Owner: Slim's Wacky Blog! URL:http://slimspeare.blogspot.com Join Date: Sat, 11 Nov 2006 12:03:58 -0600 Rating:0 Site Description: Celeb bashing, bashing stupidity, humor, cricket, politics, tech, and just about everything WACKY!
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A Lame Knock Knock Joke 2006-11-11 15:01:00 I'm not very good at making knock knock jokes. I'm really bored right now that I actually got the motivation to make one. I thought I'd put it here, because I love boring the shit out of people.Knock
Knock!Who's there?[Sand nigger accent] Suicide bomber.Suicide bomber wh...KER-BOOOOM!!!Technorati tags: Knock Knock, Joke, Lame, Humor, Humour
I Want a Laptop, ARGH! 2006-11-09 19:15:00 Politicians piss me off! Especially when they're upto something with a political gimmick. When it comes to political gimmicks, Indian politicians rank at the top. Take a look at what this politician is upto...This picture pissed me off. Another political gimmick. This time, its Sharad Pawar, the agriculture minister, using Craig Barrett, the Intel chairman.What the fuck is he doing gifting a laptops to rural people? What are they going to to with it? They don't even have stable power supply in the first place! Are they going to provide any special education for them, to use the laptops?Before you write me off as a jealous prick, let me drill a little sense into your ignorant head (I can only hope your head isn't empty). Most people in the rural area don't even have proper education, let alone three square meals a day. If Craig wanted to play Philanthropist, he would have looked to provide these basic things first. The laptops, if they had been gifted to people who would actually ma Read more:Laptop
Oops... She Did it Again! 2006-11-09 04:48:00 We don't call her a slut, whore, bitch etc. for nothing. Britney and stable marriage somehow don't go together. She files for a divorce citing "irreconcilable differences". Hmm. I'm pretty sure I read a few days ago, that she said K-Fed had been "really supportive" on her way from a fat cow to her old self. The real reason probably is that K-Fed denied to touch her when she was a fat bitch, and now she wants to go one up on him.Too bad they had kids. I actually feel bad for Junior I and II. Not because their parents are getting divorced. Because their genes are made up of a dumb bitch and a half baked, idiot rapper. I wonder who Britney's next temporary husband would be. Any guesses? Would he last 55 hours or would Britney be attempting a new "shortest marriage" record? It all remains to be seen. Fun times ahead for shit talkers like me :D.Britney Spears and K-Fed wondering if their baby can float in the ocean.The couple, oblivious to the fact that Junior has floated away.Technorat Read more:Again
Just for Saddam 2006-11-06 19:25:00 So, Saddam
has been sentenced to death. I'd like to take this opportunity to dedicate a song for him, and the people in Iraq who are angry over the sentence. It's a song by the band Dope. It goes, "DIE MOTHERFUCKER DIE!"Burn in hell, Saddam. I will meet you there in about 60 years.Technorati tags: Saddam, Iraq, Saddam Hussein, Dope. Humor
Announcement 2006-11-06 19:23:00
I've made a few changes in the layout. Go have a look around if you feel like :D. One obvious change is the removal of ads (I have Violent Acres phobia now. I don't want to get bashed for running ads and providing shit content :-S).Go have a look around for other major and minor changes. I would have implemented all these changes way back, if not for my college work. I'm hard pressed for time (and so the irregular posting), but from now on, I'm going to delay the college work and concentrate more on the blog (inspiration from Cap). Give me feedback on the changes, and report bugs, if you see any. More changes coming soon.
