Regular readers may have noticed a lack of content in the last several months. No, we haven’t been shut down by local law enforcement. Nor have we been paid an enormous amount of hush money to pipe down about the local goings on, though we’re always open to any offers.No, we’ve not been writing about the goings on in Broken Springs simply because there hasn’t been anything going on. News h
NEW YORK: It's important that you give a second thought before lighting your next fag -- if researchers are to be believed, smoking can ruin your sex life.According to a study carried out by the researchers, men who smoke cigarettes run an increased risk of experiencing erectile dysfunction, and the more cigarettes smoked, the greater the risk, the Science Daily has reported."Although erectile dysfunction is not a life threatening condition, it compromises well-being and quality of life. Smoking prevention should be an important approach for reducing the risk," lead researcher Prof Jiang He was quoted as saying.In fact, Prof Jiang and his colleagues at the Tulane University School of Public Health and Tropical Medicine came to the conclusion after examining the link between smoking and impotency in a study in China involving 7,684 men.The researchers used questionnaires to assess the status of cigarette smoking and erectile dysfunction. Those surveyed were men between the ages of 35-7
How's everyone? I've been busy trying to find something to write about but so far the pickings are slim. Apparently the decision to make Officer Mort Allgay Interim Police Chief was the worst possible scenario for the future of this particular publication. He's kept the department in tip top shape, which is a pity for our subscribers because now we're forced to bribe people with chocolate to come to this website.As you may have noticed, we did run a story in which we referred to the Police Chief still as Jimmy Kingston. The truth is we will probably continue to do so, only because we find Kingston to be a much more colorful fellow than Allgay. So in the fictional Broken Springs, we like to think - as some of our FOJ friends already do - that Jim Kingston will always be Chief to us.I'm so glad that the Streetscrape Project was completed, as promised, before the start of the fair one month ago. I've almost forgotten what color those orange barrels were that littered our town.Three
I know things have been dead lately. Since the self removal of Jimmy Kingston, there's not a whole lot to write about, unless something big happens, like if the workers for the streetscape project found Jimmy Hoffa. But don't get your hopes up.Cloverleaf Campground is looking for a new Park manager, preferably one who can properly kiss the butt of the Village Council. Good help is so hard to find.And the best news of all is that News from Broken Springs has recently acquired its own domain. Let's give a warm welcome to...Brokensprings.net.Yes, the old blogger address will still be good, but instead of typing out the whole thing, NFBS readers can now just type in brokensprings.net. Much easier to pass around to your friends too. The only bad thing is we'll need to print up some new business cards. Also, no need to hunt up that long email addy to email the editor. Now, to contact us all you need to put in your TO box is editor@brokensprings.net. Easy as pie.But how can NFBS afford su
News from Broken Springs has recently reached a milestone. We’ve been online for less than two years (which is less than half the time our previous publication was online) and we’ve had over 10,000 hits (which is more than ten times what our previous publication had). About this time, coincidently, the last of the “Three Stooges” who once threatened to sue us merely for exercising our first amendment rights (and threatened to arrest us over our last publication) has jumped off the Broken Springs sinking ship. Chief Kingston has agreed to resign. Our fair town is going through some massive changes and I don’t just mean the streets.We at NFBS believe these changes are generally for the better. Perhaps not for the better of this publication because we’re like a tabloid without celebrities now. But for the future of BS, we’re willing to take one for the team. Good riddance, three stooges. Don’t let the door hit you on your way out.Oh, that’s not to say that local stories
Boy, they’re dropping like flies in Broken Springs, aren’t they?First Broken Springs’s Finest, Daniel Shame ups and leaves us to take another job (probably where they have tasers). Broken Springs won’t be Broken Springs without him. Then the Mayor resigns, leaving a big seat to fill in Village government. A huge seat. And soon Slaters Supermarket will be Fartings Friendly Market. Is nothing in Broken Springs sacred anymore?I could see the writing on the wall in the case of Slaters. I first suspected they were in financial trouble when they started getting their shopping carts repossessed. But I guess the day had to come when they finally went under. They overpriced themselves right out of town. I’m one of the few born and raised BSer who never worked at Slaters. I’m neither boasting nor bitching. Just commenting.All I can say is here at NFBS we sincerely hope Jim Kingston is well on his way to a speedy recovery. If not, our blogging days might be over completely.Seriously
The outcome every Arsenal fan feared and perhaps partly expected. Arsenal at times threatened to take off like a runaway train and then came to an absolute stand still in the Philips Stadion. A mental, physical, tactical and tense night will ensue in two weeks time and Arsenal will need to show more character than they did tonight if they really want the chance to amend last season’s Champions League final defeat.
