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Could new Mr. Right be white? 2007-08-10 09:41:00 BY DIONNE WALKER RICHMOND, Va. -- For years, Toinetta Jones played the dating game by her mom's strict rule. "Mom always told me, 'Don't you ever bring a white man home,' '' Jones recalled.But at 37, the Alexandria divorcee has shifted to dating "anyone who asks," regardless of race.''I don't sit around dreaming about the perfect black man I'm going to marry," Jones said.Black women nationwide also are reconsidering deep reservations about interracial relationships.They're taking cues from stars like actress Shar Jackson and tennis pro Venus Williams, as well as blogs, how-to books and novels telling them it's OK to "date out."It comes as statistics suggest black women are among the least likely to marry. "I'm not saying that white men are the answer to all our problems," Jones said. "I'm just saying that they offer a different solution." She reflects many black women frustrated by the field of marriageable black men: Black men are nearly seven times more likely to be inc Read more:Right
On race and relationships 2007-08-10 09:30:00 By Kristine ThiessenLast Saturday, News columnist Ken Herar appealed to youth in Abbotsford and Mission to share their thoughts on building inclusive and diverse communities. My own thoughts meandered to the topic of misconceptions about interracial relationships and their impact on society. With Abbotsford’s ethnic minority populations growing, the instances of interaction between different races will also grow. Fears, wariness, and misunderstandings lessen, and more interracial dating occurs. Interracial relationships are usually seen as symbolic of an increasingly inclusive community. Often, interracial relationships are deemed “trendy,” and year after year articles on how it is becoming hip to mix appear as news. When these articles do appear, the increase in mixed couples is sometimes touted as the beginning of the end of racism, or the end of race mattering, in whatever multicultural community is being discussed. And for some who enter into a mixed race relationship with a
Women of color ask: Is it all right to date whites? 2007-08-10 09:20:00 So if all races of the world are free to date or marry anyone they choose, why is it newsworthy to note that black women are now, more than ever, choosing to date men outside their race?I read an article recently about black women reassessing their options and rethinking their reservations about engaging in interracial relationships, and I was surprised. Yeah, the pickings for eligible black men are slim, even slimmer if you want one who's college-educated, slimmer still if you want one without a criminal record and darn-near impossible to find one without children!To be honest, I've only ever dated black guys because that's pretty much all who ask me out. Well, except for that one time in ninth grade when a white guy asked me out on a date - but that situation was different, because I wasn't allowed to date until I was 16. I told him exactly that, that I wasn't allowed to date so ask me again when I turned 16. But I think he moved away, because I don't remember ever getting that Read more:Women
Increased prevalence of interracial romance 2007-08-19 18:55:00 Since the Supreme Court struck down the last of America’s antimiscegenation laws, the number of interracial marriages has more than tripled. According to the Census Bureau, the number of mixed-race marriages rose from 300,000 in 1970 to 1.2 million in 1990. Between 1960 and 1990, the percentage of African American marriages involving a white spouse more than tripled. Furthermore, according to recent statistics, 65 percent of Japanese Americans marry outside of their race and 75 percent of Native Americans marry someone of a different ethnic background.The incidence of interracial dating among American youth has increased even more dramatically. According to some recent studies, as many as 57 percent of teenagers have dated someone outside of their race. An additional 30 percent have indicated that they would consider dating outside of their race. Many credit the rise in immigration and racial integration, which have increased the amount of contact that young adults have with people o
Miscegenation in American history 2007-08-19 18:50:00 Antimiscegenation laws did not keep everyone from crossing the color line. Before the Thirteenth Amendment abolished slavery, many white slave masters secretly took advantage of black women, with whom they fathered scores of children. Also, not every state had laws prohibiting interracial marriage. Some estimates indicate that as many as 70 percent of African American
