Owner: Postcards from the Mothership URL:http://danigirl.ca/blog/ Join Date: Fri, 17 Aug 2007 12:48:30 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: Now new and improved!
Canadian working mom of two preschool boys. Sometimes thoughtful, often witty, always verbose. Site statistics:Click here
Taking a stand on Sesame Street 2007-11-21 07:54:46 I’ve written before about my love for the original, unadulterated SesameStreet
of my childhood, and how Simon and I have spent hours enjoying the old clips - first on YouTube and then on our Sesame Street
Old School DVD collection. I’ve even added the latest collection (Old School: 1974 to 1979) to my Christmas wish list. Not Simon’s wish list, mind you. Mine.
What I didn’t notice was that apparently somewhere on the DVD collections there is a disclaimer that states: “These early ‘Sesame Street’ episodes are intended for grown-ups, and may not suit the needs of today’s preschool child.”
Seriously?
I mean, you only have to watch some of those old episodes to see how they are fundamentally different - and, IMHO, far richer - than what’s available on PBS today. But not suitable for a preschool child? What, because of the psychedelic colours, the folky music, the blissful naivety, the 1970s peace-and-love groove? Granted, it’s a litt Read more:Taking
Talk to me about online shopping 2007-11-20 07:24:43 I’m starting to get worried. It’s just a little over a month until Christmas, and I don’t have any big ideas for the perfect gift for everyone.
(This is something I do to myself every year. Simply giving a gift is not enough, it must be the PERFECT gift. It must allude to the recipient’s personality, how much I value them, be unique, be useful, be fun… preferably all of the above, but at least most of them.)
Usually, by this time of year, I have at least a couple of ideas percolating in my head. This year? Nothing. And I’m starting to panic. Add to that panic the fact that we’re really trying to cut back costs this year, and the fact that I simply don’t have the stamina for hours of mall-walking in search of the perfect gift.
The answer? Online shopping, of course. Given the strong Canadian dollar, there has never been a better year to shop online
. I’d still prefer to shop Canadian sites (shipping and duty can be a beast,
Two for the price of one 2007-11-19 07:44:49 We didn’t plan to space Tristan and Simon 22 months apart. In fact, we didn’t really plan for Simon at all - not that it wasn’t a blissful surprise. But when I think back to those early days, with a newborn and a not-quite-two-year-old in the house, I shake my head and wonder how we all survived with our sanity intact.
Now, of course, I’m glad they are so close in age. They are best buddies (when they aren’t mortal enemies) and most of the time, we simply treat them as if they were the same age. They have the same bedtime (in beds in the same room), the same routines, the same expectations and the same standards of behaviour. While this probably makes for a bit of a challenge sometimes for Simon, if you were to ask him I’m sure he’d tell you there is nothing his brother can do that he can’t do too, if not better.
It’s easy to forget, sometimes, that he’s two years younger. They play the same games, enjoy the same activit Read more:price
Canadian Children’s Book Week 2007-11-18 17:52:32 Did you know it’s CanadianChildren
’s Book Week?
I was looking for information about kids books for something meme-ish, and came across this list of 100 Best Canadian Books for Children, courtesy of the Toronto Public Library, but I have to admit that I’ve only read about ten or so of the books. Some of our favourites made the list, including Paulette Bourgeouis’ Franklin stories, Dennis Lee’s Alligator Pie, and Mordechai Richler’s Jacob Two-two Meets the Hooded Fang. (I read this when I was a kid, but haven’t thought of reading it to the boys yet. Hmmm. Note to self: would make a good Christmas gift!) And of course, we are Robert Munsch fans around here, particularly Mortimer, The Mud Puddle, I Have to Go, and Thomas’ Snowsuit — anything but Love You Forever, perhaps the most morbid and disturbing kids’ book ever written.
But in one hundred books, they didn’t find room for some of our very favourites. The boys
Not for lack of trying 2007-11-17 15:45:51 I’m trying to write a post, I swear I am. Not a great post, not the most cerebral or entertaining post ever, but I had an idea, and I had some pictures, and I was going to turn them into a post. So I dumped the photos from the camera to the laptop, and have been trying for the best part of an hour to force them onto the interwebs, but the interwebs have other ideas.
First, My Computer kept seizing as I tried to upload them to Flickr from My Computer. Fine. Go in through Flickr and try to upload them that way. Internet Explorer seizes. Fine, open Firefox and upload them through Flickr. Firefox seizes. Fine.
