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Happy Fourth of July and then Bite Me!
2007-07-04 06:58:00
Happy Fourth of July, happy fourth of July, happy fourth of July, happy fourth of July [sing those word along to the "Happy Birthday" song...tons of fun]  Oh, and please don't blow off your fingers today.  K? Mrs. Kate over at Electric Venom is doing another Tuesday Bite Me.  Since I need/want more traffic and since she's nice enough to do this, I'm putting a link to her "Bite Me" right HERE.
Read more: Happy

I went to the museum/zoo and it was fun!
2007-07-03 19:16:00
After about two and a half hours, I finally got to the Tallahassee Museum.  Since Cara and I got there about thirty minutes before everyone and I had to pee, we went ahead and went in by ourselves.  Imagine me pushing Cara in her big ole stroller and trying to open the doors.  It was rather humorous.  After fighting my way through the damn door, I pulled out my wallet, fully expecting to shell


Because Morning Joe is Cool and Other Ramblings.
2007-07-03 07:31:00
This is the video where Mika Brzezinski rips up the "news" report on Paris Hilton.  I figured that I would toss this out there since I freaking love it.  It has three elements that I find rather enjoyable.  #1 Joe Scarborough.  #2 Mika Brzezinski.  #3 A Paris Hilton story not being treated as news.  All three make me smile.  I've talked before about how I think Joe Scarborough is one cool feller
Read more: Morning

Look What I Won!
2007-08-26 14:57:37
Woot Woot! [Not really sure what that means, but I think it’s supposed to be an exclamation of happiness] I wrote this and won randomly. I enjoy randomness. Free stuff is fun. I’m cheap. I just watched Shooter. It was good. I just realized that the main character is Marky Mark and not Matt Damon. I like movies. Movies are fun. Where are those pictures of your name tattoos? Send ‘em already! [I warned you I like randomness.]


Pan’s Labyrinth and KFC
2007-08-26 08:56:45
Man, Friday was one of those days. I was having business issues that required emails back and forth and the issue still isn’t resolved. In the middle of the emails, my cable went out…Tucker went ahead and got it disconnected. [Refer here] Add to all of that the fact that I had gotten no sleep the night before and you have yourself a very cranky crazy lady. Tucker has duty this weekend and when he finally got home Friday night [around 7pm] I was pretty much done with everything and everyone. So, that’s my excuse for not writing anything yesterday; I didn’t feel like it. I needed a break. To help me recover from my crap day, Tucker got me some KFC [I was having major cravings for chicken!] and rented some movies. Pan’s Labyrinth . Ever heard of it? Did you know that it’s in Spanish? The movie came out in 2006 and I remember hearing about it and seeing previews for it on TV, but I honestly don’t remember ever hearing that it was a Spanish


Always Amazingly Awesome Montero
2007-08-24 13:59:55
Dear Lola, How is it that you rock so much? Not only are you amazingly dependable, you manage to transport all of my crap and I love you for that. Though some may scoff at your large size and chastise me for having such a large vehicle, you and I know that your size is an asset not an issue. Sure, I don’t particularly enjoy filling your over-sized gas tank. But, I do it anyway since I know that if I do, you’ll take me to Starbucks. [I’m easy that way] Remember all of the trips we’ve taken together? Like last Christmas, when we drove from Florida to Arkansas and back and Tucker was able to fill you with all of our crap, Cara’s crap AND all of Cara’s presents. Good times. I love the fact that I can pack the dogs, Cara, me, Tucker, Cara’s stroller and a big cooler and go to the beach and not have ot worry about if everything will fit. Plus, we both know that I’m a bit vain and you look way cooler than a minivan. So, hats off to you, Lola.


Opinion Articles
2007-08-24 12:22:58
In the interest of full disclosure [I’m all about full disclosure], I figured that I would let you guys know about the reviews that I’ve been writing that are located under “Crazy Reviews“. I can’t post those reviews here since it would violate Blogher’s terms of service and that’s no fun. But, when I write a review, I can let you know that I did along with a link to the review. Just thought I’d let you know…that and I wanted to draw a purty picture. And Kate should Bite Me.
Read more: Articles

Campaign to Prevent “Name” Tattoos
2007-08-24 10:17:13
How many of you guys have tattoos? Come on, raise your hands. Now, how many of you have a “name tattoo”? I won’t laugh, I promise. Haven’t you heard that it’s bad juju to have someone’s name tattooed on you? Think of this as a public service announcement of sorts. My friend Alana recently got a tattoo of her hubby’s name on her ankle [Hi Alana!] and the husband of another friend got her name on his chest. What happens if they get a divorce? (I don’t think that I’m being a pessimist…maybe a realist?) But I think it’s more than that for me. I think it really boils down to it being bad luck. Why risk it? I won’t get Tucker’s name tattooed on me for the same reason that I knock on wood and hold my breath while I pass cemeteries…I’m superstitious. While I’m on the subject of “name” tattoos, if you have one, email me a picture and I’ll post it here with a link to your site
Read more: Campaign , Tattoos