Oh, and whoever can list ALL the changes gets a cookie ;)
Read more:Announcement
Celebrity Halloween 2006-11-03 19:09:00 The great day came and went. Did you ever wonder how the celebrities would have celebrated Halloween
? No? I didn't either. I couldn't care less. But then again, I haven't bashed celebrities for some time now. None of them have been upto anything silly. So I thought this would come as a good opportunity to make fun of them for no reason. I could make fun of them all, but then this post would go on for eternity. Here's what I imagined my top 5 hated celebrities would have been upto this Halloween.Paris Hilton:Need I say more? That costume is sure to knock the daylights (or nightlights) of Count Dracula. Imagine all the innocent people in Paris' neighborhood who had to give out candies to her.Nicole Richie:She doesn't need a costume to scare the shit out of her neighbors. Wearing no make up is enough. Look at what Lizze captured in her camera. The third one is totally hilarious, and justifies my point that this dangerously underweight, nepotistic socialite doesn't need make up to g Read more:Celebrity
Halloween Scare 2006-11-01 19:05:00 Yesterday, something weird happened. I went to bed a little late - around 2 AM. Just when I was about to turn off the lights and do my pillow (pfffss, as if YOU don't do your pillow), I heard a strange noise. The noise that you hear when a heavy piece of furniture is dragged. It was faint though. At first, I thought a burglar had broken into our house, and had accidently stumbled on our furniture. Then I heard it again. Unless the burglar was a complete idiot, like Violent Acres, he wouldn't stumble on the furniture again. So it had to be something else...I got out of my room and searched the house. Nothing. I didn't hear the sound the whole time I was searching. So, I go back to my room. And there it was again. I was beginning to think it was some kind of monster... out to take a bite out of humans, one its first victims being me. There went the sound again, but with a different tone to it this time. I gathered enough courage to open my window and peep out. I laughed my ass off whe Read more:Halloween
, Scare
Uhh... - Part II 2006-11-01 18:46:00 Thanks to Caps' research, I came to know about Sweetney, Amalah, Violent Acres and all the emotional crap involved with them. After doing some more research on "mommy blogs" (Yes, I did it without Caps' or anyone else's help), I saw most of these mommies post pictures of their little ones. You know, the so called "cute" pictures... the "cuteness" you'll understand only if you're a mommy yourself. Another thing I noticed is, these mommies usually have a domain of their own, and run ads to make a few quick bucks. Hey, I'm not the jealous type. I don't mind anyone spinning money off of their blog. But in this case, the content happens to be their precious, little blue (or black or brown) eyed angels. Which translates to the mommies being responsible for the content, as they are using their kids to entertain the internet "masses". And masses translate to different kinds of people - stupid ones, morons (like me), intelligent ones, pedophiles and, physically and emotionally abused orp
Uhh... 2006-10-31 18:17:00 I was browsing Technorati a bit, and found a lot of posts about "Amalah", "Sweetney" and "Violent Acres". I could figure out there was a relation between these "things" or "stuff" or whatever they are. I'm feeling real lazy today (the way I feel almost every other day), so I'm not really interested in doing a bit of research. Can anyone please explain what the hell it is about? I will give you a cookie if you do ;)Technorati tags: What, the, hell, are, Sweetney, Amalah, and, Violent Acres?
Kindergarten Sex Education 2006-11-11 16:53:00 If you thought Diddy's vaginal dryness problem was the funniest thing you've heard in a while, then check out this story.In a country dominated by stupid politicians and moronic people, that was certainly missing. Well, not anymore. Now we're going to have five year old kids talking about marijuana and bangin' dem hoes. A perfect addition to an already fucked up country. And I thought kindergarten is where you learn the alphabets and numbers...I'm jealous of the little bastards now. I didn't get to see pictures of boobies and pussy when I was five. Heck, forget five, even when I was 13 - 14. I asked my dad about sex. I asked, "Pop, where do babies come from?" and he slapped me slightly, "Aye! Why do you wanna know?" and I go, "'Cause I'm 18!". We won't be having that kind of a conversation in Indian households anymore. Perhaps the kids can teach their parents stuff they didn't know! That would be a first. Kids teaching parents about sex. Hey, atleast we're one up on the rest Read more:Education
, Kindergarten
Ass, You Like It 2006-11-12 19:18:00 Oh. And if you're wondering too much about the title, its a Shakespeare knock off.Technorati tags: Bin Laden, Osama Bin Laden, Terrorism, Shit, Humor, Humour, Funny, Pic, ROFL, LMAO
