True Ghost
2007-10-31 20:08:46
In honor of Halloween, I thought I'd share my experiences in the most haunted house ever built in 1984. Yes, 1984...not even old or spooky.
PG and I bought that house in 2001, it was a starter and while nice, it wasn't huge or extravagant. We bought it from the people who originally had the house built. The man was dying of cancer and had bought a new house for his wife to live in. He died two weeks later.
So the first night we were there, PG, my mom, grandparents, PG's parents and I were all over there cleaning, painting etc. The house had a sunroom on the back that had storm doors on each end and windows all across it. So, my mom and I had been cleaning the carpet out there and stopped for a ciggie. We were sitting on the stairs (there were two) going down into the sunroom, and of course the windows were partially steamed up because of the wet carpet. All of a sudden, a man appears at the back door and tries to yank it open.
Read more: Ghost
Pity Party of One
2007-10-30 23:43:46
Today I dressed one of my foster puppies in his tiny costume-like apparatus and took him to my mom's work so that we could have lunch with her. Good times, and of course everyone loved this teeny little guy.
Afterward, I went to my old place of employment (it's part of the same complex as mom's work) to see my old co-workers. Walking down that familiar hallway about did me in. It's not that I regret leaving, but I'm still trying to figure out just what the hell I'm supposed to be doing these days. I'm a man, well a girl, without a country so to speak. The visit was great and I didn't break out in hives from flashbacks of maggots and all things gory.
But it did get me on the way home.
Yeah, I was having a pity party thinking about all of the people in the world who know exactly what they're supposed to be, and how to go about it. They're making big decisions and forming the cogs of great corporations while I mop the floor an
Read more: Party
SS,DD
2007-11-06 00:13:03
So here's the thing. I cannot sleep. I cannot go to sleep, and when I can, I cannot stay asleep. Instead, I sit in my chilly garage and chain smoke until it looks like Cheech and Chong's van in here. I have dark circles under my eyes and have just a slightly more aggressive outlook on life. Fortunately, I have plenty of energy during the day. But still, its not natural and I look forward to seeing what strange dreams I have. Not happening right now.
Ok, onto other things.
Since I've decided to re-floor the whole damn house, I also decided that I should venture into paint colors and turn this plain whitey into something a bit more interesting. So now, I have until Thanksgiving to paint the entire house inside, AND lay the flooring. Shouldn't be a problem when I have about 24 hours a day to do it! Its a floating floor that can be cut with a razor knife, so no need to wake PG with the frightening sounds of a sleepless wife
The big one that got away
2007-11-04 01:28:54
Ok, just so we get this over quickly, like a bandaid, let me say that I'm not an overly romantic person. Just like with Spanish, I can pick up on some romance, but can't really figure out how to speak it.
I can take it, but I can't dish it out. Flirting yes, "come hither"...no.
Well this time of year with its blazing leaves, short days, and air that is icy cold and clear sort of brings out the best in me.
But I kan't artikulate.
I giggle easily.
Now you would think that I would have this figured out after so many years with PG. But I don't. All I can do is stare at him and try to beam naughty thoughts into his head.
Quit laughing girls, I realize this is futile.
But being the rather victorian gal that I am, I simply can't bring myself to strut around like a stripper (God help his poor eyes) and get all crazy like that. I can't help it, I was raised this way. I blame my mother of course.
So last night (being a somewhat odd eve
How we roll
2007-11-03 23:46:20
I know what you're thinking....
"Reb, how the hell can you have a bunch of little dogs all the time and keep a decent house? I mean, do you live like those old women with a hundred cats? Do you have stacks of newspapers everywhere? How do you live with all of those little dogs coming and going all the time?! Your house must be a pit!"
Nope.
We build furniture!!
And no ordinary entertainment center for us!
Here's the table that we built for our kitchen to house the dog crates, and give the tv someplace to sit. It's 12 feet long, holds five LARGE dog crates, and keeps our babies rounded up when we can't be watching them (they were crated for dinner in this pic).