Move to desktop computer. Rogers’ parental controls ask me to sign in to the Internet using my Yahoo ID. Fine. Go to sign in to Flickr, and realize I have to change to my Flickr Yahoo ID, and not the Rogers Yahoo ID. When I sign out of the Rogers Yahoo ID, my internet access is denied.
FINE.
Decide to just upload the photos directly to my web space for hosti
When they say ’self-cleaning’ oven, they don’t really mean it 2007-11-26 07:01:56 We have a self-cleaning oven. For a while, I thought maybe this meant that fairies came in the night and cleaned the oven for us, but after an extended period of hopeful waiting, this does not appear to be the case. In fact, it involves setting the oven to some dangerously high temperature and scorching the holy hell out of the dirt, then scooping up the ashes. Which is actually a rather appealing solution to housecleaning, don’t you think? Screw the clutter, we’ll just carbonize the shit out of everything and then flush it down the toilet.
You also need to know - as if that won’t become self-evident by the end of this post - that I am not the most diligent housekeeper in the world. We don’t exactly live in squalor, but my threshold for a little mess is probably higher than most people’s.
So anyway, you’d think a self-cleaning oven would improve this situation, even if no fairies come to do the dirty work for you — and especially consideri
Random bullets of belly 2007-11-25 15:49:06
I was never entirely sure, during my first two pregnancies, whether I was carrying like a watermelon or like a basketball. I always suspected I was vaguely more watermelonish. This time, the belly
is definitely higher and more out in front - aha, basketball.
In light of the above, I have now reached a point in this pregnancy where there is more belly suspended out in space than cradled in the not-insignificant cavity created by my pelvic bones.
The Player to be Named Later seems to have an especially strong relationship with gravity.
He also never. stops. moving. In fact, I love this, as it’s like having my own little party going on all day long. There is nothing better than sitting in a boring meeting at work feeling him thumping happily and stretching this way and that. It’s like having a private conversation that favours nobody but me.
I have been telling myself that this constant activity in utero is a sign of a placid, mellow baby. Please do not disabuse me of t Read more:Random
A new waterpark for Ottawa 2007-11-24 11:47:06 How cool is this? It may be minus 15C and snowy outside, but by 2009 there will be a new 100-acre water park (that’s six times the size of Mont Cascades) just a five-minute drive from here! And this is in addition to the as-yet unnamed new amusement park and water park they’re opening in Smiths Falls in 2010.
I love water parks. We make the trek out to Mont Cascades at least once a summer, and I love the idea of one being so close. And in 2009, Tristan and Simon will be just the right age to start enjoying the bigger waterslides.
The weather outside may be frightful, but suddenly I’m dreaming of streaming cold water and hot summer days!
Read more:Ottawa
Seven random things about… Simon 2007-11-23 07:53:53 About a million years ago, Laura from Lunatic Fringe tagged me for the “Seven
Random Facts About Me” meme. I’ve done a bunch of these over the years, and it’s getting tough to come up with more fresh stuff that you don’t already know about me, which is part of the reason I’ve sat on this for so long.
Then, inspiration struck. You might not need to know seven more random things
about me — but what about seven random things about Simon
, the cutest preschooler on the planet?
1. He’s adorable. No, really, he is. He’s one of those sweet-natured, flirty, adorable three-going-on-four-year-olds who just seem to have a natural ability to charm people. And he uses it shamelessly to his advantage.
2. He’s going through a kissing phase right now. I’m laughing to myself just thinking of his puckered puss as he offers it to me to be kissed many, many times a day.
3. He’s adventurous in his food choices. He’ll
Why I’m thinking of quitting Facebook 2007-11-22 07:46:51 A not-so-hypothetical situation: It’s the Christmas season, and you’re doing a little bit of online shopping. You click over to Amazon, or eBay, or another one of 40 or so sites, and make your purchase. And the next thing you know, all of your “friends” on Facebook
get an update in their Facebook News Feeds: “DaniGirl just bought Season Six of Smallville on DVD from Amazon.com.” What, you didn’t see the little pop-up window warning you that your purchase was about to be added to your Facebook account? Oh well, hopefully the “friend” you were buying the gift for doesn’t read his news feed that day.
As if that weren’t creepy and disturbing and Orwellian enough for you, how about the fact that you are automatically signed up for this “feature” and to opt out you have to do so on a case-by-case basis.