GNMParents. Today. Be There!
2007-08-23 07:55:43
I have a new article up at GNMParents. Here are the first two paragraphs. You’ll have to head over there though to read the rest. When I was younger (around 10), I decided that I would have an unmedicated birth. Why my ten year-old self was so concerned with birthin’ babies, I’m not quite sure. Looking back on it now, I wonder if some of that determination to have a “natural” birth stemmed from me being adopted and wanting a “real” birth…who knows? …more.
Read more: Today

The Britney Spears Interview
2007-08-23 06:00:11
Have you gotten in your latest issue of Allure? I’m not usually a fan [got the subscription as a gift] but I have to say that the “interview” with Britney Spears is worth the cover price. Did you just shudder a bit when you read that cause I almost threw-up in my mouth when I typed it. But, stick with me. Go to your local quickie mart and pick up a copy. Flip to the very back and read the damn good article written by Judith Newman. I flipped to page 250 and was struck by page 251 [a picture of Spears with her arms covering her breaths]. Spears looks really good for having had two C-sections in as many years. I can’t help but wonder how much editing was involved with that picture. [Click here for a great example] I was expecting a fluff piece; Newman admits early on that the article was supposed to be “[Spears’s] comeback interview”. Newman admits that right after going off on a diatribe about what she would do if she were in Spears’s


Worst Mom Ever!
2007-08-22 11:56:24
I turned off the baby monitor this morning. When? Yeah, not so sure about that little detail. I know that I turned it off after midnight since that’s when I broke Harry’s spell on me. I woke up this morning at 7:30 and Cara was pissed!  Her door was closed and I could still hear her from our room. I jumped out of bed, tripped over the cat and ran into her room. I’m not quite sure how long she had been in there hollering, but she wasn’t crying when I went in there.  The lack of tears leads me to believe that she hadn’t been in there awake for too long. Ok.  So I guess that little incident wasn’t too bad.  It was nothing compared to the time I tossed her in the tub and then ran down to the corner store.  [I’m joking!  It wasn’t me.] And since I really don’t have a separate post thought up for Kate’s Bite Me, I guess I’ll just add that here.


Cake and Harry Potter
2007-08-22 08:12:44
You know what I like? I like it when I screw-up and it turns out good. Yesterday, in between reading book 7 of the Harry Potter Series, I made a chocolate cake from scratch. One of those jobbers that your grandma probably made that’s so thin and runny when you put it in the oven that you’re convinced that you screwed up somehow. The recipe called for a 1/4 cup of cocoa. I had about an 1/8 of a cup. Did I give up? Nope! I added a teaspoon of vanilla and a teaspoon of cinnamon and hoped for the best. Amazingly enough, the cakes taste like snicker-doodle cookies. How did that happen? I’m not quite sure. But, those cakes sure were tasty. ****************************************** Do I have a good excuse for not writing anything yesterday? Not really. Part of it was that I was/am reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Yep, I finally succumbed to the series. I fought the good fight, but in the end, it was futile. I’ve been bitten so badly by this s


Ducking Rocks
2007-08-20 14:42:17
I’m really going to piss a lot of you off by admitting this, but I agree with this. Now, hold on. Before you start throwing stones, give me a chance. “If women spent more time doing stuff, as opposed to staring in the mirror, they could accomplish great things. Unfortunately, women no longer want to be the best person they can possibly be. They just want to be slightly better than their neighbor.” Can you really argue with that? Don’t you see that everyday? How many women do you know who judge themselves not based upon their “best” but on what is better than the person next to them? How many women do you know who constantly compare themselves to their friends and family? Who constantly aspire to mediocrity? [Are you one of them? I know that I’m guilty of it more times than I care to admit.] “Not that there is anything wrong with being a Mother, mind you. I just don’t think women should be Mothers and nothing else. Motherhood shou
Read more: Rocks

GNMParents. Today. Be There!
2007-08-30 07:33:29
My most recent post is up at GNMParents.com. Since my post yesterday, I’ve been having a hankerin for some Oblivion…or maybe some Sims 2:Seasons. [I haven’t decided yet] So, peruse my articles at GNMParents and my archives and hopefully I’ll be back later on today to write something pithy. A sample for your reading enjoyment: If I had met you seven years ago and you had told me that I was going to be a stay-at-home mom, I would have laughed in your face. I’m being completely serious. I had big plans and being a mom before I was thirty wasn’t included anywhere in those plans. When we moved to Florida, my education options flew out the window. Though I took some online courses at the local community college, I just didn’t feel the same love that I had felt at my old university. I found a full-time job at a very prestigious medical institution and decided that I had found a job that could eventually turn into a career. …more.
Read more: Today

