The Webtools of the Trade
2007-08-14 18:29:00
So how did a hobo like me end up with enough geek power to attempt to fund my dream through the medium of the interweb? At the age of nine the old man announced that we were getting a computer. The thought of playing classics like Donkey Kong, Pacman and Pong was so exciting that I clearly remember letting a little bit of wee wee dribble out. Much to my disapointment we ended up with the educational BBC B Mico with it's mighty 32KB of RAM. It was rubbish, but the film War Games had convinced a nation of kids that by we could prevent nuclear war by learning BASIC and polishing up our naughts and crosses skills.So for a few years I geeked it up and learnt all about PRINT, WHILE, IF, THEN, ELSE, END, RETURN, DRAW, PLOT, COLOUR, MODES, ENVELOPE, DANDRUFF, ACNE, IRON and MAIDEN. Armed with all the basic skills to embark on a promising career I discovered cider, women, smoking and joined a band. Let's face it, they're a lot more fun.For over a decade I rarely even touched a computer until
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A Brief History of Mine
2007-08-13 18:00:00
Here's my attempt to condense an autobiography into a series of bullet points:Like most people I started things off with being born. I had toyed with the idea of simply appearing but came to the conclusion that this would probably cause a lot of questions and so on the ninth of July 1974 my mum pushed me out of her front bottom.To be honest the first two years of my life weren't very exciting. As a baby your choices are pretty much limited to eating, drinking, shitting and puking, I did however find these activities so enjoyable that to this day I still list them on my CV under 'Hobbies and Interests'.At two years of age a younger brother came on the scene. According to Dr. Barkan Rimm sibling rivalry is at it's worse when there is a a small age gap and one child is 'intellectually gifted' so that relationship was pretty much doomed from the start.On my first day at school (the Hermitage in Woking) I was punched for looking up Karen Letterman's skirt. I'd like to point out tha
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, History
The Website Design Tramp
2007-08-13 13:24:00
So who is the website design tramp? I'm a web designer from sunny Bournemouth. Due to an extremely dishevelled appearance, a selection of interesting tattoos and a fondness for cider more and more people have started to call me the tramp.So why the blog? Well at long last I've gone and got myself a goal in life. After spending years of travelling around the world living out of a backpack without a care in the world it's dawned on me that I'm not getting any younger and it's time to start planning for the future. This blog is all about the journey along the way to the ultimate goal.So what's the plan? To get my hands on enough cash to buy a Contessa 32 Yacht, learn how to sail it and see every country in the world before dying (hopefully of something related to either drinking, smoking or shagging... I don't mind which but I'd hate to go being hit by a bus or bludgeoned to death by a coked up chav).So how are you going to get the cash together? Well at the moment I'm about £20
Poker in Bournemouth
2007-08-15 18:12:00
I played my first game of texas hold-em about fifteen years ago in the Red Lion in Ringwood and lost about twenty quid, which kind of put me off as that would have got me ten pints of cider. A few years on Channel 4 started showing a series called Late Night Poker
at about the same time I started working nights at a taxi company in Bournemouth and the love affair began.Being a typical geek I learnt how to play by reading rather than playing starting with Doyle Brunson's Super System: A Course in Power Poker. About the same size as War and Peace you don't so much read it as attempt to absorb this huge tome cram packed with figures, maths, examples, strategy and anecdotes. Internet poker was the easiest way to get a game and I spent a while playing the free money games at Empire Poker before realising that, apart from improving my mouse handling skills, they are a complete and utter waste of time.After mulling it over and deciding that all that reading was surely good enough preperatio
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