When we bought this house, we kept our dogs in mind. We needed a way to house the dogs and still have it look nice (I'm a freak about the house looking nice). So, we built this! It's all redwood (because we thought about clear-coating it, and decided to pai
Breaking News!
2007-11-03 14:31:48
Apparently that is NOT the end of the Vampire book! It's a whole freaking series!! YAY!! Guess who's going to Barnes and Noble today?!?!?!? MEEEEEEE!!! (And I have to get a nonfat venti chai latte there, ya know since its so handy).
Signed, One Happy Reb (who happens to be a book nerd)!!!
Read more: Breaking
Today's Highlights
2007-11-03 03:26:40
So my Vampire book, "Twilight" has nearly ended and my heart is broken. Sigh. Its so difficult to find good books these days (especially with very smooth, very sexy, very melty vampire guys like those in this particular read). So I'm looking for suggestions for future Vampire reading.
We have a foster dog going home Sunday and its also breaking my heart. I kind of thought this old guy would be with us forever. He tries my patience but is the first in line to give me hugs and kisses. One of these days rescuing is going to tear my heart out completely.
Tonight Nicko the Sicko, PG and I headed out of town and took in the sights. It was short-lived however as we somehow ended up back in town...downtown in fact. I'm not much for bars, but it was a good time. The most fun was trying to take pictures of each other in the car while PG drove. Most were neither flattering, nor correct, but the best were those taken by hold
Read more: Today
, Highlights
Don't Do It
2007-11-11 01:37:08
I don't get pissed very often, but there is one thing that turns me into a Turbo Bitch in record time.
Puppymills.
For those of you that don't know, those petstore puppies DO NOT EVER come from loving people. They come from large commercial breeders who crank out puppies as fast as they can because they make money off the people that buy them at petstores.
I'm not kidding.
My first two dogs came from a petstore. I just found out today that the hell-hole they came from in Oklahoma just auctioned off all of their "stock". Can you say OVER 400 DOGS WERE AUCTIONED?!?
OVER 400 DOGS.
Do you know how to keep over 400 dogs? You keep them in tiny cages and never pet them. They don't get walked, they don't play with toys. You don't keep them clean. You feed them bad food because anything good would cut into your profit. You perform C-Sections yourself, and de-bark them with a metal rod that oftentimes breaks their jaws.
Channeling Scarlett and Kneepads
2007-11-10 23:42:52
What do you get when you combine a car, a truck, four dog crates, a big rubbermaid box, 28 legs, and seven biting mouths? Yup, a trip to the vet for the seven puppies. Kylie's babies (aka the K-Feds) had shots today and (channeling Scarlett
), "As God is my witness..." I'll never take seven wild puppies to the vet at the same time again. Thankfully all are healthy and at 3 1/2 months old, weigh between 8 and 13.5 pounds (the boys are BIG). But in order to get them to the vet by 9:30 we had to get started early! Combine that with the fact that I finally fell asleep at 5am and it was one UGLY morning.
(Sidenote...gross warning....I actually slept in my clothes for the whopping two hours that I slept and then went to the vet like that!! MWAH HA HA HA!! EWWW!)
Back from the vet and went to work on the bane of my existence...the guest room. It was supposed to be just flooring. Now its flooring, new paint, new blinds, new bed
Read more: Channeling
Ow.
2007-11-09 08:58:56
There are a few things left that don't hurt. Sadly, none of them are attached to my body.
My hands feel like giant swollen hamburger patties with Ballpark hotdogs sticking out of them. My knees (despite kneepads) are toast. Elbows, wrists, even my neck is sore.
But I LOVE YOU new paint and flooring!
Ok, so the floor isn't even close to being done. The guest room is now painted colonial blue (second coat is on the way) with white trim. The closet floor is now done. My house looks like tornado footage from Missouri. Our lovely big Maine Coon cat, Hazel, has found a new home in the rolls of torn out carpet that are clogging the hallway. The dogs are relegated to the kitchen because undoubtedly they would find the one staple or one carpet scrap and my poor arms don't have the strength to haul them to the emergency vet.