Assassin’s Creed, I Love You
2007-08-29 10:00:50
Dear reader, I am about to write about a video game. [I might write a lot] If you would rather not read about said video game, might I direct you here [post about homemade baby-food] or here [where I compare and contrast Ferber and Pantley] or maybe even here [conversation about anal bleaching]. Smoochie, Crazy *************************************************************** Well, now that that is out of the way. Assassin ’s Creed is one of those games that can make a console. [think Halo for Xbox] When the gaming world got its first look at E3 in 2006, Assassin’s Creed “brought down the house”. The game promised almost limitless environment interaction where every wall can be scaled and your actions in a crowd determine how that crowd will treat you. My first look at Assassin’s Creed was in Game Informer’s extensive article back in June of ‘06. The screen shots and in-depth discussion of the concept of the game left me drooling. Up until th


The Park Tastes Good
2007-08-29 08:12:26
Cara and I went to the park yesterday. Why the hell I had never thought to go to the park before now, I’m not quite sure. With the exception of me sweating my ass off, I had fun and I think that she did too. She particularly enjoyed the substrate at the park. And by enjoyed, I mean she liked eating it. I love my little goat girl.


This Much I Know
2007-08-28 12:00:10
I like lists. They’re easy to scan, they get right to the heart of whatever you’re writing about and they look nice. This is my truncated list of things that I know; my list of things that I don’t know would take too long to write. I know that eating a big ole bucket of extra crispy KFC is not conducive to loosing weight. I know that I love being a stay at home mom and despite what some may say, I’m not wasted potential. I know that Cara thoroughly enjoys raiding my onion/garlic drawer. I know that Tucker rocks because he brought home milk and powdered donuts this morning after PT. I know that my greatest fear right now is what will happen when Tucker gets out of the Navy and we move back to Arkansas. I know that I don’t like the idea of someone else having control of what I write on my blog and how I write it. I know that Interred with Their Bones is a great book and it’s kicking my ass right now. I know that my mother-in-law kicks much ass and I


Is it a Bird? Is it a Plane?
2007-08-28 08:56:06
It’s a sippy-cup! Cool, huh? I was over at mod*mom this morning and she has an announcement about Boon releasing some really cool toddler meal time items. We have the Frog Pod and love it and I’m getting really excited to see these new things in the stores. I think that they’re cool and figured that you might too.
Read more: Plane

A Continuation on Picture Monday
2007-08-27 13:31:21
So, after posting those three pictures earlier, I realized just how much I really had needed some make-up [and maybe a shirt that fit]. One thing you should know about my “high-school years” is that my mom didn’t/doesn’t wear make-up and refused to buy me any. She didn’t necessarily disapprove of me wearing make-up, she just made it rather difficult for me to get my hands on any. Since I didn’t have a job for the vast majority of the time during high-school, my only options were out and out theft, or relying on make-up charity from friends. In an attempt to make up for those first two pictures, I figured I would post a picture of me all grown-up. I like the present better than the past anyway.
Read more: Picture , Monday

Picture Monday
2007-08-27 08:35:21
I woke up this morning with cereal in mind for breakfast and we’re out of milk. This displeased me greatly. Then, Nathan [ex-boyfriend from high-school/college] emailed me these pictures and made me feel even better. So, I figured that I would share my pictures with you. These are all from senior year. Who knows? I might even make this a “thing”. I really can’t believe that I didn’t wear makeup to school. What the hell was I thinking?
Read more: Picture , Monday

She Thinks I’m Nice
2007-09-02 17:14:21
You see this?  This nifty little badge? This means that I’m nice. At least Oh, The Joys seems to think so.  So, everyone out there who thinks I’m mean can suck it. [In-laws, if you’re reading this, I don’t mean you]


For Once It Wasn’t the Cat
2007-09-02 07:55:58
I have a funny little story for you. [Alana, quit reading since you said you didn’t want to hear it] One day last week while I was working on the computer, I heard a ruckus behind me. When I swiveled my chair around to see what the commotion was about, I saw Sophie on her back; she was rolling on something. Cara was sitting right next to the rolling dog and thought that the whole spectacle was hilarious. I stomped over to where they were, cussing the cat the whole time since I assumed that the cat had done something disgusting in that particular spot. Once I got over to Sophie, she jumped up with a look of shame on her face. I just knew it was the cat then. So, Sophie jumped up and I got ready to smell the carpet [ick] when Cara grabbed something large and dark off of the carpet. Yep. You guessed it. [and given the fact that there’s a big ass cockroach picture in this post it shouldn’t have been hard] Cara had a cockroach in her hand the size OF HER HAND. In Flori