A Mighty (Pain in the Ass) Heart 2006-11-21 16:36:00 Jolie and Pitt are in the country, but guess who is grabbing all the attention? Their bodyguards. First, it was a British photographer who was at the receiving end. Now, its muslim students of a school in South Mumbai and their parents. Click here to read all about it. It's proof bodyguards are all brawns and no brains. Talking shit about people in their territory, bad idea. I mean, it's like going to Afghanistan and calling the Taliban "towelheads!". Ain't no way you're coming back without just one leg, one and a half hands and half a head.Perhaps the attention-whore nature of their bodyguards led Brangelina decide to torture anoth... I mean adopt an Indian kid. Celebrities always want to be in the news, don't they? So, they decide its time to add another foreign kid into their inter-racial adoption kit bag. When are these self righteous celebrities going to realize inter-racial adoptions are a sensitive thing (Psst Madonna, this goes double for you)? Why are celebrities attentio Read more:Heart
, Mighty
My New Ambition 2006-11-23 17:12:00 I've always wanted to be a computer programmer, and maybe a stand up comedian like Kramer. But after reading this news, I want to be become an airport security guard. I will KILL to fulfil this ambition. Hey, where else besides being a porno movie director do you get to see a lot of live boobies? That's what I thought until I read the last paragraph. Bummer.I would definitely like to be on the other end of this "body scanner" though. It's not like I wouldn't lie to the security chick about the hot guy with long ding dongs, and it's not like she would figure out I'm bullshitting and miss it in the name of work ethics. But problem would arise when I want to travel abroad. I wouldn't want anyone to notice my gun, however small it may be. I know, I'm a terrorist in a sense. I'll have to travel by boat, I guess. Hopefully not in the Titanic. This is one time I wished technology didn't grow at the pace that it is growing. Actually, I wish my ding dong was bigger, so I could walk ac Read more:Ambition
Self Image 2006-11-24 18:54:00 Me in 10 years. Ahahahah, I can't help but pity myself.Technorati tags: I, am, Desperate, Humor, Humour, Funny, Pic, ROFL Read more:Image
Funny Video 2006-11-26 18:20:00 Why do dumbass people do what they shouldn't be doing? Is it because they're dumb? We should hurl all the dumbass people up, and put them on an island, like this dumb guy...This guy lets his gun fly out of his hands and hit him right in the melon.Technorati tags: Video, Humor, Funny
, Humour, Dumbass, Redneck, ROFL, LMAO Read more:Funny Video
Home Alone 2006-11-27 18:44:00 It's every persons dream. Being home alone. And I am, for 3 days! Even though I have some extra shit to do around the house, and it's probably going to take my time from blogging, I'm excited. Mainly because I can walk naked around the house, sleep naked, watch TV naked, blog naked. In short, I can be naked the whole day! No one can explain the feeling of pride you get when you just walk around the house naked all day. Jennifer Aniston once did it in Friends. I envy the nudists, especially those who get to see naked chicks. I think I'll mov.... wait a minute.... what's that? Uh oh, someone's at the door...Technorati tags: Home Alone
, Fun, Personal, Life, Fantasy, Naked, Nude, Naturists, nudists
Commies Shood Laern Engalish 2006-11-28 19:00:00 Need I say more?P.S: I know the new comment box is a little buggy. I will fix it tomorrow.Technorati tags: Commies, China, Communists, Humor, Funny, Humour, Pic
Finally, Some Sanity Prevails 2006-12-01 16:51:00 I'm actually surprised that some sanity prevailed in the prosecution of Shibu Soren, the politician. Its probably the first time in Indian politics that power wasn't misused in hindering the legal process. For the first time, I did not look at the front page of the newspaper and go "WTF????"Good stuff. But one thing I can't believe. Okay, actually two. One, this idiot was still kept in power though he had a major murder case against him. How the hell did the Prime Minister trust this bugger and put him in the council of ministers, I guess its like one of those universal questions that will never be answered. And along with this story, was this piece of story. So it was kind of a double delight for me, seeing that some sanity is prevailing in the country's legal process, and powers are not being misused.Oh, and the second thing that I could not believe... what's that you ask? Take a good look at this pic, and tell me how one cannot say that this moron is a freaking psycho??? He loo Read more:Finally
, Sanity
"Annoying" Can Be Fun 2006-12-03 17:58:00 Some time last week, I had blogged about the annoying website I came across. Today, I accidently stumbled across a spoof of that on YouTube. So I got a little curious, and searched for more... and guess what? I found some good spoof (or is it spoofs?) of BadgerBadgerBadger. I guess annoying things can be fun after all!Badger spoof(s?) have become a kind of cult club with more and more users responding to the annoying animation. Here are some of my favorites. Hopefully, you have a lot of time at hand and are bored to death, so you can watch all of these videos.Check out this neat little animation. Must have taken him/her a while to make this. And what more, its so "famous" that it has become a post-dinner family activity, with fathers asking their sons to act it out! These guys obviously had a lot of time at hand to act out this hilarious spoof. I don't know why this one is called a GeoBadger, but it sure close to the sillyness of the original version. "Hmm, how much more silly could i Read more:Annoying