Here’s how the CBC describes “Beacon”, the latest new “service” on Facebook Read more:thinking
Good news and bad news online 2007-12-03 10:29:12 The good news is, Facebook has changed it’s mind about that stupid “beacon” thing that I ranted about last week, where they broadcast your online
purchases in your Facebook news feed. You now have to opt IN to the service, which is totally the way it should be, instead of making users go to the trouble of opting out. Bravo Facebook, I guess I won’t be quitting just yet…
The bad news is, Blogger sucks! Did you notice that as of late last week, you can no longer leave your non-blogger.com URL in any comment you leave on blogspot blogs? If you don’t have a Blogger account, you can only leave your “nickname” with no link back to your blog. How lame is that? I find all sorts of great new blogs by surfing the blogs of people who comment on other blogs. I looked for documentation about this all through Blogger’s site and couldn’t find any reference to why they would do this.
There are workarounds, of course. You can open a
Birthday Wii-kend 2007-12-03 07:41:11 I can’t tell you what a relief it was to be done NaBloPoMo on Friday (yay! I made it!) and not have to worry about throwing together a blog post on the weekend, not because we lacked bloggable fun but because we were so darn busy I hardly had time to sit down let alone blog about it.
This week is Beloved’s birthday, and I found out way back in the summer that there was a really cool social media conference going on in Toronto that I wanted to attend - on his birthday. “Happy Birthday
, baby, I’m leaving you alone with the two kids while I jet off to a hotel for a day or so. Have a great one!” Because of that, and because he’s just such a great guy and wonderful husband and friend, and because he almost never gets really and truly spoiled, I wanted to get him something special for his birthday.
Way back in the summer, I knew I wanted to get him a Wii
console. I like the idea of the Wii, like that they market themselves as a kid-friendly company, a
The case of the missing mittens 2007-11-30 07:36:06 I was ahead of the game this year. No really, it’s true!
When the first mittens started appearing in stores this year, unceremoniously elbowing the beach towels and sand toys off store shelves (probably back in July or something ridiculous like that) I started buying them and ferreting them away.
Before I even knew what colour the boys’ coats would be, I was buying mittens. Fleecey mittens, woolen mittens, waterproof thinsulated mittens. Whenever I was out and came across a stash of mittens, I bought a pair. Or two.
Just before the first snowfall, I even cleaned out the top of the front hall closet and sorted out all the mittens left over from last year. I had the boys try them on, washed them, and tucked them back into the basket so we’d have an accessible and reliable place to go for back-up mittens.
And last night, as we stood in the front hallway with our boots and our skipants and our coats and our hats on, ready to go out for a little after-dinner fun sho
A bit of a rant on baby gear 2007-11-29 07:21:24 So, Dani, now that there are less than 10 weeks until your due date, what have you done to prepare for baby’s arrival?
*sound of crickets*
Well, that’s not entirely true. Couple weekends ago, I drove out to the Monfort Hospital, so at least I know where the hospital is for when I go into labour. That’s a good start, right? Didn’t actually go inside or anything, but if I can make it to the parking lot, I figure we’re off to a good start.
And it’s not like this is my first. We have boxes on boxes of baby supplies, and one of these days I’ll sort through them and wash all those adorable little sleepers and sockies and blankets. And the crib is still assembled from last year (see, laziness has its benefits) and I know exactly where the baby bucket car seat is in the basement. A place to sleep, a way to get him home from the hospital, and he won’t be starkers in the cold February drafts - what else does a baby need? Cuz I’m thinki
Oedipus Redux 2007-11-28 06:55:21 We’re sitting in Harvey’s, waiting for the boys to finish their fries so we can head over to Toys R Us (an exciting family night on the town!) Tristan, sitting beside me on the bench, is playing with an onion ring, which prompts a discussion about rings on fingers and my rings in particular.
“There’s one from Granny,” I say, showing him a white gold band with a ruby set into its face, a ring given to my mother before my parents were married by a rich aunt of my father. “And these two are from Daddy. See, it looks like one ring, but really there are two together on the same finger. So two rings, plus one ring is how many rings?” I ask, since Tristan is beginning to work on his math skills this year.
“Is that your wedding ring?” Tristan asks, ignoring the math question and already knowing the answer because they’ve long been fascinated by my rings.