Can I Get an Inhaler with that Dandelion?
2007-08-31 08:12:19
Does this picture offend you? I really can’t decide, so I want you guys to decide for me. [ok…not really] Whether you formula feed or breastfeed, you can’t deny the superiority of breastmilk to formula. I’m not passing judgment. I’m not pointing fingers. I’m just stating a fact. From an advertising standpoint, this ad works…unless it pisses you off and then it’s a failure. But, it does its job. Right? It makes you stop and think. It’s obviously a conversation starter or I wouldn’t be writing about it. Good job, Office on Women’s Health. Oh, wait. You changed the ad? To what? What the hell is that? Are those supposed to be boobs? They don’t really look like boobs. I bet the guy who came up with this one looks at softballs and apples and tires and thinks boobs too. While the first ad was a conversation piece because it’s a tad bit controversial, this thing leaves me wondering what it’s supposed
Read more: Inhaler

Joy, Joy Friday
2007-08-31 07:25:06
If these insanely cute kittens died a horrible death, I wouldn’t be too broken up about it. Tucker happened upon the video last night and Cara was shrieking with joy. [appropriate, no?] After thirty times, the cuteness wears off. Trust me. But, I figured that I should share the vomit inducing adorableness. Enjoy. And since I know that Kate will enjoy this, she can Bite Me.
Read more: Friday

I’m a Guest Poster
2007-09-25 10:02:10
Around the beginning of this month, I wrote this. I did it more for myself than anything…I was feeling a bit guilty for not talking about Gov. Huckabee. A mass email was sent out by Gov. Huckabee’s campaign asking for submissions for their website. What the hell. I might as well send mine along. Low and behold, they published the damn thing. Click here for the link.
Read more: Guest , Poster

Heroes: Season Premier
2007-09-24 20:29:08
I’m watching the season premier of Heroes right now. Don’t worry, I’m not “live blogging”; it’s at commercial. Thus far, it’s rocked. Hiro’s back in the 17th century, Claire is in a new school and has met an intriguing boy, West [there are rumors that he’s “gifted“], Hiro’s dad just found out that he has 24 hours to live and we see Nathan Petrelli looking rather rough and drunk. It’s back on…gotta go! *Edited to say: Claire’s dad fucking rocks!* Well, damn. I guess I am “live blogging”. This would be so much easier with a laptop. [hint, hint] Hiro’s “hero” is a white guy and Hiro “broke history” and Hiro just got some goat lovin’. Doh! Oh my God! Hiro’s dad just died! Peter Petrelli was just found handcuffed!  He’s alive!  Woo Hoo. And it’s over.  Sad times.
Read more: Season , Premier

Bite Me
2007-09-28 09:31:31
Kate has her bi-weekly Bite Me up at her site. Since I can’t think of anything to write about today, I figured I’d start with this and go from there.


Ten Amazingly Intersting Things About Me
2007-09-27 09:26:14
I guess it was a mistake to #1 admit that this was the first meme that I had been tasked with and #2 tag Doodaddy with it. 1. What were you doing ten years ago? 10 years ago, I was in high school. I’m not telling you what year though. 2. What were you doing one year ago? One year ago, I was being very pregnant 3. What are five snacks you enjoy? mushrooms strawberries rum and coke flour tortilla chips [OH MY GOD!] baby carrots with ranch 4. What are five songs you know the lyrics to? The Elephant Song Smells Like Teen Spirit London Calling Under Pressure Lipstick Vogue 5. Five Things You Would Do If You Were A Millionaire Pay off all bills including student loans Buy a house Start Cara a college fund Buy a laptop Invest whatever was left 6. Five Bad Habits I cuss a whole hell of a lot I drive really fast I smoke I talk a whole lot I am a horrible speller 7. Five Things You Like To Do Read Horseback riding Cook Talk to Tucker Bitch 8. Five Things You Would


Stupid Dad
2007-10-31 09:49:15
I am so utterly pissed right now. Pissed and hurt. To make a long story not as long, my dad sucked as a father. He missed “his weekends”, probably molested me and he stalked my mom. I’ve gotten (or am getting) pass all of that as best I can. Several years ago, Dad remarried. His wife was/is an amazingly strong, wonderful woman who game him two great kids in addition to the son who she had from a previous marriage. Let me just say here that my dad is crazy. Certifiably crazy. His jealousy and delusions ruined their marriage. The divorce was sad for the kids but honestly best for everyone involved. Also, that divorce gave Dad a chance that most people never get…a chance to do things over. That’s all well and good, but Dad has utterly squandered this opportunity. Not only is he playing the same old games that he played with my mom, now he’s calling my step-mother a bitch to the kids. How awesome is that? I wish that I could call him up and ask him
Read more: Stupid

Wordless Wednesday
2007-11-14 07:49:46

Read more: Wednesday

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