s are descendants of black and white couplings. Famous African Americans such as W.E.B. Du Bois, Booker T. Washington, Malcolm X, Martin Luther King Jr., and Frederick Douglass were of black and white ancestry. Douglass eventually married a white woman, Helen Pitts, after the death of his first wife. Douglass, one of the most vocal African American activists of the Civil War era, felt that intermarriage was the key to the assimilation and acceptance of the newly freed slaves into American society. According to Douglass, “The future of the Negro therefore is . . . that he will be absorbed, assimilated, and it will only ap
Black Women White Men, White Women Black Men - interracial relations 2007-08-19 18:40:00 Lynn NormentWHAT'S BEHIND THE ESCALATING TREND?AS we head into the new millennium, marrying mitt dating across cultural lines seem to be increasing at record rates.Almost anywhere you go these days, you will encounter mixed-race couples: at the grocery store, the mall, the theater, at a company function, at: a concert, even at church. And while for years the Black
man-White
woman couple was more prevalent, today many social observers say that the pairing of Black women and White men is just as common.That certainly seems to be the case in cities such as St. Paul-Minneapolis, where interracial couples long have thrived. But the social trend also is quite evident in other large cities such as Chicago and New York, Atlanta and Detroit, where there is a noticeable and striking increase in the number of mixed-race couples, especially Black women with White mates.In movies, on television and even on Broadway, the theme of interracial love has become en vogue. Wesley Snipes has starred in a Read more:Women
, Black Men
Do's and Don'ts for Interracial Relationship 2007-08-18 20:41:00 Whether or not your interracial marriage will face additional stress and strain than other marriages depends greatly upon your families and the community where you decide to live.If your interracial marriage is having difficulties, don't assume that the problem is based because of your racial differences. Here are some coping strategies to help deal with issues that could be hurting your interracial marriage relationship. Do follow what you feel and truly believe in your hearts. Do not let what others think about your marriage worry you. Do show mutual respect for one another and for one another's cultures. If your differences are creating problems for you, brainstorm together for some solutions. Do keep your sense of humor alive. Do remain realistic about your differences and about what you have in common. Do not ignore your differences thinking that they will just go away. They won't disappear because you don't talk about them. Do work on bringing your families together. Do not d Read more:Relationship
Why More Black Women Are Dating White Men 2007-08-15 09:12:00 It looks like Black
women have found a way to resolve the problem with the shortage of Black men. Black women have begun to expand their options, within recent years, by dating outside their race.Statistics show that more Black women are dating White
men. Black female/White male marriages went from 27,000 in 1980 to 80,000 by 2000, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. The reason for this increase in more Black women dating White men may be attributed to educational attainment, says Renea D. Nichols-Nash, author of Coping With Interracial Dating
. "A study revealed that the number of Black women earning degrees increased by 55 percent since the mid '70s, but 20 percent with men," says Nichols-Nash, a journalism professor at Arizona State University. "Women
who go to college and graduate want someone with the same educational level or more. Black men just aren't there. That could be one reason why more Black women are dating White men."Nichols-Nash says that opportunity, environment and
Interracial Marriages Surge Across U.S. 2007-08-15 08:51:00 By DAVID CRARY NEW YORK (AP) - The charisma king of the 2008 presidential field. The world's best golfer. The captain of the New York Yankees. Besides superstardom, Barack Obama, Tiger Woods and Derek Jeter have another common bond: Each is the child of an interracial marriage. For most of U.S. history, in most communities, such unions were taboo. It was only 40 years ago—on June 12, 1967—that the U.S. Supreme Court knocked down a Virginia statute barring whites from marrying nonwhites. The decision also overturned similar bans in 15 other states. Since that landmark Loving v. Virginia ruling, the number of interracial marriages has soared; for example, black-white marriages increased from 65,000 in 1970 to 422,000 in 2005, according to Census Bureau figures. Factoring in all racial combinations, Stanford University sociologist Michael Rosenfeld calculates that more than 7 percent of America's 59 million married couples in 2005 were interracial, compared to less than 2 percent in Read more:Surge
, Across
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Is love colorblind? - public opinion about interracial marriage 2007-08-14 22:28:00 National Review, Steve SailerJust three decades ago, Thurgood Marshall was only months away from appoint- ment to the Supreme Court when he suffered an indignity that today seems not just outrageous but almost incomprehensible. He and his wife had found their dream house in a Virginia suburb of Washington, D.C., but could not lawfully live together in that state: he was black and she was Asian. Fortunately for the Marshalls, in January 1967 the Supreme Court struck down the anti-interracial-marriage