When I say yes, it is, I can see the wheels turning in Tristan’s head. Read more:Redux
Where I’m coming from 2007-11-27 07:05:50 An interesting meme on identity, pilfered from daysgoby. I’m not convinced I’ve done it justice.
I am from paperback books, from Lays BBQ chips in a turquoise bowl, and from orange shag rugs.
I am from primary-coloured paint chipping from cold metal playground bars, from a blue two-wheeler with a white banana seat and high-rise handle bars, from dog-eared lined notebooks and fat red pencils.
I am from the bruised green sky of a pending thunderstorm, from snow that works its way under even the most tightly wrapped scarf, from sleeveless shirts on starry summer nights.
I am from the raspberries and the lilacs, from red rosebushes crawling up the trellis and emerald green lawns carefully tended. From yellow brick houses with gingerbread trim, and wide straight streets with towering trees.
I am from presents on Christmas Eve, from crepes made from scratch, from Kiefers and McLeods and even deBeers - yes, those deBeers, but too far removed to inherit any diamonds.
I am fro
The one where she buys the minivan 2007-12-10 08:17:22 I like shopping for cars. I like thinking about the features, the colour, the style, the shape. I like comparison shopping, and I don’t mind haggling a little bit over price. I bought my first car back in December of 1990. It was a 1990 Mazda 323 hatchback, and I drove the snot out of that little car. In 1998, Beloved and I leased a Cayenne Red two-door Sunfire with a sunroof, and that was my sexy car. Completely impractical for kids, but a fun car to drive. That lease expired in June of 2001, and we signed the lease for our first Ford Focus station wagon that month. In fact, we signed on the dotted line during a fit of optimism during the two-week wait of our in vitro fertilization, and I remember thinking at the time that I would be some bloody pissed if the treatment didn’t work out and I ended up childless and driving a station wagon around town. Lucky for us, it turned out to be the perfect family car for our brand-new family. Simon was about four months old
Five pounds and counting 2007-12-09 07:52:52 I had an ultrasound on Friday morning, and the baby is looking chubby, healthy and altogether lovely.
It was the first chance this pregnancy that Beloved has had to come to an ultrasound with me. (You think we’re getting a little bit jaded about this whole pregnancy thing? I would have been scandalized had he missed one of Tristan’s ultrasounds!)
The Player to be Named Later - we really do have to get on with that naming thing - is looking, according to the locquacious ultraound technician, “lovely” and “gorgeous” and “perfect” and even “helpful” in turning just the right way so she could get her measurements.
Since she was in there poking around anyway, I asked her if she could confirm the gender for me. It’s not like I didn’t see it myself the last time, but I just couldn’t quite shake off those “girly” type thoughts. Sure enough, magnified on the screen that couldn’t be more obvious,
Highs and lows in customer service 2007-12-07 06:31:07 I may have mentioned (*grins gleefully*) that I got Beloved a Wii for his birthday this year. I started thinking about looking for one way back in August, and even then was having trouble locating one. When I finally found one online at theSource.ca at the end of September, I jumped on the opportunity, ordered it online and had it delivered to my parents’ house.
At the beginning of November, I happened to be flipping through a Source/Circuit City flyer, and saw that they had (as had most retailers) dropped the price of the Wii console by $20. Great, I thought, and went to the store in the Rideau Centre to ask how I could get the $20 credited to my account. First, they said they couldn’t do it at all. Then they said the Wii I ordered was of a different caliber (??) and the price on those units had not dropped. Then a second person said regardless, you bought it online you have to talk to the online people.
Okay, fair enough. I bought it online, I will continue to deal
I have the bestest bloggy friends 2007-12-06 07:37:44 This was going to be a rather drawn out recap of my little jaunt to Toronto over the past couple of days, but I have exactly no time to write it up as it deserves. Okay, so the majority of it wasn’t incredibly exciting, except I got to meet some really cool people doing really interesting things with social media, and you’re probably lucky to be spared the excruciating details.
But I have to tell you about this. I was supposed to meet up with a bunch of my bestest bloggy friends, most of whom I haven’t seen since last year’s Motherlode conference presentation — but because it was a Tuesday night, and because they’re all busy mommies, many of them couldn’t make it.