I truly think PG is an awe of his best girl and her accomplishments.
(Well, and he's in awe that I could real
The Less Than Fairer Sex
2007-11-08 00:28:54
Now let's get something straight right off the bat. And go ahead, send me nasty comments and send the feministas to burn a wooden penis in my yard.
I'm not a feminist.
In my strange world (well, my strange mentality anyway) men should be men and women should be women. That means that when Saturday rolls around, the chicks should clean house while the men do the yard work.
(I can hear the wooden penis sizzling as I type this).
But in reality, it doesn't work that way all the time. And I'm down with that. Truly.
But apparently the men at Home Depot are just as old fashioned as I am.
And I prey on them every chance I get; pimping helpful tips and tricks from their very testosterone driven egos. In other words, I swoop in and with one glance, I can gain all the knowledge needed for most any home improvement project.
I'm a MANipulator. A Handy MANipulator.
I know its wrong, and for that I'm sorry. But since I'm not an ex
Turkey Day
2007-11-16 13:21:00
Well, the Big One is nearly upon us and as I sit here pondering just what sweater dear Dad in Law (DIL) is going to bestow upon us this year, I'm filled with a sense of dread. I mean, like curled up in a corner of the basement closet under the stairs talking to finger puppets kind of dread.
I don't want to go.
(Cue Mel Gibson, "They'll take our lives, but they'll never take our FREEDOM!")
Ok, so that's a bit over-dramatic, I admit. But Thanksgiving isn't what it used to be and this new-fangled combined family affair is just short of painful. Like a compound fracture is just short of painful. This sort of pain can only get worse once DIL starts playing the Kenny G cds and using big words like "mitigating" and "symposium" and talking golf and electronics.
I'll admit there was ONE year during my marriage when I couldn't do it, just couldn't do it. So I had the dog fixed and claimed that she couldn't be left alone.&n
Read more: Turkey
, Turkey Day
Poker, Babies, Dogs, and Nail Guns
2007-11-16 10:27:55
Yesterday, while I was installing yet more of the new flooring the phone rang. And in my mad rush to get to it, my work boots (also known as Crocs) hit one of the pieces of wax paper that comes between the pieces of flooring in the box. Needless to say, I totally crashed into the wall. Thankfully I had my trusty new kneepads on. And I got to the phone by the fourth ring.
Anyway, it was one of our long-time friends, Copper. Of course that's not his real name, but it IS his real profession. Copper is one of those guys who's not only decent to look at, but just damn decent all the way around. In other words a truly nice guy who'd give you the shirt off his back.
He and his new wife wanted to go out for the evening, along with us and another couple (we'll call them the Gardners) who we've known for gosh...almost 14 years.
So we head out and meet up with them for a fun-filled evening of cards at a local bar who hosts free card games a
Read more: Poker
, Babies
Hugger Part Four
2007-11-15 15:15:09
Well, the results of the Hugger scientific poll are still coming in. And honestly, I'm rather saddened at some of those results.
Apparently, somehow I managed to mess up and its all my fault. What I didn't realize is that a girl can be minding her own business, not talking to anyone and be hugged like that and its HER fault. I had no idea. All this time I was thinking that my "come hither" wardrobe of baggy jeans and sweatshirts, combined with a distinct lack of conversation with anyone, the fact that I wear a total of FIVE wedding rings on one finger, and having a KNOWN husband would be enough to keep me from catching the blame.
But I was SO wrong indeed.
Now, the point of contention seems to be that I told the Hugger that he shouldn't do that anymore and pushed his shoulders away with both hands. According to some, I SHOULD have kneed him in the groin, and because I didn't...its MY fault.
Huh.....
Now PG still thinks the whole t
Full Frontal Hugging - Take 3
2007-11-15 00:43:45
(I can't seem to get over this...and I hate it when PG wins a bet.)