laws in Virginia and 18 other states. And in 1967 these laws were not mere leftover scraps from an extinct era. Two years before, at the crest of the civil-rights revolution, a Gallup poll found that 72 per cent of Southern whites and 42 per cent of Northern whites still wanted to ban interracial marriage.Let's fast-forward to the present and another black-Asian couple: retired Green Beret Lieutenant Colonel Eldrick Woods Sr. and his Thai-born wife, Kultida. They are not hounded by the pol Read more:opinion
Interracial Couple Harrassed by Neighbors 2007-08-31 07:28:00 By Mary SheltonLynette Weaver and Larry Stapleton moved to Hemet hoping to live a peaceful life with their children. Instead, what the interracial couple said they have experienced is an ongoing harassment campaign against them by several of their White neighbors.The couple took their complaints to the Riverside County Sheriff's Department's Hemet station and instead of receiving assistance, the couple said they received even more harassment from deputies and supervisors assigned to that station. Weaver and Stapleton have been living in their home in Hemet since 2004 with their children. She is White. He is Black. Together, they are the only interracial family on their street but did not have any serious problems where they lived until several neighbors moved onto the street within the past year. Problems, they said, continued, even as deputies not only told them there was nothing they could do to help them but who, they claim, harassed them."The sheriff's department doesn't want t Read more:Neighbors
Good to march to the left, but not always 2007-08-31 07:19:00 BY RICHARD ROEPERYour turn. Michael Trujillo, LtCol, USMC (Retired): "I have always
been a fan of yours, but I would like to take this opportunity to disagree with you. Understandably, you took exception to [Ted] Nugent's behavior. Now you know what the right feels when entertainers from the left spew the same kind of venom at President Bush. . . . When's the last time you wrote a column on the classless behavior from the left? Lord knows you've had ample opportunity." Sir: I understand where you're coming from. No doubt I've criticized conservatives more often than I've ripped liberals in my column -- but I HAVE written negative things about Sean Penn, Rosie O'Donnell, Hillary Clinton, Barbra Streisand and many other liberals when I thought it was warranted. Call me an idealist, but I believe a columnist can be moderate/liberal but not take the company line on every single issue. Lori Challinor: "With your take on Disney's 'High School Musical 2,' you have joined the ranks o
Straddling The Color Barrier 2007-08-30 04:21:00 Ernest AdamsImpending daddy-hood, for the first time I might add, has left me with unmitigated happiness and mitigated concerns. I was diagnosed with prostate cancer nearly 13 years ago, so the surreal dances with the real, and as the reality spins in joyous anticipation, I say to myself, with boundless ecstasy, “I am going to be a father in December!”A salient concern I have at this moment is how my interracial child will fit into two communities — black and Jewish — fraught with tension.Before I chose to be a Jew, I had to renegotiate the irrational and rational fears of whites that derived from growing up in a culture permeated by racism — a social cancer, as it were — and disavow the anti-Semitism I imbibed growing up in the black community. An unlikely event occurred: I met Meyer Goldstein, we became as close as brothers and Meyer’s father, Rabbi Baruch Goldstein, virtually adopted me and became a second father. It was the alchemy of the Goldsteins’ love and uncond Read more:Color
, Barrier
Interracial unions more accepted in Canada than U.S.: report 2007-08-29 05:47:00 Shannon Proudfoot Canadians -- particularly those under 35 -- are significantly more accepting of interracial marriage than Americans, according to a new report
.While 77 per cent of Americans approved of marriage between blacks and whites in a recent Gallup poll, a report released today by University of Lethbridge sociologist Reginald Bibby shows that 92 per cent of Canadians are in favour of such unions. A similar proportion approve of intermarriage between other ethnic groups.The approval rating climbs to almost 99 per cent among those under age 35.In the mid-1970s, 55 per cent of Canadians approved of marriage between blacks and whites, while 40 per cent of Americans thought the same way. By 1990, 78 per cent of Canadians accepted interracial marriage -- roughly the same proportion as Americans today -- while just 48 per cent of Americans were willing to give their blessing."We see ourselves as not just multicultural but really multi-everything," says Bibby. "Even if people don't n Read more:Canada
