blog boys"[bbb]why you should join in and laugh at the bbb's silliest jokeswhy you should participate in their time-wasting projectswhy you should never question their predictable postsPost Frequency:You must contribute at least 6 posts a day, excluding your 4 specially-written 200-word articles to compliment usWriting Style:Anythin
A Baffled Blogger Part 1 2007-08-15 11:59:00 First they say CONTENT IS KING. Then you read later, in order to have your content being read, it needs to have a KILLER HEADLINE! Now the confusion starts... Some say you need to have an attention-grabbing headline. But others claim KEYWORDS are vital in your headline. It's the SEARCH ENGINE that is going to put your post high up on the list, then only it can be seen and clicked by the web surfers. So, it's KEYWORDS and not just some random words creatively stringed together to create an attention-grabbing headline. But there are some who argue that it's the LINKS that you get your quality referral traffic. Whatever...Whatever it is you need visitors or readers to know that your blog exists. TRAFFIC BUILDING, that's what it is called. How to bring TRAFFIC or VISITORS to your unknown blog? They advise you to BAIT or to attract new readers. Offer them some value-added freebies like contests, free on-site web tools, etc. But how to get strangers to know that you're giving away all t Read more:Blogger
Blog, Mock And Barrel of Fun! 2007-08-15 05:23:00 Before I dish out another of my usual post, I would like to highlight that what I posted here are all in the name of FUN and ENTERTAINMENT WITHOUT MALICE! Nothing personal. My blog is about humor, satire, spoof and anything "useless" which I consider funny . Sometime ago, I roamed around the blogosphere, learning about blogging and I got to know a wee bit about who's-who in the blogging scene; this idea striked me. Spoof or lampoon your own blogging community, just like those standup comedians swiping at their own peers and have a good clean fun. That's why recently, I parodied some well-known bloggers, about blogging and some blogs. Just to be different or remarkable like the Purple Cow! As you know in comedy writing, the rich or famous are always the butt of the jokes. Read Melvin Helitzer's "Comedy Writing Secrets" and he will tell you more. Only the recognised, popular or celebrated personalities are being spoofed. Who gives two hoots about me and the rest of the unknown? I'm Read more:Barrel
An Overheard Idea 2007-08-14 19:57:00 This is what I overheard in the glory hole. In between his orgasmic moan, he asked:"If I want to...ummm.. start a blog, what...aahh.. the f**k should I write?"Anyone anywhere at anytime is thinking of starting a blog. But the first question that comes out from their mouths is what to blog? And quickly followed by will I run out of ideas? To get a blog out is easy. But to maintain a consistent flow of quality posts has put many bloggers in the hole. If you read some of the old blogs, you can see they are straining and struggling to push out new posts each week. So, as an interim solution some of them invite readers to participate in some kind of one-month long project on the pretext of teaching them something new. I have a solution for you. You can put out this ready-made blog right this moment. The best thing is you can blog till you rot. No blog burnout. The source for new topics is endless; both online and offline. Basically it is a just a blogful of worn-out jokes, silly quotes and
The Ten Commandments of Blogging 2007-08-14 05:04:00 Thou shall not start another blog on blogging. The blogosphere is reeking with the same stale stuff. Simply, it means it's ample.Thou shall not link back [intralink] to your own old posts more than 3 times. Readers won't like to read the same article again, again...and again! Thou shall not plaster some huge magazine covers and accompanied by some fugging puns and called it a celebrity blog.Thou shall not have a blog with nothing, except merely linking to hordes of others' posts.Thou shall not send any more "it's-a-great-tip" compliment to some of the established bloggers. You're wasting their blog space. Comment something constructive for the benefits of everybody.Thou shall not compete each other by offering bigger prizes for some silly contests, but write better articles for silly readers like us.Thou shall not start a post with a title and immediately a 336 x 280 Google Adsense ad, then another big product image and finished off with just two sentences. Thou shall not come out Read more:Blogging
, Commandments
How To Boost Your Alexa Rank 2007-09-27 04:36:00 Here is an interesting article for fans of ALEXA RANK. It's entitled "How To Boost
Your Alexa
Rank". Read more about it here. Technorati Tags: ads, affiliate, Alexa, Links, scraper sites
Is Your Blog Like A Blotched Boob Job? 2007-09-26 23:00:00 Attention: All Poor Bloggers Looking to Make Money!Learn How to Optimize Your Pathetic Blog And... Earn Tons of Ca$h Today!Valued at $197.00 Now on Sale for a LIMITED time!JUST $45.00!Dear Bloggers,Every blogger experiences it. You set up your blog, create great content as advised by every blogging experts. Then you plastered up your blog with advertising banners & widgets and embedded all kinds of ad codes into your texts. Now your blog is like a blotched boob job! Scared with unsightly images, icons and texts. The worst part is you blog is still not earning you a massive income as promised. Now you got a blotched blog and you are still broke. You are not the only foolish blogger who is still stuck in this predicament. I have help thousands of clods like you with my revolutionary breakthrough strategies. It's called JOE-CON SECRETS. It is a super-charged blog monetization secrets on the face of the earth. Now dumb blogger like YOU can receive 6-Figure Checks every week -- doing p
The Ultimate Blogging Tips 2007-09-25 14:40:00 You want to start blogging right now if you know:1. Blogging
is only about making money. That's why this post is so popular and people called their course Six Figure Blogging! 2. You can be an over-night success merely by parodying a popular blog. The proof of the moo-lah is in the copying.3. Besides making friends all over the world, blogging can make all the money in the world too.4. You don't need to know much. There are so many kinds of experts to help you.5. “How to make money” blog is the most popular and lucrative niche.6. A blog about miscellaneous ramblings can make more than $17,000 a month 7. You don’t have to waste time on creating magnetic headlines. Any red oversized headlines will do. 8. You don't need to post regularly, yet you can have thousands of readers. Check this out.9. You can make instant money by just pasting ads all over your blog. 10. Blogging can be just a compilation of YouTube clips or content from other blogs. 11. You don't need to come out orig Read more:Ultimate
How To Make Money From New Bloggers 2007-09-24 13:07:00 I used to wonder why most comments found in popular blogs are usually gushing with compliments, as if these readers/bloggers are so dopey, they have never heard or even know that you can get ideas from a magazine! Interestingly, through blogging I discovered and learnt not only the truth is out there, but idiocy is everywhere. I ceased wondering when I read Problogger's recent poll results; most bloggers have been blogging for less than three (3) months. So I was wrong to say that they are daft. They are not only daft but new as well. So, I'm sure now you know how to lure these blogging novices and bring them down to their knees and make them crawl to your promised blog-land. Like gambling, they either blog for fun or for money. It doesn't matter. The gist of the matter is you got to attract all their attention by glorifying blog monetization. Extol the MONETIZATION loud and clear. Rave about how easy it is to make big moolah through advertising programs, affiliate programs, blog sp Read more:Money
Leave Nude Alicia Silverstone Alone! 2007-09-22 16:28:00 AliciaSilverstone
is doing the animals and the animal in us a favor. So, please her alone! More sexy actresses and female models should take off their clothes to take part in this worthy cause. Their butt naked pictures and video clips can add to their body of work as well.PETA stands for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. But now, I think it should be People who Enjoy watching Titillating Alicia. Click here to download Alicia Silverstone's Nude Video clip.Technorati Tags: nude alicia silverstone, peta.org, veggie psa, humor, notorious blog, kher cheng guan
Read more:Leave
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