As with Saturday, Cesc Fabregas would have noted that Arsenal faced another former Barcalona player in the opposite technical area intent on using negative tactics. As the home side, PSV displayed no hint of ambition to an almost farcical extent, but Arsenal failed to capitalize and then duly received the predictable sucker punch.
Thierry Henry’s bemusing sense of injustice towards Edison Mendez’s winning strike and the despondent tone of his post-match reaction summed up his side’s second half performance.
“It is a shame because we were
CNN was pranked, and so were numerous other news media outlets, over the latest stunt from a known liar and criminal. This prank was vicious and must be answered with legal actions against the fake prince. This time, he went too far.
Germans & Austrians have added a lot of respected thinkers and inventors, writers and poets to history — but they also added monsters, absurd creatures, and vicious liars. Frederic von Anhalt falls under the last category. I am insulted by this man, and ashamed, since I am German, living in this country. Shame of Frederic von Anhalt aka Hans Robert Lichtenberg, for what he did!
Frederic von Anhalt, 74, born Hans Robert Lichtenberg.
This picture was taken 15 years ago.
What von Anhalt has pulled, not even 24 hours after the death of Anna Nicole Smith, is in my opinion a crime.
He committed defamation of Smith, at the worst possible level, at the worst timing, ever.
Frederic von Anhalt claimed that up to 30 men could be the father of the little ba
Merry Christmas everybody!
I don't know about the rest of you but this weather makes me want to shop "til I drop. Fortunately for my wallet, the weather also makes me avoid traveling on anything with wheels, especially in Broken Springs where hand gestures trump street signs. Just tonight I saw someone stopped on Fairy at Main Street, as if the intersection was a four way stop.
To our knowledge, there was only one casualty in the other night's six hour power outage, not counting the meat in my freezer. The carp that got stuck in the damn, which in turn blew the transformer and shut down the power, didn't survive, despite many efforts on the part of rescue personnel - including our own recently promoted Daniel Shame, who tried saving the fish by giving it mouth to mouth. It's no wonder the poor thing died. As if getting stuck in the damn wasn't bad enough.
But you would've thought the Apocalypse itself came to Broken Springs with no power. It makes you wonder how our ances
Wow… Broken Springs is now famous. Thanks to Dr. Phil, the random googler searching our fair city will now suspect that we're all a bunch of white trash perverts. Is it true that Michael Jackson has bought property here?I want to thank the many people who have approached me and/or my family about these silly articles I write. It means a lot to me that I can bring a smile to your face in the midst of dreary reality. The way I see it is Broken Springers have earned the comic relief.I'd like to give literative fellatio to Township Supervisor Ernie Hildecrust for finally growing a pair in regards to the Police Commission. For too long we've spoiled the Village with double representation. Make them grovel, Ernimator. That's what they get for playing the safety card.Winter is almost here and haven't we all missed it? I don't know about everyone else, but I'm looking forward to seeing that huge pile of plowed snow across the street from the Post Office. There's nothing that
Things have quieted down on the local front, ever since the Underground went underground. Police Commission meetings have gotten so tedious I've opted out of them the last two months. What can I say? Times are busy. Other obligations arise. My life has lately been consumed by real politics, work, and the fall season premiers of my favorite television shows. Oh yes. It's a strange time in life when your favorite actor on tv is a presumed dead member of the mongoose family.In the neighboring town of Buckville, they're about to make the same mistake we made last year in Broken Springs. The school board is negotiating a contract with Laidlow Inc., a private company originally from Canada which will bust up the driver and custodial unions and therefore save the school precious dinero. This is much preferred to cutting the pork out of the budget for the higher ups on the totem pole. If anyone cares enough about the safety and well being of local children, they might want to attend the