Online dating: For more than just the desperate 2007-09-21 09:23:00 Running out of options of people to drink with, date, or do on the weekends? Online dating websites might have the solution to your weekend woes.According to MSNBC.com, over 40 million Americans, or 40 percent of the single population in America use online dating services. And college students are quickly catching onto the trend.From subscription sites such as Match.com to free sites such as Interracialfriends.com, online dating is emerging as the newest way to meet singles and expand your social network.Frustrated by the lack of variety at Macalester, Alison Johnson* '10, joined Interracialfriends.com as a joke with her friend. "I am using an online dating service because, as much as I love Mac guys, they are either overly-confident and self-centered or they're so introverted that basically don't exist," said Johnson. "In addition, we have the three G's to contend with: gay, gross, or girlfriend."Despite enjoying the academic challenges of Macalester, Johnson has been disappointed
The taboo of interracial relationships-yes, dating! 2007-09-21 09:05:00 Anastasia A. MeltonEarlier this week, I had the pleasure of watching one of my favorite shows, Tyra. I love everything about Tyra Banks. I think she is a great role model for young girls and women. She is not afraid to speak up for things she strongly believes in. She is not afraid to get controversial. She is trying to make a difference and open our eyes to the world around us. Well, I was inspired to talk about a topic that many people are afraid to address.That topic is interracial relationships. Insert horror film music here. You're probably asking yourself, "Did she really just go there?" You better believe it. I did just go there. I personally see nothing wrong with it, considering my own personal multi-faceted racial background.There are many sides to this topic. It is not just one-race feels one-way and the other race feels another. Instead, some people from each race feel opposed to it, while other people from each race have no problem with it.The question I want to ask is wh
Same-sex marriage: 'A cruel imposter' 2007-09-19 05:24:00 Same-sex marriage
has become central in Iowa news recently. A judge overturned Iowa state law recognizing marriage as between only a man and woman. Since then, some have spoke in defense of that decision. The supporters of same-sex marriage often press their agenda by applying labels and assumptions upon those who oppose same-sex marriage.We are either anti-gay, homophobic, irrational oppressors of human rights or enemies of equality. Indeed, some who oppose same-sex marriage do so out of hate. But the majority of Iowans are socially conservative. We are hard-working, patriotic, religious followers of tradition. That tradition, handed down through the Greeks, Romans, Judeo-Christianity and English was transplanted to American shores where it lives and breathes perhaps stronger than in its sources.Loving and following our tradition, embedded firmly in our culture, is neither irrational nor oppressive. As the church teaches, homosexuals must be treated with dignity. We are to love them b Read more:cruel
After 66 years, a love story that almost wasn't comes to its end 2007-09-18 07:57:00 By ANDREW MEACHAMIt was the summer of 1941. Bill Simon, 19, was staying in a cottage with his family on Conesus Lake in upstate New York. Sailboats skimmed across the lake's breathtaking surface, a mile wide and 8 miles long. The United States had not yet joined the war in Europe, and Bill's biggest problem was a girl whose parents had rented the cottage two doors down.Helen Clark was 18. She had long black hair and blue-gray eyes. Bill liked the way she looked in a bathing suit.They talked and swam in the lake. Bill was quickly smitten. He confessed his attraction to a friend named Wes, who dropped the bombshell."He said, 'Bill, forget about it. She's engaged,'" Bill said.It was true. Charlie Moran was five years Helen's senior and a graduate agriculture student. When Bill met Charlie, Charlie was taking a course in the artificial insemination of farm animals."He was getting cows pregnant," Bill said.Which meant that Charlie was gone a lot. Bill and Helen swam in the lake togeth Read more:story
, comes
Older women dating face depression, STDs 2007-09-17 09:59:00 U.S. women over age 35 who return to the dating scene after the breakup of a long-term relationship often face depression
and sexually transmitted diseases.Dr. Bronwen Lichtenstein of the University of Alabama in Tuscaloosa completed a study on the health risks of older women dating and found the women were depressed, had a lack of health information and had a lack of social support after their relationships.Lichtenstein surveyed women in Alabama, who were recently divorced or widowed, and found almost all the women reported being depressed after ending a relationship and at least half the women had been diagnosed with a sexually transmitted infection. The women also faced biological, emotional and personal issues, although the real problem is that the issues aren't being addressed, Lichtenstein said."Women are biologically more at risk for STDs at 50 than at 20 and most women don't realize it," Lichtenstein said in a statement."One of the most interesting things for me was that they