Weird Dreams 2006-12-06 18:33:00 Lately, I've been having pretty weird and supernatural dreams. It all started with the weird ass alien-in-the-rooftop dream I had a few months ago (read it here). You would notice my writing is pretty much different from what it is now... that was a few months ago. Astonishing how ones writing style can change soon. Okay, back to the point. I've had some more of supernatural dreams, some having aliens in them. It's pretty weird... I'm starting to think these actually have some kind of message in them. Like some supernatural power is trying to communicate with me (psssh, don't laugh!).The recent two dreams I had have been the weirdest yet. And scariest. I'll start with yesterday's dream. I was with some chick in the beach. It was after midnight, and there was no moonlight. So obviously, it was dark. And for some reason, I was seeing myself in third person. We were running from something, I don't know what something was, but we were running from it. And thats how we ended up in t Read more:Dreams
, Weird
Topless Car Wash 2006-12-07 19:10:00 I would love to stumble across one, if I could. But being the pervert that I am, I think I'd take a raincheck on that one... keep reading to find out why.Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Video, Car Wash, Humour, ROFL, LMAO
Sexy Blue Screen 2006-12-08 19:08:00 The Blue Screen, Microsoft's version of Satan, the leading cause of suicide in geekdom, was much dreaded by computer nerds like me. But this blue screen, I'd love to stare at for hours .Woo! Okay, I've got plenty of fun stuff on the Blue Screen I can write about. But I don't have the time right now. I'll do it tomorrow. Watch out for the fun post, and make sure you're bored to death, because there's going to be plenty of easter eggs and fun stuff to do. Now, I'm going to stare at that picture for some time.Technorati tags: Blue Screen, Microsoft, Windows, Humor, Funny, Pic, Picture, Sexy, Humour
Blue Screen Stuff 2006-12-09 18:58:00 Okay, so its that time of the night when you are bored to death and have nothing to do. Until Super Slim (look! Up in the air... its a bird! It's a plane! No, its just a moron with a stupid blog post.) comes along and rescues you from the evil clutches of boredom. Today, Super Slim has for you a few Blue Screen
of Death goodies. If you aren't yet enlightened about the Blue Screen, read my previous post. If you're still confused, go away. This post is not for you. Go drool over the picture in my last post.The notorious Blue Screen has been the subject of many easter eggs (not related to the easter bunny). Lots of video games have easter eggs based on the Blue Screen. Startopia for example, and the famous SWAT 4.Check out this totally hilarious Intel commercial! In fact, the Blue Screen of Death has been an inspiritation to coining new similar corny terms, like the Red Screen of Death, White Screen of Impatience, Spinning Beachball of Death, Spinning Pizza of Death etc.The Blue Screen
Indian Men Unhappy 2006-12-10 19:11:00 Back in school, I used to learn in Civics classes (thats political science classes for you Americans) about the diversity in our country. Now, this article takes that "diversity" to a whole new level. "Indian men are unhappy", says the article. Well, this article made me happy, in the sense that I know I'm not alone in contending with the agony of "the sizes"."Mr Puri said that since Indians would be embarrassed about going to a chemist to ask for smaller condoms there should be vending machines dispensing different sizes all around the country", the article says half way through. Yeah right. But what about the guy standing behind me in the queue (line/row for you Americans) watching over my shoulder?"It's not size, it's what you do with it that matters. From our population, the evidence is Indians are doing pretty well," the article quotes Sunil Mehta, the editor of Maxim, as saying. Indeed. Maybe we did it a bit too well; our population is all set to overtake China by 2050. And no
How to Insult a Geek 2006-12-11 19:19:00 The art of insulting is quite an err.... art. Not everyone can master it. Nor can it be taught. It takes quite a creativity to actually offend someone. Like, you insult a terrorist by calling him a camel driver, or a sand nigger. Call a Mexican gangster puto, and you'll have him point his gun (the actual weapon, AhEm...) in your face. Call an emo a emo, and you'll have them crying immediately. Actually, you can call them anything. They'll cry anyway. But, how do you insult a nerd/geek (like me), who are super intelligent and don't fall for the stereotype "faggot", "bitch" and "asshole"? This cute chick in the picture tells you how...Ahahah! I just got pwned!Technorati tags: Humor, Funny, Pic, Insult
, Humour, Geek
, Terrorist, Emo, Art of Insulting
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