Ok, so we've determined (through very scientific research. har.) that most men would not be offended if another guy came onto their wife. I'm still baffled by this, but hey the numbers are there. Believe me, I'm pretty surprised too.
Which leads me to wonder WHY this is, exactly.
(I'm going through a philosophical phase apparently.)
And since I read a lot of historical stuff (I collect old books and diaries, in case you weren't aware) and I'm quite certain that 100 years ago, this sort of behavior would've had a far different response. Of course 100 years ago, we gals were quite a bit different too.
Which leads me to wonder what has changed? Is it because we (girls I mean) have demanded to be treated as equals to men? Is it because men are now expected to do more domestic duties and help care for the kids? I don't know.
But it REALLY makes me wonder what it would
Read more: Hugging
Full Frontal Hugging - Part 2
2007-11-14 20:20:18
So I told PG about the Mad Hugger. I thought he'd be pissed at the guy. At worst, I thought he'd think twice about me going back to this place without him. But no, he laughed.
He laughed.
So I questioned his "man-hormones" and told him that I thought most men would be pissed if they found out that a guy was hugging (and stroking) a known married girl. He disagreed and said that most men would be OK with it. We made a bet on it (you know me, when I have a point to make, there's always a bet involved).
So I'm taking votes on a forum that has a lot of men. Manly men, not those touchy-feely, in touch with their feminine side kind of guys. These are manly men with guns, tools, and beer.
And sadly, I'm LOSING!
It seems that the majority of men don't see a problem with this picture. However, a few of us girls would be pretty pissed if the same thing happened to our guys. Very interesting indeed!
Apparently the
Read more: Hugging
Lost my Focus
2007-11-14 15:07:35
I'm the dorkiest photographer. Nice camera, but I don't know how to use it well. Anyway, I took H (the mixy little wild foster man) out to see if I could catch a pic for the theme "The Focus
of Your Life" which of course HAD to be about dogs. And being a dork, I entered the one that's severely out of focus.
H was sitting in a shelter, all sorts of skin and bones, and no one wanted him. What a shame at only three years old. Anyway, I'm calling this photo "Three Hours" because that's all the longer he had to live. Nowadays he's wild as a march hare, sweet as pie, and the perfect little doggie.
Full Frontal Hugging
2007-11-14 11:59:49
Yesterday I ran into a guy that I barely know, but we recognized each other. I don't know his name, but he knows mine. Anyway, he grabbed me in a bear hug and held me there for what seemed like...hours. Now this wasn't one of those one arm, friend-kind of hugs...it was a Full Frontal Hug. The kind that leaves no room for a toothpick to be slid between.
Now, I'm not overly freaky about personal space (no more so than the next girl). But while he had his muscular meat hooks around me, he rubbed my back (we're talking all the way from top to almost-bottom) and whispered directly in my ear, asking about my day, etc.
This happens to me quite a bit. Or it DID before I left my job to join the ranks of the housewives.
I think its the bewbies.
My theory is that men, well some of them at least, are polite enough not to try the "brush and run" and instead opt for the Full Frontal Hug. This allows them to cop a feel without copping
Read more: Hugging
Reb's Guide to Holiday Survival-Coming Soon!
2007-11-13 10:47:49
Starting right after Thanksgiving, I'll be posting "Reb's Guide
to Holiday
Survival". It'll take several posts, and will pertain to those with dogs, without dogs, with horrible in-laws, Scrooge Spouses, etc. So look for it after Thanksgiving!
For now though, let's get through Turkey Day. If you're wanting to be head of the class at Reb's Holiday School for the Insane, you'll pick up a small spiral notebook and a pen to clip on it. That's your homework assignment!
Read more: Coming Soon
Oh yes, I Can-Can
2007-11-12 21:38:50
(I love you too, Jackie.)
So today was a violin lesson (flanked by two vet appointments). Sadly, I hadn't practiced at all this week because my swollen sausage hands were so sore from pulling carpet pad staples. But I went anyway and prepared myself for a tongue lashing from the Teach.