Young man demands money for dating woman 2007-09-17 09:53:00 This is a story of how a middle-aged man impregnated the daughter of a General Overseer of a prominent Pentecostal church in a city in the South-South and later turned around to blackmail her by demanding for money. According to the story, the pastor’s daughter was married but was still having an affair with this young man and she had been dating him for some time now.Small Talks, however, learnt that this lady is right now in a state of dilemma as the guy is insisting that he be paid a large sum of money or he would spill the beans of their secret affair to her husband. It was revealed that since the guy started requesting for the money, things had not been the same again in her home as she had not been able to pay the huge ransom. For this reason, as the story goes, she stands the risk of losing the husband should the guy carry out his threat to make their affair public. The lady who hails from a South-Western part of the country is said to be a young mother while her father is sai Read more:woman
, Young man
Cole: A lifetime of love for interracial couple 2007-09-16 02:29:00 I am a 63-year-old, second-generation Italian. My parents were off the boat. Thirty-three years ago, I was lonely, wondering why I couldn't find ''the right woman.'' One day, the most beautiful woman walked into my workplace. I struck up a conversation, and one thing led to another. She is African-American, but it didn't seem to matter. She is better educated than I am, but it didn't seem to matter.When we met our parents, mine were cold and distant. When we met hers, her parents informed us that they hadn't sent their daughter to college so she could become successful ''and leave her people behind.'' Her father looked at me and said nobody in his family would ever marry ''a white boy.'' I was 31 years old. We got married the next year. Both sets of parents refused to attend the wedding. Tell those young folks that it is their life, but they have to take control of it. We did. And our lives have been blessed.Today, we have four wonderful children and four wonderful gran Read more:couple
Insulting Blacks 2007-09-16 02:13:00 “I don’t feel no ways tired. I come too far from where I started from. Nobody told me that the road would be easy. I don’t believe He brought me this far,” drawled presidential aspirant Hillary Clinton, mimicking black voice to a black audience, at the First Baptist Church of Selma, Alabama.I’m wondering if Mrs. Clinton visits an Indian reservation she might cozy up to them saying, “How! Me not tired. Me come heap long way. Road mighty rough. Sky Spirit no bring me this far.”Or, seeking the Asian vote she might say, “I no wray tired. Come too far I started flum. Road berry clooked. Number one Dragon King take me far.”The occasion of Mrs. Clinton’s speech was the 42nd anniversary of Bloody Sunday, on March 7, 1965, when 600 civil rights marchers were attacked by police with billy clubs, cattle prods and tear gas, one of the high points in the black civil rights struggle.Commemorating a key point in American history is one thing, but a white person mimicking black dia Read more:Blacks
Dating violence among students 2007-09-13 09:36:00 A startling number of high school and college students - both female and male -- are being battered, sexually abused or stalked by their dates, according to a Kansas State University professor. "Approximately 30 percent of college students have been in relationships that involve physical aggression. Even more have been in relationships that are emotionally abusive," said Sandra Stith, director of the marriage and family therapy program at K-State and a nationally recognized expert in domestic violence. Likewise, approximately 25 percent of high school students who are in relationships are subjected to abuse, according to Stith. Why? Research points to many complex triggers, said Stith, who also is a pioneer in couples treatment for domestic violence. Stress and the inability to control anger are common ones. Another is the intensity of the relationship. Stith said studies show that the more serious the liaison, the more likely it is to be violent. Too many students think they don't de Read more:Dating
