Owner: The B-Movie Catechism URL:http://b-moviecat.blogspot.com/ Join Date: Tue, 26 Jun 2007 20:00:15 -0500 Rating:0 Site Description: One man's desperate attempt to reconcile his love of his Catholic faith with his passion for really, really bad movies. Site statistics:Click here
INTERMISSION: ABOMINABLE SNOWMEN 2008-01-21 12:01:37 As I was just reminded by D. G. D. Davidson, The Sci-Fi Catholic, I once again completely forgot about the film club THAT I STARTED. That probably doesn't bode well for the film club as a lasting feature here, but we'll see. Anyway, once again, those still interested in having a paragraph or two included in the film club review of the Vincent Price classic House On Haunted Hill, feel free to leave a comment in the combox, drop me an email at eegahinc@gmail.com with your review, or just send a link to your post sometime over the next couple of days. My excuse this time. Snow! It's impossible to explain to those of you who don't live south of Tennessee the extent to which apocalyptic zeal seizes this part of the country when white stuff begins falling from the sky. How much did we get
FIRST CLOVERFIELD MONSTER SIGHTING 2008-01-17 08:01:40 Here it is, here it is! Okay, I can't really back that up, but wouldn't it have been cool if this really were the case?
SHORT FEATURE: PRINCES IN AGONY 2008-01-11 23:26:57 Just in case you don't recognize these little ditties, this is the song Agony and its reprise from the Broadway production of Into The Woods. If you don't know the play, don't worry, it won't take long to recognize these are the fabled Charming brothers singing of their princely woes. Also perfectly obvious is what's wrong with these idiots. But since I've had the audacity to include the word catechism in my blog title, it's probably a good idea to include something from The Catechism to further clarify things. "The chaste person maintains the integrity of the powers of life and love placed in him. This integrity ensures the unity of the person; it is opposed to any behavior that would impair it. It tolerates neither a double life nor duplicity in speech. Chastity includes an a
COMING ATTRACTIONS: PRINCE OF DARKNESS 2008-01-10 15:28:05 Dark conspiracies in the Catholic Church? Quantum physics? Alice Cooper as a zombie? Donald Pleasence as a crazy priest? What took us so long to get to this film? Our low budget John Carpenter film fest continues with 1987's Prince of Darkness.
OUTTAKES 2008-03-24 19:49:33 For those of you who get the above reference, please pray for my immortal soul. (I'm not right in the head, I know.) The shaky start to my sophomore year on this blog continues due to a number of personal difficulties. (Which could use a prayer or two also, now that I think of it.) I'll get my act together soon, but until then, there's always room for more cartoons...
OUTTAKES 2008-03-29 16:29:38 Alright. I'm about sick of being sick. Another four days down the drain doped up on antihistamines, unable to form a coherent thought, and falling hopelessly behind in work and blogging. What would Benny Hinn and the rest of those boys say?
REOPENING SOON 2008-04-08 23:00:27 Due to some sudden pressing personal business which had to be attended to out there in the non-celluloid world, I've kind of let things around here go to pot for a couple of weeks. However, life has now settled to an acceptable level of chaos and the ticket booth should reopen in the next day or so. Thanks for your patience.
COMING ATTRACTIONS: CARNIVAL OF SOULS 2008-04-13 07:57:57 Now that we're up and running again it's time to take care of some reader requests. Let's start with one of my favorites, the 1962 cult classic Carnival Of Souls. And just in case there's some confusion, yes, there was a 1998 (alleged) remake produced by Wes Craven whose description begins "A young girl witnesses the brutal rape and murder of her mother by a circus clown..." This is not that film.