In the end, it was Marla and Lee and I who got together for a lazy, chatty and very yummy dinner at Fran’s Diner. (I had pix, but forgot to take them off the camera. Sigh.) I’m so so happy to have had the chance to meet up with Marla and Lee, who may just be two of
In defense of Donder 2007-12-05 06:25:47 “Oh no,” lament the bloggy peeps who have been around for a while. “Not the reindeer thing again!”
Why yes, as a matter of fact. It’s the reindeer thing again. If I can educate one misinformed soul every year about the correct names of Santa’s reindeer, my mission will be a success. (Besides, I’m in Toronto at a conference as you read this and hard up for fresh material and bloggable time. So, please accept this repeat post dredged up from last year with my gracious apologies.) Now, where were we? Oh yes, the reindeer thing…
“You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen;Comet and Cupid and DONDER and Blitzen…”
As you might know, my last name is Donders. As such, it has been my lifelong quest to set the record straight and right the wrongs entrenched by Johnny Marks and Gene Autry.
Here’s a little history lesson for you. The poem “A Visit From St Nicholas”, commonly known as “The Night Before Christmas”, was wr
Bring on the Christmas music! 2007-12-04 05:59:57 Remember me saying that I had that big ol’ iPod full of empty space, just waiting for the right music to come along and fill it up? That was before I remembered that the holidays are upon us. And you’d better believe that a bona fide Christmas
junkie like me has, erm, a few Christmas CDs laying around…
By the time I finished adding these to my iPod, it was well over half full!
My top ten favourite Christmas songs from this well-padded collection:
Little Drummer Boy/Peace on Earth - David Bowie and Bing Crosby
Baby, It’s Cold Outside - Dina Shore
Do They Know It’s Christmas? - Band Aid (what can I say, I’m a child of the 80s at heart)
Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) - U2
Santa Baby - Eartha Kitt (This is also Simon’s favourite - he likes the “ba-doum, ba-doum”s)
O Holy Night - Luciano Pavarotti
I’ve Got My Love to Keep Me Warm - Dean Martin - although the Ella and Louis version is also excellent
I Believe in Father Chris
The twin mythologies of Christmas 2007-12-20 07:37:25 The boys have been talking about him a lot this season. You know, the larger-than-life figure who was probably once a real flesh and blood person, but whose mythology has blossomed into something so wide-reaching and so integral to our culture that you simply can’t avoid him. He’s so central to this particular season that he regularly makes an appearance in conversations at the family dinner table, and I feel like I have to bite back my own cynicism to support the boys’ unquestioning faith for at least a couple more years.
Oh no, not that guy. Not Santa. I’m talking about Jesus.
It’s just been in the last month or so, juggling the various seasonal mythologies, that I realized I feel more or less the same way about supporting my children’s belief in Santa as I do about supporting their belief in Jesus. The similarities are striking: I believe both are lovely concepts at the core and I have no issue with how other people choose to venerate the c Read more:Christmas
Random bullets of minivan-ness 2007-12-19 07:20:21
It’s been just over a week since we picked up the minivan. Meh. I don’t hate it, but I can’t say I’m in love with it. It has wheels, a steering wheel, and it goes. I suppose that’s a good start.
The first time we tried to pick it up, we made it all the way to the dealership with the boys in tow before they realized they had forgotten to order the licence plates for us, so I had to trek back the next day after work to pick it up.
The good news is, the dealership is a four-minute walk from a major transit station. (And, for the record, it’s the only time I’ve had to stand on a bus for this whole pregnancy. People who live in Barrhaven apparently have better manners than the people who live in South Keys. I’m just sayin’.)
The bad news is, it was yet another snowsqually day in Ottawa (have there actually been ANY days without snow so far this year?) and it took me more than an hour to make the 15 minute drive from the dealers Read more:Random
Contemplating February 1st 2007-12-18 07:48:30 I had to laugh. Remember when I talked about my obsession with Survivor and how it’s been deeply intertwined with my reproductive years? I wrote about how Simon was born on the morning of the first episode of the first Survivor All-Stars season in 2004, and what a valiant effort I made to stay up late enough to watch it - from my hospital room - after being up since 6 am the morning before.
So this week on the latest Survivor grand finale, Jeff Probst announced that the next Survivor series will be yet another all-star season, this one “fans versus favourites“, and it’s scheduled to start February
7 - a week past my official due date of Febuary 1st. Anyone want to lay a bet that I’ll be welcoming the new baby into the world by watching the first episode from my hospital bed - again?