High school relationship blossoms at different colleges 2007-09-11 06:54:00 Tim Reid saw Ann McCullough and her friends looking at him from across the room, laughing. He thought their laughs were because they were making fun of him. Little did he know, McCullough only giggled because she was admiring him instead of paying attention in their high school freshman history class.“He used to sit across the room from me so I actually just thought he was really cute. He just always smiled and never talked,” McCullough said. Despite his notion that he was being made fun of, Reid thought McCullough was attractive and tried to get the courage to meet up with her after class. “I was nervous talking to her,” he said. McCullough’s friend since fourth grade, Alli Matheis, a junior at Indiana University, remembers Reid being quiet and staring with McCullough at him across the room. A mutual friend kept the two connected over the summer, and after a few group hangouts and parties, on McCullough’s birthday of her sophomore year of high school, Reid asked her out. Read more:different
, colleges
interracial couple in modern day america 2007-09-10 07:21:00 You think that in 2007 there wouldnt be any trouble with interracial couple
s anymores. but that is wrong. I am a white guy who likes to date girls of different races. I cant help the people i like. I have dated asian, latina, kurdish and now talking to this other girl who is mixed with some different things. It really pisses me off when my parents get on me and make fun of me because of it. always saying when am i gonna bring home a white girl and other things. They think its funny but it really isnt funny when my parents keep doing it over and over. recently i told them i was talking to this who was mixed and it was nice. I got pissed off cause they keep joking and i dont like it. But when i get mad at them, they turn it on me and get mad at me for getting mad at them and it's all bullshit. i wish that i could say hey i am dating this girl and my mom not say " so is she white" or "what race is this one" i wish she could say.. oh that awesome, what her name and whats she from. Just th
Wedding stories annoy some 2007-09-10 07:11:00 Adam and Caitlin Nations are working their way through college. They were attracted to each other in part because of their interest in being missionaries. The bride, 21, and groom, 20, even have wonderful role models when it comes to marriage: Both sets of parents married at a young age and have stayed together.If only all wedding stories could be so idyllic.The reality is that the weekly "I do, I do" feature by M.C. Finotti sometimes raises hackles. That's true, in part, because her stories provide an unvarnished reflection of how local people meet, love, marry and have children - and not necessarily in that order.One recent story was about a groom who had been twice married and twice divorced. For his third marriage he used index cards to describe in terms of "Hot, Hotter, Very Hot and Super Hot" his love for his bride. One reader found it all deeply disturbing."So distasteful that I wanted to shower after reading such solemn stuff," Sam Pringle wrote, urging that the weekly wedding
Unforbidden Love 2007-09-10 06:43:00 My family are very cultural people and what cultural people tend to do is stay in their own accustom little world and are afraid to step out of their little box. It's hard, to know that you can never change a person and their beliefs, especially if it's your own family. At my house back home, all we do is speak the our native language, eat our cultural food, respect our elders, and forced to do "woman-hating" chores (household chores ^-^) This recent senior year I had a very open mind and wanted to be the best I can be, I even cut my hair so boyish short so my parents could stop degrading on females, and let me just tell ya, they got mad~After senior year I was suppose to be married to another person of my culture, but I cut my hair, which represented woman-hood in our culture. Hehehe this marraige was arranged since I was born. BUT arlene here thought, hmmm, i'm not going to follow my sister's foot-steps and i do wanna go to college to support MYSELF. And that's what I did last y
Stunning New Interracial Romance is Set in the Wilds of Mexico 2007-09-06 19:02:00 Forgive Me My Love, a new book by Dean King, is a stirring love story about a white bounty hunter and a beautiful, pampered black woman. Vivid in scope, and touching on social problems of abuse and HIV, this is an insightful drama about race, revenge, and human relationships. Part action-adventure, part love story, and totally original, Dean King's Forgive Me My Love is a bold, interracial romance that will capture readers' hearts even as it tingles their spines and quickens their pulse. Dominick Rawlins is a white bounty hunter who felt drawn to the gorgeous spoiled black woman the moment he sees her. But they are from two different worlds, and it isn't until they are thrown together during one night of chaos and violence that fate steps in. But despite their fierce attraction and need for each other, their families are at war, and letting love blossom could be more deadly than standing in front of a loaded gun. King has infused the novel with characters so alive they seem to walk Read more:Stunning
, Romance
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