But I didn't get one!! Nanny nanny boo boo.
Why? Because I managed to pull it off and actually SOUND like I knew what I was doing! I even played whole songs that I hadn't even looked at before. No pressure there! She said I'm sailing through REALLY fast and have a natural ability.
Yeah, a natural ability to BS my way through it.
But this week's assignment is to learn the "Can-Can" and I'm pretty sure I won't be able to BS that one. So, I'm already practicing and will have that song permanently emblazoned on my psyche for the rest of my natural life.
In other news....
The home improvement projects are rolling along, though slower on
HAPPY VETERAN'S DAY!
2007-11-12 11:38:42
You usually hear me talk about vets as in those who fix my sick babies. But let's not forget those who've served our country and made the ultimate sacrifice for the rest of us.
HAPPY VETERAN'S DAY AND THANK YOU FOR SERVING OUR COUNTRY!
Jack
2007-11-21 13:21:31
Jack (my beautiful, smart, wonderful little stick-figure dog) went to the vet this morning to have a bump looked at. The vet told me it is most likely a hemangiosarcoma (fancy word for a cancerous bump). They're removing it on Monday and will test it. She said that if it WAS cancerous, he had only six months to a year. He's only seven years old, otherwise completely healthy.
Well, I'm not taking this lying down. Not this Reb. You won't find me crying in my cornflakes until ALL avenues have been exhausted. I'm not the type to throw up my hands and turn his life over.
We're ready for a fight.
I've been doing some research and have discovered that if it IS cancer, there is the potential to remove the whole thing. Now, with this cancer, it occurs in the blood vessels, which means he may have some inside too. So, I'm demanding the following....
1. Remove the bump and determine if its cancer.
2. If it is ca
Shooting Cards
2007-11-21 02:48:05
Tonight, long after PG was sound asleep, I got out the card table to take photos for a contest. The theme this week is "Fun Pastimes". Well, that pretty much boils down to dogs, poker, and dogs and since I photo'd a dog last week, I thought I would try poker.
Except I have very little knowledge on how to work the camera. In fact, compared to the other nice folks who participate in this weekly contest, I'm nothing more that a drooling ignoramus.
Since I don't have much idea about lighting, or how to change the flash (can you change it?) I have to rely on things around the house to help me along. For instance, I had to drag the poker table clear downstairs and set it up in a hallway in order to use the oh-so-high-tech hallway light. But because the card table is actually just a table-top (and I had no available legs), I had to bellyflop (OK, boob flop) on the ground to get the angle just right. Add in the fact that Hazel, the Grumpiest C
Read more: Cards
Haggatha Eats Crow
2007-11-18 04:50:48
So, PG and I decided to have an early dinner out (duh, yet another day without cooking) and I left the restaurant choice up to him. He's pickier about those sorts of things than I am, and I was REALLY glad to just be going somewhere, anywhere. He chose a place that's literally clear across our major city in a part of town that I don't know very well. I've been to this restaurant before, but its been a long time.
Here goes the subtle hint.
I ask him if we should take X highway or Y highway. I explained that I didn't know which exit, and he didn't either. I then go finish getting ready (oh yeah, jewelry, perfume, etc etc etc....I was looking forward to somewhat of a date night).
So we hop in the speedy auto and head out. But then comes the fork in the road, and which highway to take? I ask him. His response, "I don't know". So I ask again, "Which way is shorter?". He's not sure.
And then Haggatha
Oh Photos
2007-11-26 13:53:52
Have you ever wondered what would happen if you mixed together donuts, bagels, fruit loops, super glue, wooden skewers, and play doh?
If so, here's your answer!!
The theme is "Things that make you say OOOOH". I know this is pretty obvious, but it was fun just the same.
What's going on
2007-11-26 10:50:29
Jack is at the vet this morning having his bumps removed. I barely made it out before I was bawling like a baby. I mean, I'm the slayer of dragons, the one on top of it, a person who SAVES dogs. I can mobilize in minutes to get a dog from another state. I can get a dog in another country to safety. But I can't do anything to stop what's going on with Jack. Its pretty damn hard to turn him over to someone else to save, and to wait at home for the phone call that he made it through surgery, then days later the phone call telling me how much fight we're going to have to muster.