***
The other thing about my due date of February 1 is that it’s Simon’s birthday. How inconvenient!
I’m thinking about boosting his birthday party up by
Naming the Player to be Named Later 2007-12-17 06:30:56 We’ve got a little more than six and a half weeks to figure out exactly what this baby boy is called, and quite frankly, I’m stumped.
It pains me, because I have a list of girls’ names as long as my arm, but I’m simply running out of good choices for boys. Not to say that we don’t have at least a few contenders: I like Lucas, and Henry, and Myles, and Jack. I think my first choice might have been Jasper, but both Beloved and my mother laughed out loud when I suggested it. I love the name Justin, but it sounds way too much like Tristan. Papa Lou is lobbying hard for Max. I’m fond of Benjamin, but that happens to be the name of the mean-as-a-snake cat we had who died last summer. I’ve taken a recent liking to Charlie as well, and Quinn has a quiet strength that fits in nicely with Tristan and Simon.
There’s no lack of tools out there on the Interwebs to help you narrow down the choices. The US Social Security Administration releases Read more:Naming
Stocking solutions? 2007-12-15 10:27:13 A quick question for the bloggy peeps: with my brother and his family visiting this Christmas, we have ten stockings to hang. In previous years, we’ve hung the stockings from the curtain rod - but, this past summer, the boys pulled it out of the wall and it’s simply not all that strong. We’ve also used those stick-and-remove hooks before, but I balked at the price tag; at $3.99 each, it will cost over $40 just to HANG the stockings, let alone fill them!
What do you use to hang your stockings?
Read more:solutions
, Stocking
Canadian Blog Awards now open for nominees! 2007-12-14 06:52:30 It’s that time of year again - nominate your favourite blogger for the Canadian
Blog Awards
!
This year, I was asked to help judge eligibility in a category or two (you know, cuz I’ve got nothing else going on right now to keep me busy) and I was pleased to lend a hand. The Canadian Blog Awards have been good to me over the years (my series on Taking Down Rick Mercer from 2005 was a lot of fun to write) and this year they are being operated by a new and diverse group of bloggers including Saskboy and Northern BC Dipper and Stephen Taylor and Jason Cherniak and a handful of others.
I know a lot of people are critical of this type of thing, saying it’s nothing more than a popularity contest, and there is always at least a bit of controversy. But I’ve found some of my favourite blogs through the CBAs over the years, including Ali from Cheaper than Therapy and the now-defunct Debaucherous and Dishevelled. It’s great exposure just to be nominated, and a love
Seven things that suck about the third trimester 2007-12-13 06:49:21 What, you thought I was going to go all this time and not whine at some point about the myriad woes of late pregnancy did you? This has been an easy pregnancy, and the second half has been generally much more pleasant than the first (nothing like getting rid of all-day nausea and abject terror to improve your demeanor) so I don’t have a lot to complain about — but I’m not going to let that stop me.
Really, it was my fault. Even though I didn’t say it out loud, just last week I was thinking about how much less stressful this 8-months-pregnant-in-December-while-working-and-mothering-full-time has been as compared to my experience when pregnant with Simon… and then my body started getting just a wee bit fed up with the 5 lbs interloper.
So, as promised, the only seven things
I really have to complain about with just over seven weeks to go:
7. Restless legs. Only when I’m tired, but it’s like 1000 ants crawling through my knee joints. Ugh.
6. Read more:third
, Seven
, trimester
Tick tick tick - send Christmas ideas, quick! 2007-12-12 06:46:57 There’s an old song by Nancy White called, “It’s Chic to be Pregnant at Christmas
.” A few of the best verses:
It’s so chic to be pregnant at Christmas
I feel like the “round yon virgin” of yore
‘Cause though I have a warm bed to sleep in
There’s no room for me when I go to the store
‘Cause the aisles are so narrow and crowded
Christmas shopping has never been such a pain
(gasp) Here comes another Braxton-Hicks contraction
And I’m knockin’ over knick-knacks again
Oh, the salesclerks are so friendly this Christmas
One said, “Oh God, lady, don’t have it here”
Their discretion and manners go right out the door
When I and my stomach appear
It’s so Biblical to be pregnant at Christmas
No matter what stories you believe
And I may suffer from gravid senilis…and heartburn and nausea and charlie horses and overwhelming fatigue…and frequent micturation and varicose veins and…swoll Read more:ideas
Recommend Site To A Friend