SHORT FEATURE: THE KARNIVAL KID 2008-04-14 23:40:36 Our short feature this time around is 1929's The Karnival Kid in which Minnie Mouse plays a "shimmy dancer" and Mickey Mouse speaks his very first onscreen words right before spanking his wiener. What? That's exactly what happens! Watch it yourself and see. ********** 7 MINUTES AND 40 SECONDS LATER ********** See, I told you so. Whaaaat? Everything I said happens in the cartoon is 100% accurate. Is it my fault you took it the wrong way? Okay, yeah, it probably was. According to the Catechism "A lie consists in speaking a falsehood with the intention of deceiving... To lie is to speak or act against the truth in order to lead someone into error." It's highly likely that to "act against the truth" includes the concept of "underdisclosure", which is
OUTTAKES 2008-04-23 21:19:40 The Catholic Frog (Notaden Bennetti) is a yellow or greenish Australian myobatrachid about 4 cm (1.5 inches) long. It was named for the dark, cross-like pattern on its back. - Encyclopedia Britannica
SHORT FEATURE: CINDY GOES TO A PARTY 2008-04-27 23:15:45 So, why am I giving you a second short before our feature presentation of Carnival of Souls? The first reason is obvious... I'm buying more time to write the review. The second reason is that Herk Harvey, director of Carnival of Souls, turns out to have also helmed over 400 educational and industrial films throughout the 50s and 60s. You MSTies out there may remember Mike and The Bots take on Herk's expressionistic classic Cheating. Cindy Goes To A Party isn't quite so sturm und drang as it tells the lighthearted story of a little girl upset over not receiving an invitation to a friend's soiree. The night before the party Cindy's fairy godmother, apparently channeling Bjork, appears to inform her she will indeed receive an invitation, but only if she stops being such an uncouth slob and
CARNIVAL OF SOULS 2008-05-09 23:53:16 THE TAGLINE: "A new wave picture you cannot forget! A sensation about a new dimension!" THE PLOT: Emerging from a river following a terrible car accident which claimed the lives of all of her friends, Mary Henry decides to hurriedly leave town and accept a job as a church organist in Salt Lake City. Just short of her destination, Mary first begins to see visions of a ghoulish man leering at her through the car window, and then spots an abandoned pavilion off in the distance to which she feels oddly drawn. Continuing on to her new home, Mary does her best to settle into her new life, but can't escape the cold feelings of isolation and detachment which have eaten away at her since the accident. Her efforts to return to normalcy aren't made any easier due to the lecherou
COMING ATTRACTIONS: SEX MADNESS 2008-05-10 21:57:37 Yes, you're at the right blog. No, there's been no sudden startling changes in my personal beliefs. Yes, I'm absolutely bringing you... SEXXXXXX MADNESSSS!Actually, this little gem is from the same folks who gave you Reefer Madness. There's no real trailer available, but I threw together the introduction and one of the more, um... dramatic scenes to give you an idea of what the movie has in store.
WEEKLY NEWSREEL 2008-05-12 22:47:00 Good evening Mr. & Mrs. Catholic, and all you other Christians at sea. Welcome to the Weekly Newsreel version 3.0. Third time's the charm we've heard it said, so perhaps this format will last longer than the previous two incarnations. This time around we plan to bring you what all good newsreels should, which is... newsreels. (Startling, I know.) So, in honor of this week's (or two weeks or ho
OUTTAKES 2008-05-15 22:28:50 Ba dum dum! That's the joke folks! Oh well, anybody coming to this blog looking for subtle humor must not have been here before. May 15th is the feast day for St. Isidore (who looks strikingly like John Saxon in this portrait) so be sure to say a prayer for farmers, day laborers, Madrid, and the United States National Rural Life Conference.
SHORT FEATURE: STOP THE MADNESS 2008-05-18 23:07:43 Yeah, we've had a few laughs over the past few weeks at the expense of goofy educational films from the early 20th century. Yet how canst we say to our older brothers, Brothers, let us pull out the mote that is in thine eye, when we ourselves beholdest not the beam that is in our own eye? Which is a nice King James way of saying that while those guys way back then were kind of nutty, in th
SEX MADNESS 2008-06-04 00:03:42 THE TAGLINE "She sought big thrills... and caught big trouble! A country girl finds the crimson road." THE PLOT Paul Lorenz, son of the local anti-syphilis crusader, and a group of his pals head out to the Glorified Burlesque to catch a girlie show. Also attending are Peggy, Betty, and an unnamed child molester. Excited by what they've seen at the show, the lesbian Peggy bullies th
COMING ATTRACTIONS: ATOR: THE FIGHTING EAGLE 2008-06-04 14:37:33 Back on January 31 fo this year, I made a promise to Mr. WAC from Fish In A Barrel to review Ator. The only problem is that the DVD was on the dreaded Long Wait list at Netflix. Four months later, guess what finally came in? Jesus, Mary, and Joseph! Can someone please explain to me how there could be such an enormous backlog of people so anxious to see Miles O'Keefe in a loincloth that it took f
SHORT FEATURE: SCANDAL - THE WARRIOR 2008-06-06 23:48:04 Watching the trailer for Ator: The Fighting Eagle, I have to say there's one thing that really sticks out. And I mean LITERALLY sticks out. I'm talking about, of course, that great mass of teased and sprayed glory that is Miles O'Keefe's hair. It's a thing of wonder. But that's how we liked our savages and barbarians in the 1980s, with a giant sword in one hand and a huge can of Aqua Net in the
OUTTAKES 2008-06-16 23:19:12 This week’s exercise in bad taste was brought to you by clips taken from 1970’s The Double Garden, better known in the U.S. as The Revenge of Dr. X, with some last minute assistance from the Santa Ana Journal Cooking School of 1935. Please leave all complaints in the comments box.
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