So, I'll be drawing on the fight and try that's gotten me this far. I've had my share of experience with naysayers, the unknown, and learning on the fly. Let's hope its enough. Above all else, let's hope that Jack's results come back negative. Meanwhile, I'm going to stay busy and keep Jack's lifelong companion, Gracie company whi
Shopping, Reb-Style
2007-11-25 11:12:40
If you're anything like me, the thought of fighting crowds, crying children, strollers, lines, and other angry shoppers has me shaking and having nightmares. Ok, so maybe its not that bad and there is something to be said about the holiday vibe that the marketing gurus manage to infuse into the malls across America. However, this year I have a dream, a goal, and it has nothing to do with the mall.
Last night I sat down with my tricky notebook (see previous post) and started shopping online. My goal this year is to have ALL of my Christmas shopping do double duty. In other words, if a donation isn't made, I'm not shopping there. So, I managed to get some really cool stuff from The Greater Good Network. These are the people that have the "click a day" program to benefit animals, the rainforest, literacy, world hunger, and breast cancer. I've ordered lots of things from them before and have never had a bad transaction. They ha
Read more: Shopping
, Style
Reb's Guide to Holiday Survival - Part One
2007-11-24 12:46:02
The Notebook aka The Christmas Survival Bible
(The purpose of the notebook is not only to organize your ideas and thoughts, but to take the pressure off your brain. You CANNOT remember everything you need to know during the holidays without forgetting things, and this little gem will keep you from sleepless nights and forgotten gifts. Think of it as an external hardrive for your overworked mind.)
Ok, grab your little notebook (or run right out and buy one at the grocery store, don't forget to get milk and bread while you're there). Make sure it will easily fit in your purse (if you're a purse carrying individual). If you have a large paperclip, stick it on the back cover.
On the first page of the notebook, I want you to write the names of EVERY person you plan to buy a gift for this year. Think really hard and put down those names that you MAY buy a gift for as well. Put a teeny dot next to the names of those who live out of town, and who's gi
Read more: Guide
, Holiday
First Annual Sammich and Pie Day!
2007-11-22 04:11:33
In honor of my friends on a certain forum...
I DECLARE SATURDAY TO BE....
MAKE YOUR MAN A SAMMICH AND PIE DAY!!!
There are no rules except that it has to be a GOOD sammich (not just pbj unless of course, he REALLY likes PBJ). And the pie has to be homemade (or at least seem like it is).
There you go girls, show your guy just how much you appreciate him!! If you spend too much on black friday, this will take his mind off of it. If you've (like me) been somewhat of a Haggatha lately, he'll forget all about it.
Now if you don't have a guy, make YOURSELF a sammich and pie! You'll thank me later when you're lip-smacking that tasty treat in front of the tube!
Make him a sammich and a pie!!
Read more: First
, Annual
Cheesecake, because I can....
2007-11-22 02:31:14
It's something way after midnight and I'm up baking the world's most gorgeous White Chocolate Raspberry Swirl Cheesecake
. Is it because I want to share something lovely with my family for Thanksgiving?
Nope, its because I'm a vindictive bitch.
I'm a vindictive bitch who CAN cook.
Rewind back about five years and you would've found my mother-in-law telling me that I can't cook. I remember very fondly that day, that moment in her kitchen.
(Note to those who are unfamiliar with Rebels...if you tell them they can't do something, they will literally kill themselves to prove you wrong. Its in our genes, every cell becomes fixated on proving a naysayer wrong.)
Anyway, since then I have have made superhuman efforts to prove to her that I CAN in fact run a stove. In fact, its gotten so bad at family gatherings that it makes me blush. I get a lot of compliments which chinks her size six hiney and makes me feel pretty damn good.
Quite honestly, if it we
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